SFW Archives - Page 788 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2016

27

Sep

The Side Tit of Bella Thorne’s Tit Analysis of the Day

Bella Thorne decided to take a pic of the side of her perky, possibly fake tit, but maybe not fake…since most redheads I know have big tits, I figure it’s part of their breed’s survival so that people fuck them – and don’t run off scared that they will get their soul eaten by their super redhead strength as these redheads do…there is a reason they were killed off historically after being seen as the devil’s child…the hair color is too inhuman to make sense…

That said…Bella Thorne decided to take a pic of the side of her perky tit saying some shit like “i’m not posting too much of my tit, I’m not a whore showing off my tit, and it’s not even my tit my parents own it and milk it like my little babies I’ve aborted, because they bought them for me to slut out with”….

Which is like a dude with a huge dick posting pics of his huge dick saying “look how small my dick is”….only with tits…and any tits…being played off as being subtle tit…is still tit I’ll look at…so keep bringing the tit..it’s a great marketing hook. I’m sold..

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

27

Sep

Kendall Jenner is So Fucking Average Looking for Allure of the DAy

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Kendall Jenner is so fucking average. There’s nothing interesting or compelling about her. There is nothing hot about her. There is nothing sexy about her. But the industry fucking loves her – because she has following…and she only has following because her whore sister got a TV show from her whoring and they family was relentless enough to monetize the fuck out of every single area they could…by keeping this one white for white people…while the other are too busted and fat to be used the same way…and she’s owning it, like her dad owns being her second mom, despite having a dick…something that doesn’t fuck her up or make her want to escape the sex cult she’s part of…because it pays so well…because she’s got no soul, she’s a fucking puppet..

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2016

27

Sep

Luma Grothe for DKNY Underwear of the Day

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Her name is Luma Grothe, but she’s not Grothe at all…that was one of the worst Mike Tyson Lisp Memes I’ve participated in – but only because it’s the only one, but also the only thing I got for this bitch in her lingerie….

I would say I am better than this low level humor. But I am absolutely not. I am actually not good enough to come up with MEMEs and if I was…motherfucker…I’d have 4 TV shows in production, 2 movies and a fucking POOL house…

I am not simplistic enough, that’s not to say I’m complicated or high brow in my tits and pussy commentary…that my friend nicely referred to as “all you do is call girls whores and sluts”….which isn’t really what I am going for…but I guess that’s how it comes across….

So LUMA GROTHE….with a picture of Mike Tyson raping and beating Robin Givens…it is….because I have no connection to hot chicks in underwear, I’m used to pigs, and DKNY straight from the 1990s were what girls who didn’t fuck me wore…they were too high end….

So if this was a fat slob in K-Mart panties from the 80s despite being mid 90s…I’d be reliving my 20s…instead…I’m forced to MEME…

Posted in:Luma Grothe|SFW

2016

27

Sep

Katy Perry Pretends to Vote Naked for Attention of the Day

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Katy Perry is a big Hillary Clinton supporter – as she would be, you know Women Power and the fact that Trump comes across as a crazy person….not to mention the whole Illuminati theory that the only reason Katy Perry or Hillary Clinton exist is due to some secret society determining what the country sees and experiences…both very rich talking heads designed to push random agendas…like this “Go Vote, even if you don’t want to Vote”…because the election is in a month and half….

And what better way than to do it as a basic joke, for a site that loves basic jokes, as long as said basic jokes are performed by celebrities to make everyone rich…

I refuse to post the video – because I fucking hate everything about that scam Funny or Die…but I’ll post the bullshit and unattractive non-nude pics of Katy Perry…who doesn’t even get naked in her joke video- because she’ll all talk, all noise, full of shit..and her jokes aren’t funny…

You cannot clickbait us with the word naked…that’s my tactic…trick…now pull out those monster tits…

Here a video of the fatty tits eating Sprinkles…as she does…titty fuel…probably better than Funny Or Die’s garbage…die INTERNET…PLEASE DIE….

A video posted by KATY PERRY (@katyperry) on Sep 19, 2016 at 3:10pm PDT

Posted in:Katy Perry|SFW

2016

27

Sep

Carolyn Murphy Channels Her Roots for Vogue Paris of the Day

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Carolyn Murphy is a vintage model…she’s 40…which is 100 in model years, but that doesn’t mean she won’t get any work getting half naked….people like what they are use to…which is why I like Carolyn Murphy…I’ve watched her sex tape at least a dozen times….and why she likes getting half naked – you need to do that to fuck…

So classy and refined brands…like Vogue…don’t seem to care that she fucked in video and released it – or had it “stolen” all those years ago, maybe because she let it fizzle out as it was old school, we’re talking on VHS…yes she’s that old….I guess Vogue accepts that people fuck, and that pornstars come in all sizes and as long as they are models or a Kardashian…and not actual pornstars…they’ll feature them…

I do remember Carolyn Murphy as a Sports Illustrated model….which was a thing before instagram bikini models took over….

But the sex tape….google it…that’s what you want to see…not her in lingerie at 40…there’s no fun in that no matter how good she still looks…it’s still fashion pics…not full on slut pics…

Posted in:Carolyn Murphy|SFW

2016

26

Sep

Sara Sampaio’s Pussy Flash of the Day

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Sara Sampaio is apparently flashing her pussy through her shorts…I can’t really tell, but I can tell you that whenever girls where these beat up short shorts, I always look for the pussy flash or panty flash because it always happens, especially, when the legs are skinny skinny….like Sara Sampaio’s…the Victoria’s Secret model who defends being skinny…a fight us skinny lovers are losing to all these loudmouth body positive fat chicks who don’t realize putting down hot skinny chicks is body shaming…but jealous fat cunts are too loud to make any sense of what they are saying cuz their mouths are all full of cake…

I THOUGHT SHE WAS SPONSORED BY VICTORIA SECRET….this is a bad look for the brand. Their girl they pay tons of money to – doesn’t wear panties…hilarious…what is real in the media…even underwear models don’t wear underwear…all lies…ALL Fucking lies…she’s saying “There’s no point to underwear….”…or maybe she’s saying “Look what happens when you don’t wear underwear…her pussy…a martyr….for the brand…because she’s already put everything about her out there..because they own her.

Posted in:Sara Sampaio|SFW

2016

26

Sep

Katharine McPhee in a Bikini of the Day

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Katharine McPhee is some American Idol garbage you may or may not have masturbated when your fat wife made you watch American Idol, before you lost your job intentionally so you’d have a good excuse to cut the cable, so that she would stop making you watch such shitty fucking TV shows, forcing you to do nothing but fantasize about bitches who would otherwise not know exist, instead of actually fucking girls in your life who do exist, behind your fat wife’s back – because no man should be forced to fuck one thing that looks so disgusting for the rest of their life…

She’s managed to leverage the American Idol Reality Show experience better than most…because years later she’s still being talked about and years later I am still staring at her tits and years later…those tits look fake…in a bikini…having the time of their life in a pool..

Posted in:Katharine McPhee|SFW

2016

26

Sep

Kira Kosarin 18 in a Bikini of the Day

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Kira Kosarin is some new Jailbait to pay attention to. There is always new jailbait to pay attention to. Just leave your house..they are everywhere…

Unfortunately for the real perverts, that’s YOU, she’s already 18, so there’s not going to be a build up of her being more and more slutty for attention knowing she’s 17, before turning 18, because dudes fucking love slutty 17 year olds knowing they can’t fuck slutty 17 year olds…even though those same dudes can’t fuck anything…because they are pathetic losers obsessing over 17 year olds…

She’s just going to be fading into obscurity, from this day on, because she’s more the “Here I am, I’m 18, and I’m half naked, because my body is insane, look at it, it’s insane right”…Right….but no one stays 18 forever…

She’s from Florida, which seems to be the hub for these stage parents, I guess it’s either meth, bathsalts or sell my whore daughter to the industry for Jesus people…because Florida is weird…

Posted in:Kira Kosarin|SFW

2016

26

Sep

Elsa Hosk for Elisabetta Franchi of the Day

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Elsa Hosk is a model…a fashion model…and we have the proof…I know what you’re thinking and that is that Elsa Hosk is actually a nude model, up on a playboy level of nudity model, who tricked the mall brand to make her a half nude promo model, basically a high paid girl handing out toilet paper at Costco model, the kind of career that you’d think actual fashion brands would be turned off by…but that they embrace in this social media world…due to their following…and the proof is in thie Elisabetta Franchi opening scene of their show the other day….where Elsa Hosk nude model shows her diversity as a model…by doing runway modeling….intense…or maybe just proof that modelling is a fucking joke.

Here she is in Lingerie for her Mall Brand Promo Model gig….which is really the only thing people care about when it comes to Elsa Hosk..I mean that and the fact that she gets naked…

Posted in:Elsa Hosk|SFW

2016

26

Sep

Kate Beckinsale Pulling Luggage of the Day

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Kate Beckinsale continuously makes fetish videos for her creepy virgin nerd fans,this one involving a man being inside her luggage, something all her creepy virgin fans dream of….”if only I could sneak into her luggage, I could figure out how to make her love me”…or maybe the fetish is seeing bitches carry their own shit for once in their damn lives…

The highlight of the video isn’t a bunch of middle aged idiots dying with laughter as they laugh away all the laughs can come up with…but rather her tiny little body in tight clothing that explains to everyone why her average at best acting – has allowed her to have a career and a fanbase that keeps building out bullshit Underworld movies…

Magical..

Posted in:Kate Beckinsale|SFW

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