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Archive for the SFW Category

2019

18

Nov

Samaire Armstrong Wetsuit Erotica of the Day

samaire armstrong bikini top wetsuit erotica

Samaire Armstrong was one of the hotter girls on the OC…and that’s about all she’s done…which I guess was enough as she’s out here surfing or doing whatever it is that she’s doing with her tits out in a bikini…with some wetsuit porn cuz you know these bitches piss in the wet suit to warm it up…it’s standard wetsuit practice that may make the most amateur PEE fetishist pre-mature ejaculate…especially when forced to wear a wet suit during some sort of activity like white water rafting or on vacation after renting paddle boards or whatever it is that people do in wet suits…even the name wet suit…just a suit made out of wetness…better than any TUXEDO RENTAL you’ve had…

I don’t know what the fuck Samaire has been up to all these years since the OC, she’s probably a mom, married to a rich guy living that “once a celebrity but now I’m chilling” the way anyone who was a celebrity SHOULD approach celebrity…get paid / get out / chill til you die…unless I am wrong and she’s still out there trying, and this is her out there trying, in which case…just look at her tits and forget anything I’ve said since it doesn’t fucking matter.

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Posted in:Samaire Armstrong|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Samantha Hoopes Mom Bod Titty Reveal of the Day

Samantha Hoopes was a rumored hooker, like a straight up hooker for rich guys who was able to get published in Sports Illustrated swim to increase her day rate for both social media influencer style campaigns these models get…and for the dudes she was dating…you know more mainstream press, more credibility as a model, more money…

She’s looked 45 since she started the bikini modeling, so she still looks 45, only now she’s fat cuz she just gave birth to her first kid, which we can assume was for financial purposes….her dude likely rich….

While pregnant, a bunch of nudes and sex tapes of her and a dude who wasn’t the current boyfriend surfaced, but their legal team squashed that as fast as they could, since the internet never forgets you can probably google it…and one of those videos involves her dog licking cum off her, because I guess the cum wasn’t rich enough to be inside her, and because she’s a sick fuck….who involes her dog into her sex….

Thanks to being pregnant the bikini model who is no longer a bikini model, but a mom to a rich kid, that will pay her 20k a month when the dude fucks off on her for other bikini models, has massive fucking tits, and since we are in a world of fat chicks and old chicks being celebrated like they were hot chicks…here she is for you….showcasing that pregnancy does destroy bodies…but it makes the tits big though..

She’s selfie-ing her tits in these pics, cuz that’s what narcissists looking for attention do…

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Posted in:Samantha Hoopes|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Sarah Hyland Bath Robe Tits of the Day

Sarah Hyland Tits Bath Robe

Sarah Hyland is filming the finale of Modern Family in Paris, I have no idea why I know that, but I blame the internet….

I can say with confidence that I have NEVER seen the show Modern Family, I have no interest in anything modern, and I prefer traditional gender roles in anything, especially families…maybe it is cuz I am old as shit and grew up in a broken home…with foster parents and shit like that…where that suburban housewife run home was appealing to me…you know a mom who wasn’t a Mexican prostitute dying of AIDS, but instead baked cookies and made PANCAKES on the weekend…the NUCLEAR family that is both wholesome and warm and sweet…instead of the pervert, phone obsessed, families of today….or maybe I just thought it was a dumb concept for the show and the only thing of interest in the show was Sofia Vergara’s tits…a tactic that Sarah Hyland is using here, I guess with getting organs transplanted she’s realized that life is short, make the most of it, and if that means not giving a fuck about producing slutty content, if anything embrace the slutty content it gets you more likes and follows and that’s what is important when you’re dying…having the most impact once you die…so that you leave a legacy of being on some shitty show….instead of doing things that actually matter like raising money publicly for her mystery illness she doesn’t tell anyone about…but that got her two sets of KIDNEYS….so it’s gotta be something serious…but not as serious as how weird looking she is.

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Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Selena New Face Gomez Food Porn of the Day

Selena New Face Gomez Food Porn 2

Selena Gomez slurping up noodles with her new face….you know proving to all you haters that she still has sensation in her face after all those injections, like she can still show facial expressions as she carb loads to supports her LUPUS…as anyone with any autoimmune disease knows…CARB LOAD is the way to cure inflammation…

POINT BEING…I have a feeling she is like that crazy cat lady, who cosmetically surgeried herself into looking like a cat, only instead of a cat she’s turning herself into HAILEY BALDWIN BIEBER…you know because she was out played by Hailey Bieber and Hailey Bieber is living the life she wanted to live as Bieber’s girl…the news of them linking up sent this emotionally unstable one to rehab at least once…and the only logical solution is to “BECOME” Hailey Bieber…and the way to do that is FACE INJECTIONS…it’s some rich actor approach to rejection when every other aspect of their life has been a win…

As a funny side note, when I looked up tagged pics of SELENA GOMEZ on instagram…this is what came up:

Here are those PASTA EATING PICS FOR YOU FEEDERS WHO LIKE PUSSY WHO CARB LOAD like THEY about to RUN A MARATHON but instead just SIT…

TO SEE MORE SELENA GOMEZ AND HER NEWEST FACE CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Selena Gomez|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Demi Lovato Very Tight Leggings of the Day

Demi Lovato Very Tight Leggings

Pop singer and heroin addict Demi Lovato took a morning hike after taking her morning methadone, in a pair of very tight leggings with what looks like her meth dealer, but that could just be the look, grey skinned and bad tattoos….to celebrate sobriety, or as it is known in rehab facilities…the good years….the years where you listend to your urges and fed your addiction to medicate those deep rooted issues you had….instead of spending time trying to work on those deep rooted issues, with the idea or craving of that addiction hanging over you like a fucking black cloud that will eventually kill you…if the food you’ve replaced heroin with doesn’t….

I find the whole Demi Lovato thing pathetic. I am not really sympathetic with mental health issues, I am a believer of the controversial and possibly dated concept of not over prescribing mind altering pharmaceuticals to people who are stressed or sad., and figuring out ways to power through your trauma…without turning to heroin…like turning to alcohol..

There’s nothing worse than sober people talking about the glory days, dwelling on the glory days, instead of living the way they want to live now….

There’s nothing worse than a rich as fuck, set for life, idiot with a huge fan base disrespecting all those fans with her “mental health” issues and addiction issues…inspiring young kids to fall into her shitty life choices cuz “Demi Lovato did it”….without having the resources of Demi Lovato to buy all the pizzas in the fucking world during her recovery time…to make her XL leggings split at the fucking seam…from fatness.

POINT BEING…she’s weak, her recovery boring, her fans should boycott her and give her real reason to reflect on her life in a “poor me” naricisstic fuck way….that leads to opiate overdose…to number the pain of being a rich fucking celebrity….shut the fuck up…there are real people with real opiate addictions who live in fucking trailer parks and on the street…not mansions…I hate everything this trash represents…and it helps seeing how ugly she is on the outside too..

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Posted in:Demi Lovato|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Shanina Shaik Wet Bikini of the Day

Shanina Shaik Wet Bikini

There’s an old joke joke about flat asses that goes something like “I guess she danced her ass off…..literally”…I don’t know if the “literally” is thrown in…but probably for the dumber generation that doesn’t really understand humor in the same way as your generation because they grew up on text messaging software, memes, social media and watching youtube videos…they need blatantly obvious jokes to laugh…you know America’s funniest home video shit…because sarcasm is just not something that translates to a generation of autistic / borderline autistic thanks to the internet…robot fucks…

But as it turns out…Shanina Shaik has danced her ass off…cuz her lower back and her ass are the same fucking level of flatness…

Weird…definitely.

Shanina Shaik Wet Bikini

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Posted in:SFW|Shanina Shaik

2019

18

Nov

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini of the Day

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini

Alessandra Ambrosio is out here putting a test to time…she is saying “hey time, I’m gonna go against all odds, strip down, and be hot, despite being old as shit…”…

She is pushing the limits, the boundaries, all logical sense of being a half naked woman on the internet like she was Liz Hurley…she’s looking at the sand through the hour glass slowly drain, and says “here’s my tits in a bikini cuz these are the days of Alessandra Ambrosio’s life”…

It has been a life in which she may be challenging the concept of age and time…and she may be working harder than she ever has to just fit into that mold or body she had at 20….she made a life and a living out of being hot bodied and half naked, and now she’s got no other option than to keep it going…it’s familiar, it is home, it has done well for her, why bother swapping it out…

So I guess for now, she’s winning…it’s some theory of relativity shit that Einstein conceptualized but I’m not a nerd so I don’t understand that shit…I just know this is a 40 year old mom….but eventually, I’m not sure when, diet, exercise, fitness, modern science…will not be able to support the inevitable…but for now, she’s as hot or hotter than ever in a bikini…but organs, they eventually give out or rot out…but if they have nice tits and asses you can ignore the smells when you shove your dick up in them….at least that’s why my friend who worked at the funeral home told me….

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Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2019

18

Nov

New Underwear Brand in Town of the Day

“We want to build the next big underwear company in the world and rewrite the American underwear story.”

So basically, young people are finally realizing that Victoria’s Secret is a fucking scam, and that their messaging is nothing good, just some billionaire pervert using his mall brand to make more money, but also to Human traffic women into the country under the guise of being “models”…since 80 percent of his promo models are immigrants…

Victoria’s Secret was the top women’s underwear brand in the U.S. but lost market share from 31.7% in 2013 to 24% in 2018 and is dropping harder each day as stores close and as the models they use all turn 50 fucking years old…cuz they know their market will never be the young and genderless…

I guess Victoria’s Secret is also a red flag to the overly sensitive, easily triggered under 22 year olds that are tired of the manufactured, photoshop, non inclusive, gender restricting club….they are more modern than that…and more open to the fact that no all women look like Victoria’s Secret models…to most of our dismay…as a world filled with Victoria’s Secret models would be one far more fun to live in…the 3 am fatty you meet on tinder or at the club that you decide to fuck cuz you haven’t seen a real life pussy in months…would be far more interesting to fuck than the fat…you know if all girls looked like VS models…there would be no uglies to lower ourselves into….cuz even if we’re fat pathetic broke losers…fucking hot chicks is something we’d prefer..

ANWAY..thanks to the EPSTEIN FUNDED antiquated images and stereotypes of “sexy” women wearing lacy lingerie, a 22 year old launched this brand….a kind of undergarment that doesn’t put boundaries on womanhood…which I don’t thing Victoria’s Secret did, it just gave us something to jack off to or visualize when our fat wives tried to wear the same lingerie the hot models wore for sex time…only to look like Chris Farley trying to get into David Spade’s sports jacket that didn’t fit….

So along with some bullshit like this girl saying that underwear is the “connective tissue between your body, which is political and identity-driven,”…sure it is…

Here are some of their photos to show you the future of LINGERIE….mooching off all the people trying to rope people in by making them think supporting this brand makes them inclusive too…

I am all for making underwear for all people but I am old and like things like underwear…you know a 3-4 dollar item…to be sold to me with glitz and glam and aspirational imagery…I don’t need to be here looking at fat girls in the underwear, period stains on the underwear, or the modern DICK in women’s panties of a man who thinks he’s a woman in panties….save that for instagram selfies from narcissists or something…

Sounds like someone’s just trying to mooch off the state of the world…knowing there’s a hole in the market left by old billionare men who built panty empires…

Posted in:SFW

2019

18

Nov

Madison Beer Got Them Tits On of the Day

Madison Beer Got Them Tits On See Through

Madison Beer looking like she’s used up all the double sided tape in Hollywood with her tits out at an event.

A wild dress for a wild YOUTUBER with a stage parent mom that realized the perverts were watching her terrible singing channel when she was underage, cuz YOUTUBE is a fucking fetish site to the world…with stories of BIEBER making it a breeding ground for some VERY bad fucking shit…that is publicly traded on the stock market…and that was polarized by Madison Beer’s mom into relevance…back before they had data to prove her audience was all 50 year old men….so it got her a record deal that she’s been able to use to showoff those tits in a less desperate way, thanks to that mainstream stamp of approval, cuz now the old men execs are in on it…instead of just jerking off to it on YOUTUBE while their wife is out at swim class with the kids…you sick fucks…

Madison Beer Got Them Tits On See Through

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Posted in:Madison Beer|SFW

2019

18

Nov

Sarah Snyder’s Topless Bikini Good Times of the Day

Sarah Snyder is a 24 year old instagram personality, who probably got the majority of her hype when she was 18 or 19 and dating Jaden Smith, you know Will Smith’s kid. They’d go to parties and I guess that helped her get into the media to launch her instagram influencer life…because behind every influencer is some famous dude who legitimized their fake followers…you know who made it real for them and not just some fantasy from their shitty apartment they started out taking slutty pics to build their audience up

She was arrested for stealing a 15,000 dollar purse, like all young people who understand the importance of designer items and luxury, I mean why else do that instagram hustle if it’s not to make money to buy shit they don’t need….to make idiots who follow them like they are important feel inadequate in their life choices of going to school or living that “normal” life that doesn’t involve pretending to be a celebrity…

I guess from that she gets consistent work, makes consistent money, she even went on a date with Leo DiCaprio at least once when she was 22, you know to really assert that she made it…his dick the litmus test and now she’s in a bikini…doing bikini things…topless and in video on some luxurious instagram vacation…good times for all…cuz we get to stare at a young hot body being used to get attention, money and fame…or to maintain attention, money and fame…and it looks real good.

Some Videos:

Posted in:Sarah Snyder|SFW|Videos