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Archive for the SFW Category

2020

17

Feb

Vanessa Hudgens Working Instagram for Attention of the Day

I originally wrote the headline as “male attention” but realized these young people are all weird and they all fuck each other because they are so liberated and inclusive…that Vanessa Hudgens in her recent break-up, could in fact be seeking pretty much any attention from any gender or even species since we don’t have definitive evidence that she’s not part Sasquatch / Yeti…unless her 5 O’Clock Shadow on her pussy was intentional in her early selfie nudes, before anyone was doing selfie nudes, during an era of every girl wouldn’t be caught dead with pubic hair, to my DISMAY because I love pubic hair…..

That said, her boyfriend she gave a bunch of years to, is now playing Elvis and about to be a hugely booked star, so he did what all dudes who make it do, and dropped the dead weight…because all the hot pussy, famous or not, is going to be throwing themselves at him and thus no time for old table scraps who is too comfortable and who you have been through the wringer with…..so drop her….

He’s on the rise, she knows she’s on the decline as she gets older…it’s just biological science so she’s on the prowl…to either make him think she’s hot, not damaged, etc.

Posted in:SFW|Vanessa Hudgens

2020

14

Feb

Julia Louis-Dreyfus Got Them Tits On of the Day

Julia Louis Dreyfus Tits

This one goes out to all the motherfuckers who have a Julia Louis-Dreyfus fetish. You know some Elaine from Seinfeld who you may not have found hot on Seinfeld, questioning Seinfeld’s taste in women, only to realize she’s actually a billionaire or heiress to a multi billion dollar real estate company in NYC, who said “I want to do comedy”, so she went to Second City in Chicago, before being cast for SNL at 21….then Seinfeld happened…which is probably when you started jacking off to her and her titties….before figuring out how to repurpose herself instead of being type cast like Jason Alexander and Kramer, by doing VEEP and some other shows…because it was never about the moeny…that 100 million she made of Seinfeld is dog shit to what she’s actually worth…

ANYWAY…She’s 59, has been married to the same dude since 1987, had Breast Cancer…seems to have survived….and still has tits, probably not real tits, you know the whole breast cancer cutting off tits situation, but who is to say her tits before cancer were real.

I have no idea why I decided to do a WIKIPEDIA on Louis-Dreyfus but it happened.

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Posted in:Julia Louis Dreyfus|SFW

2020

14

Feb

Sarah Hyland Pelvic Floor Workout of the Day

Sarah Hyland Workout Erotica Tight Leggings

Sarah Hyland may be a genetic freak who has a body that rejects her own organs, forcing her to have multiple Organ Transplants, which for an Alcoholic, with an Alcoholic liver, that’s not the best thing to joke around about, knowing that I too will have my organs give out on me, but in my defense I am basically homeless, broke and pathetic, in a miserable life, eating very bad food….and not some under 30 celeb on a hit show…who should be built stronger, who has access to everything, including but not limited to the organs she harvasted, instead of giving them away to someone more deserving….

ANYWAY…she’s weird looking, for the first half of her career on the now finished series, she looked like an 8 year old…..and now she looks like a 90 years old…and it’s not just the dumb glasses…it’s the dumb face…but the body is tiny, the pussy mound serious, as she tries to build some muscle mass so that she doesn’t die.

I figure you might as well jerk off to this pussy performance from a celeb you’ve watched on TV all these years, I mean she didn’t put the pussy performance online for you to NOT jerk off to it. It’s not like this is GYM inspo or technique…it’s straight up “LOOK AT MY PUSSY PERFORM”….let’s film that and put it to press so the world can also “LOOK AT MY PUSSY PERFORM”….

Give her what she wants, even if she’s weird, you bunch of fucking pervs.


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Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2020

14

Feb

Ariadna Gutierrez Lingerie of the Day

Ari Gutierrez Galore Red Lingerie

Ariadna Gutierrez is the Miss Universe Viral moment that involved Steve Harvey wrongfully crowning her, only to rip the crown from her excited hands, making people around the world laugh, because we love when people fail, especially people as obnoxious as pageant girls, who I guess when in Colombia are just doing it to get international success, which leads to work visas in the USA, so that she can smuggle drugs in her tits like Sofia Vergara and Shakira.

They gotta get those drugs in somehow…and it’s not always practical to do it when shipping Sea Food, or other produce to America, because those packages get searched, but when the mule is a woman the customs officials want to fuck, cuz they follow them on IG or the tabloids…or on TV and get distracted by being star struck…

I mean if you’re a Colombian drug cartel, you might as well use the hottest women you can, otherwise what’s the point of making all that money.



Ari Gutierrez Galore Red Lingerie

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Posted in:Ariadna Gutierrez|SFW

2020

14

Feb

Amanda “AJ” Michalka Bra Top of the Day

Amanda AJ Michalka Bra Top

The Michalka Sisters are still at it..at least one of them is.

There was a time when they were the original Disney Kids to go slutty, which brought joy and happiness to the perverts everywhere who were into Disney Kids…sick fucks…including but not limited to the execs at DISNEY….who cast them or bought them from their evil parents that sold them to the industry.

I don’t really know their history, I’m sure I’ve posted on them at least 100 times over the last 15 years, and this one is out in a bra for you to jerk off to, because I guess that’s what they aim for, I guess that’s how they feel validated.

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Posted in:Amanda AJ Michalka|SFW

2020

14

Feb

Lindsey Vonn Prepping for Valentine’s Day of the Day

You all know that Lindsey Vonn, your American Ski Hero, is marrying a professional Canadian Hockey Player named P.K. which means she’s into the BBC (big black cock)…and I figure that for every racist dude out there disgusted by black on blonde porn, there’s a cuckold who pays black dudes to fuck their fat wives in hotel rooms….not nice hotel rooms…Days Inn looking hotel rooms….where they film the sex and post it to the internet…because nothing better than seeing your wife take a big dick…while your queer ass diddles with your mini-dick….

It’s a thing…and Lindsey Vonn does it without the whole white micro dick in the mix….she just goes straight for the rich black cock and it’s not her first time..she is the definition of “Once you go black”….and I assume it has something to do with her threshold of paid from all her injuries….her high testosterone from her muscles….and most importantly….her thickness that can handle being pounded….because clearly she fucking loves it.

Here’s some of her training for TONIGHT’s BIG Fuck….that will leave her cum farting and possible losing control of her bowels…stretched out right.

Posted in:Lindsey Vonn|SFW

2020

13

Feb

Bebe Rexha Getting Sexy of the Day

Bebe Rexha Sexy Bra Panties

I tried to avoid posting this Bebe Rexha humping the sky bullshit, because she’s disgusting….

I am posting it because figured we should encourage all aspiring popstars pushing 30 to be the whores they were born to be thanks to their vaginas….and celebrate what is an era of all girls trying to be provocative like porn stars…no matter what they weigh in on the scale at…because I may find fat gross and you may find fat gross…but more and more girls are fat so we may need to accept the fat and I know you perverts fuck fat…I married fat…but I’ll never accept fat….and more importantly…she may have hot young fit fans who follow her lead of fucking the air when they want attention….she is influential cuz of her “celebrity” that was created and manufactured…but people are dumb and buy into that…so here’s some old fat popstar too old and fat to be a popstar trying to be hot cuz she’s not.

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Posted in:Bebe Rexha|SFW

2020

13

Feb

Bella Thorne Pre Valentines Tits of the Day

Bella Thorne Tits Valentines Day

It is PRE-VALENTINE’S Day EVE, so Bella Thorne was smart enough to use a tactic of clickbaiters trying to go viral, by doing thematic content built around holidays, so that sites looking for things to talk about on said holiday will use that content…and lead to free publicity….

Bella Thorne, despite her hard man face, is a big deal because she took Disney fame and made it social media fame…and her fake tits had something to do with that…because tits get hits.

She originally started with fitness pics, which turned to bikini pics, and have evolved into unshowered dirty panty pics where she talks about her period, IBS, farting and other things I don’t love hearing….the oversharing generation of “OMG that happens to me too”…..and now I guess she’s doing some Valentine’s Day bondage video, mask on in a position you’d see in porn of a POV dick suck….her face as plastic as most porn chicks…because it’s the porn generation, chronic masturbation and porn addiction applies to everyone, including broken victims of sexual assault…like Bella Thorne…who have nothing better to do all day than fuck, or diddle, or do whatever it takes to reach orgasm….

So why not share some of that with the people….


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Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2020

13

Feb

Madison Beer Bra Top of the Day

Are you the kind of guy who looks at Madison Beer’s tits in a bra top, or are you the kind of guy who looks straight at her pussy in her leggings…to see if you can see her clit smiling back at you as you often can when girls wear leggings, depending on how much of an innie they are, or how fat the outter lips are, or how puffy that pussy is after attaching it to the Vaccuum attachment it is….

I looked at the pussy first, as I do, because I am a fan of pussy and in this era, tits are negligible. It’s like anyone can have tits, dudes can have tits and tits can be misleading…they can be purchased for CHEAP…I mean only 5k for tits is CHEAP…and they really don’t matter because small tits have as much to offer as big tits…thanks to their nipples….

So whether Madison Beer made her name on youtube being a girl with big tits that sang cover songs enough to appeal to fucking perverts who boosted her views and got her a record deal with Bieber or not, her pussy is what matters….so tight pants…good times…as she lures the paparazzi to document her nightly outing, this girl is PAPARAZZI fodder and I don’t even think I’ve heard any of her songs. It’s a manufactured career….as they all are….money is behind this so they are investing in making more money off of it….

The truth of it is she’s not even that hot.

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Posted in:Madison Beer|SFW

2020

13

Feb

Hilary Duff Bikini Poll of the Day

Hilary Duff Bikini

Hilary Duff has been getting fit since having a baby. I assumed it was because she was revisiting her Disney role that made her famous and there was pressure on herself to lean the fuck up because she was one of those thick legged and thick assed bitch who looks like she does crossfit.

The kind of girl you’d want to help move your fridge, or any large appliance, because despite being terrifying her ability to crush watermelons with her thighs was exhillerating, plus a round strong ass from fitness isn’t always the WORST…..

There is finally a trend to health and fitness, skinny is back in, people like the fat kid from BLOW / LOST is a body builder now, Jack Black is trying to get ripped, the dude from Sunny in Philly also ripped….the whole body hacking in your 40s so you don’t die prematurely is real…and I guess rubbing off on Hilary Duff, who could be like all the moms at Starbucks eating cake and accepting their obesity and calling it baby weight, but she’s rich and famous and has access to aborted fetus stem cells to lean the fuck up….

Clearly this is her showing off her bod, doing a BIKINI Poll, where you can see her toned stomach…clickbait, sure, attention seeking, definitely….thirst trapping, obviously…but it’s still pretty fantastic.

No better way to let us know you’ve been working out, than to pretend to care about our opinion of her bikini choices…hilarious.

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Posted in:Hilary Duff|SFW