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Archive for the Slut Category

2006

07

Feb

Britney's Parenting Techniques


This is all over the internet, I saw it on TV already, there’s really no point in me posting it because I have nothing interesting to say about it, but I generally don’t have anything interesting to say about much. I guess in Britney’s defense, I will say that my mother was a whore, as in a prostitute and not a whore as in I am a spoiled little rich kid and I hate my whore mother. Anyway, the point of the story is that she used to make me watch her get fucked by random men, I guess they were paying customers and she just wanted to show me what fucking is all about, I was lucky that the few times she did use condoms. She didn’t make me put them on for her, like her own personal condom applicator. I used to smoke cigarettes and drink booze with her when I was 5, and she was between jobs, she treated me like I was her useless slave and made me fist one of her friend’s in some on-stage performance. I think she made 10 dollars or something from it. I had no idea what I was doing at the time and in retrospect, one would find that a little disturbing, but I found it hot, and still do. We were in Mexico and we needed to eat.

All this to say, if driving with your kid on your lap is so bad, you should look at what your neighbors are doing to their kids behind closed doors and more importantly, Britney is rich, and nothing bad ever happens to the rich people.

Posted in:Britney Spears|kids|parent|Slut|Unsorted

2006

07

Feb

Britney’s Parenting Techniques


This is all over the internet, I saw it on TV already, there’s really no point in me posting it because I have nothing interesting to say about it, but I generally don’t have anything interesting to say about much. I guess in Britney’s defense, I will say that my mother was a whore, as in a prostitute and not a whore as in I am a spoiled little rich kid and I hate my whore mother. Anyway, the point of the story is that she used to make me watch her get fucked by random men, I guess they were paying customers and she just wanted to show me what fucking is all about, I was lucky that the few times she did use condoms. She didn’t make me put them on for her, like her own personal condom applicator. I used to smoke cigarettes and drink booze with her when I was 5, and she was between jobs, she treated me like I was her useless slave and made me fist one of her friend’s in some on-stage performance. I think she made 10 dollars or something from it. I had no idea what I was doing at the time and in retrospect, one would find that a little disturbing, but I found it hot, and still do. We were in Mexico and we needed to eat.

All this to say, if driving with your kid on your lap is so bad, you should look at what your neighbors are doing to their kids behind closed doors and more importantly, Britney is rich, and nothing bad ever happens to the rich people.

Posted in:Britney Spears|kids|parent|Slut|Unsorted

2006

07

Feb

Lohan Jr.: Coke Slut in Training


I guess Lohan’s sister has the obvious dream of girls under 18 everywhere, and that is to become a coke slut via a bullshit marketing ploy of a music career. I am not entirely jealous of how easy it is going to be for her to make it in life, I am however jealous that I can’t be the next under 18 year old talentless performer. I know saying that is pretty premature, considering I haven’t heard her sing, she may be a child prodigy, and maybe her sister was just a patsy, being used to pave the way for the real talent in the family, but then I realize that I have just done way too much analysis of Ali Lohan and her future as a rich, infertile from too many abortions (celebs don’t use condoms), child star making meth in her bathtub with that bitch from Full House.

Posted in:Ali Lohan|Coke|Lindsay Lohan|Slut|Unsorted

2006

07

Feb

Evangeline Lilly's Boyfriend's Shirt

I like british people, because they always stand out like a coldsore at beaches around the world. When I was a little younger, I worked as a janitor at a Club Med. I know it doesn’t sound that glamourous, but I figured if I am gonna be a janitor anywhere, it might as well be on a beach somewhere. I guess the benefit of the experience was that the single women thought the “Maintenance” crew were there to act out porno fantasies with them. You know, these crazy bitches with a little money, who run off with their kids on a family vacation, with hopes of giving a serious pooning to someone with brown skin. Anyway, I only did it for a season, but the point of this post is that British travellers on the beach don’t fit in. They are pastey and usually wearing a fuckin’ snowsuit as to not get a sun burn. Evangeline Lily’s boyfriend is no acception to the rule, even though he lives in Hawaii, motherfucker stills swims with his shirt on, unless it’s a way to cover up some deformity, like a third nipple, or no nipples, or anything that involves the nipple.

Posted in:Boyfriend|Evangeline Lilly|Sex|Shirt|Slut|Unsorted

2006

07

Feb

Evangeline Lilly’s Boyfriend’s Shirt

I like british people, because they always stand out like a coldsore at beaches around the world. When I was a little younger, I worked as a janitor at a Club Med. I know it doesn’t sound that glamourous, but I figured if I am gonna be a janitor anywhere, it might as well be on a beach somewhere. I guess the benefit of the experience was that the single women thought the “Maintenance” crew were there to act out porno fantasies with them. You know, these crazy bitches with a little money, who run off with their kids on a family vacation, with hopes of giving a serious pooning to someone with brown skin. Anyway, I only did it for a season, but the point of this post is that British travellers on the beach don’t fit in. They are pastey and usually wearing a fuckin’ snowsuit as to not get a sun burn. Evangeline Lily’s boyfriend is no acception to the rule, even though he lives in Hawaii, motherfucker stills swims with his shirt on, unless it’s a way to cover up some deformity, like a third nipple, or no nipples, or anything that involves the nipple.

Posted in:Boyfriend|Evangeline Lilly|Sex|Shirt|Slut|Unsorted

2006

04

Feb

Jenna Riding the Sybian on Howard Stern

There’s nothing too shocking about Jenna riding a sybian, most of us have seen her riding a whole lot of other things. She has become the trophy spokesperson for porn. She made people think that pornstars have it all together, living a life of glamour and fame when in reality, we all know they are just insecure teenage runaways with addiction and self-hatred.

So bitch is rich…but she did it getting fucked. Anyone with a vagina can do the same thing, it takes zero talent. Her pussy’s still ravaged and she’s been stuffed by so many dudes that her vagina probably speaks its own language. These are pictures of Jenna riding a Sybian on Stern’s show. I haven’t heard his show, I did see his movie. Having bitches cum on radio is kinda useless, I’d rather hear them talk politics.

Her Audio in Second Half of this Link

Posted in:Howard Stern|Jenna Jameson|porn star|Slut|sybian|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

01

Feb

Foreign Big Brother Sex Scene

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This is a clip from some foreign Big Brother. Don’t ask me what season or what country, cuz I don’t speak European. The clip is hysterical because it looks like the girl just propositions the guy to fuck, even though he’s dressed like a circus performer, but I guess it’s the whole “Last Man on Earth” scenario. Anyway, they go to the room, they try to set up a “Safety Wall” so that they aren’t spotted on camera, all while the camera man is zoomin up on them in all their glory, and by glory I mean disgustingness, but glory is a nicer word than disgustingness.

Watch the Video Here

Posted in:Big Brother|Sex|Slut|Unsorted

2006

24

Jan

Paris and A Bonbon

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The thing I hate about Paris is that she is all about annoying fucking poses. I don’t even know the bitch and I find it fucking annoying, it’s like she’s fucking zoolander and all I can think about is taking a bitch like this for dinner and everytime you look at her, she’s rockin’ cliche poses. The chances of me meeting Paris are about as slim as me taking a bitch out for dinner, I was just writing in “hypothetical situations” to prove a point. Anyway, everything Paris does, everything she says, every pose she makes is a drawn out, planned and fake, and i only like fake bitches when they are real dolls, because real dolls don’t judge me for my inability to get erections. They are happy just cuddling.

Posted in:bonbon|Paris Hilton|Slut|Unsorted

2006

24

Jan

Colin Farrell Sex Tape

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The good thing about being a useless website that no one reads is that when I post a link to a celebrity sex tape that was submitted to me, and that I couldn’t actually watch because I don’t know shit about codecs, but assume it’s legit so download it and let me know how retarded it is… I totally lost my train of thought, oh right, I won’t get sued for posting this like that fag perez hilton did. That’s the good thing about being a useless blog that no one reads.

Download sex tape HERE

This is old news, I got it days ago, but forget to post it. Sue me. Get it…Cuz everyone is getting sued over this….anyway download the fucking sex tape and leave me alone.

Posted in:Colin Farrell|Sex|Sex Tape|Slut|Unsorted

2006

19

Jan

Myspace Mom of the Day

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I’m a fun loving girl and I believe that women only emprove with age. Live for my fun and interesting job and of course my gem Trevor who will grow up to b an amazing man. Not like some guys out there… no players here, my page is a dog-free zone! Only real men write to me. I also like to get in touch with women who are adventurous… you know what I mean. The

This women is 41, has a son old enough to check out whether his mommy has a Myspace profile. She lives in Canada and is lookin for pussy on myspace. I find this funny. I would hate to look up my mom on Myspace at a friend’s house and find this, not because she can’t spell, but because she’s airing her dirty laundry and cooter for everyone to see. So her her last bf cheated on her and now she’s into girls, what a fucking cliche, did she learn how do deal with her emotions by watching an afterschool special. Do those still exist? I think they are the reason I have had unprotected sex and smoked rock, I used to watch them when I was 10, they taught me so much, like how to roll a joint and ruin a family.

Posted in:MySpace|Slut|teenage mom|Unsorted