DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

03

Dec

Kate Beckinsale Hot Old Lady in a Bikini of the Day

Kate Beckinsale is a hot old lady, but you already know that…so I’m just here to be like the kids she fucks, because she likes fucking young dudes to steal their youth through her barren menopausal cunt, despite being a fucking BOOMER with a standardized TikTok caption /concept that may ore may not be a thing but should be a thing cuz I’ve seen them do it with “Rich Girl Checks”, “Famous Relative Checks” so why not a “HOT OLD LADY IN A BIKINI CHECK” cuz this is a hot old lady in a bikini….CHECK…

Enough of this nonsense, Kate Beckinsale has never made sense, and still doesn’t make sense…because she’s hot and remains hot…all these years later…on some vampire shit her predominately nerd fans probably fucking LOVE…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kate Beckinsale|Kate Beckinsale|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Ariel Winter is Riding Some Garlic of the Day

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Ariel Winter wore some see through shirt / bra top outfit to some dumb activation or experience that people put together for marketing hype…because people need thing to do, things to instagram, so smarter people put together these idiotic exhibits that really don’t matter, as some massive photo op, with an element of FOMO if you don’t get your selfie at the place, so all these assholes line up like it was a pink wall with a set of wings on it, for their pic…after paying a 20 dollar entry fee. It is crazy…they had one for Ice Cream, one for Saved by the Bell, one for some other shit that doesn’t matter…you get the idea…a Giant Garlic, some Pool Noodles, and a giant martini glass…high concept you fucking bootleg EXPERIENCE bullshit…my pervert neighbor does a more believable experience in his basement haunted house…you lazy fucks.

I assume Ariel Winter was paid to be there, you know to start the momentum on the dumb fucking exhibit….you need influencers there to get it off the ground and to make it a viral thing….but she probably would have done it for free, since it is about her one true love…FOOD.

The troll, who has lost weight thanks to medication according to her….is still a fat chick in spirit….and ultimately…that weight loss makes her better to look at….so long as you don’t state at her neckless face…it’s terrifying…but if she doesn’t kill herself thanks to being sold by her parents and robbed of a childhood and all that standard child star shit, she’ll have a lasting career in horror movies as the villain…RIGHT…good one RIGHT…RIGHT…fuck off.

Anyway, here she is riding a fucking Garlic like some Italian chef’s wet dream since she looks like his fuckign NONYA…

This whole thing is weird.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ariel Winter|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Chantel Jeffries Bikini Instagram Whore of the Day

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Chantel Jeffries is some hooker from social media who was lucky enough to get in on it early, to post enough pics of her ass when it was more of a rarity for girls to be slutty on instagram than it is today, you know when only a handful of girls who were by no means innovative or leaders or visionaries…but rather just naturally inclined to use their asses to get ahead in life so why wouldn’t they bring that to INSTAGRAM…only to have viral pics with every pic cuz people like slutty content…only to make a name for themselves, get brand deals and in Chantel Jeffries case fuck Bieber…get arrested with Bieber…end up in the news with Bieber…paving the way for her to fuck rappers and athletes of all denominations…cuz she was on the map, had status, living that IG model life…and all it took was half naked selfies…SOMETHING girls were doing for free, giving away for free but weren’t slutty enough to do on a bigger platform when no one else was doing it…so they didn’t get this Chantel Jeffries life…

ANYWAY…she’s in Miami, in a Bikini, and in the Paparazzi cuz she has been around long enough, probably considered a senior or old in the IG model life, but she officially matters now and this is her mattering…

To See The Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Chantel Jeffries|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Olivia Wilde Hot in a Creepy Titty Dress of the Day

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This looks like pyjamas from an 1800s ghost story, which should be porn to you….but it also looks like a night gown your granny would have word in the 70s, which shouldn’t be porn to you, but probably is, since no one’s got a cookie like granny’s cookie, a cookie she taught you how to eat when you were just a teenager, because she had been a widow who lived alone for 20 years and it just made sense when young masculine energy entered, to fully take advantage of the situation…..I guess it also looks like a wedding dress, something you’d find in a period piece…

The problem is that you can’t actually see her tits, which defeats the purpose of wearing a slutty vintage looking historical night gown in public….but Olivia Cockburn, who goes by WILDE for obvious reasons, is still hot to me…so even just a sliver of tit is enough tit…better than no tit…TIT…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Olivia Cockburn|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Jewel Big Titties in a Swimsuit of the Day

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Jewel’s hands may have been made small but her tits are big…in the event that you aren’t a 50 year old lesbian…Jewel, who was an iconic voice of women in the 90s, she was on every single WOMEN IN SONG CD, had a song called HANDS…and the lyric was her hands were made small…which is so fucking clever of me to reference cuz her tits are big…

But you already knew that, we’ve been around Jewel’s tits for 25 fucking years and we know what they are about, and clearly she’s out here trying to remind us…

You can save your soul…by not listening to Jewel’s music….but it can be a great reminder of 1995, when you were just a loser in High School, jerking off to her tits or maybe her songs….like you were some record exec who gave her a storyline that she lived in her car before becoming a huge success as a coffee shop poet…which I guess was a thing in the 90s…when Starbucks was starting up….or the record exec who found her in her car and offered her a warm shower and a record deal for a fuck…

EIther way, she’s still around….and these are her tits in selfie.

Posted in:Jewel|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Madison Beer Gets It with this Hand Bra of the Day

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Madison Beer’s mom clearly taught her well back when they were scamming YOUTUBE views to give the illusion that they are relevant so that record deals sign them up, despite only really getting those views because YOUTUBE – OWNED BY GOOGLE – or is it called ALPHABET is a fucking HUB for perverts to dig through the videos uploaded to see all the kids trying to become Youtubers through perverted fucking videos of them dancing, jumping on trampolines, trying on bikinis, etc…

Madison Beer was just early enough to the game, thanks to her mom’s stage parenting foresight, to polarize those views…since the record labels don’t ask for details on the audience or the view, they just look at the top number and that’s enough to convince them to throw money at the Youtube channel of cover songs to cultivate her as a talent….and since then…she’s been in the paparazzi, doing social media shit, building up her career as a legit pop act, not a youtube act, like so many other popstars of today….since they all start on social media….but she knows, and her mom knows, and we know…we’re just here for the tits…

So as she powers through “celebrity” tits first, she occassionally acknowledges those tits, and gives them a high five for their help in her story…and I guess this is that….

Posted in:Madison Beer

2019

03

Dec

Jessica Alba Looking Like She Grabbing her Pussy of the Day

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If you look at these pics from afar, and you should, because Alba’s hands look old and scary as shit, because she is old and they don’t have a solid FACE INJECTION solution to make hands look as youthful and stretched out as faces, or if they do, Alba hasn’t bought into it yet…..despite EVERYONE knowing NECK and HANDS is the way to age a woman, like cutting a tree in half and counting the rings….if you know what i mean…

But if you look at these pics from afar, it looks like the aged Alba billionaire e-commerce celebrity, is on the side of the road giving herself a hunched over diddle cuz she just got that itch…or because someone punched her in the stomach…or because her old tired uterus is having some pre-menopause convulsions….or because she’s about the throw up….

Sure she’s really just looking at her tire with an ipad in hand but WHERE is the fun in that…the side of the road pervert diddler diddling herself is a better NARRATIVE….

I need to use the world NARRATIVE more often.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Kira Korsarin Bikini of the Day

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Kira Korsarin is a Nickeloden child star but you already knew that you sick fuck…

Like all child stars, she’s now 22, so not too young to jerk off to, because age is not just a number, it’s a fucking law you sick fuck….and she posts up smutty content for her millions of fans in efforts to get millions of more fans…since it pays to have fans…

I mean she started out on TV, she should theoretically be more relevant than all those IG sluts out here doing the same thing as her…she’s got a YOUTUBE where she does cover songs, I guess she can sing, like all Child actors sold to the industry, which I guess turned into a music career, having launched her first album…since music fucking pays, just ask DIPLO, while acting pays far less….and I guess this is her promoting her garbage…tits out…which is apparently something she does on the regular as she tries to establish herself…as she fucking should..

Posted in:Kira Korsarin|SFW

2019

03

Dec

Girls Brawling in Sewage and Other Videos of the Day

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Double Knockout

Man with Hammer Tackled by Cop

Indonesian Army Training

Idiot on a Bike

Strange Party

Shakira’s Cousin Shaking her Hips

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2019

03

Dec

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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I get drunk every night and pass out on the floor. Usually at home alone while watching random Christmas movies, basically all year round and not in this VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS season…because why limit the drunken holiday office party to just one day a year…when you work alone…it can be everyday…and when you molest yourself when drunk you can’t get fired….you can get herpes though…apparently…so I’ve heard…always wash your beef salami slices from the back of your fridge before you fuck it.

I wake up throughout the night laughing out loud…or LOLing to you young folk who don’t know what letters that make up words are for since it is inefficient….anyway I wake up from jokes I tell myself in my sleep…perverted jokes, jokes about being molested or not being molested, rape jokes, you know good shit…but when I wake up…I rememeber none of them. It is like the ghost in my house is an ex comedian who just fucking chats me up all night making me laugh despite not liking to laugh….only to take those jokes away from me before I can share them for you….or maybe it is just Cabin Fever..I haven’t really left the house, if you can call it a house, since mid september…besides grocery stores once a week….so we’ll go with cabin fever other than the talking to myself…the feeling of the walls caving in on me…it feels like a mould filled womb…the only womb I’ve ever known..

So while I set up a seance to lure my ghost to bring me the comedy I can steal to make fun of celebrities and their tits….here are some CHRISTMAS COOKIES in the form of stepLINKS not GINGERBREAD MEN…cuz Gingers have weird overly pink pussies that scare me.

Everything Streaming in December – Good to Know
CLICK HERE

Dogs are More Human than People
CLICK HERE

Can you Photocopy Money
CLICK HERE

Ratcow Nude Tits
CLICK HERE

Mickey Mouse Sounding Angry Woman VS Protestor
CLICK HERE

Pussy Cat Dolls Return Performance
CLICK HERE

Actors Union Investigating America’s Got Talent Firing of Gabreielle Union cuz Bitch was Born a Union – Shoulda Never Hired Her
CLICK HERE

Lebron James Farting on his Fans
CLICK HERE

Dudes Doing Commentary on IG Models as they Pose Live
CLICK HERE

Protest Video in a Make-Up Tutorial on TikTok VS CHINA
CLICK HERE

Comedian Told to Pull Trump Puppet from Act – Complies Cuz He’s a Pussy Bitch There for a Paycheck
CLICK HERE

Teddy Bears Thrown on the Ice
CLICK HERE

The World’s Biggest Tramp
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS