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2014

06

May

Izabel Goulart Juicing Porn of the Day

Izabel Goulart makes juicing seem far more erotic than the lesbian with hair armpits who works at the cold press juice bar….up on some organic penis hating vegan shit…

It’s like put a babe with a rocking body in a cowboy shirt her model implants spill out of and I’m motherfucking sold on whatever the fuck she’s selling. Whether it’s organic, healthy living bullshit she suggests I follow, not because I want her body, or believe it will make her fuck me, or make me look healthy and live longer…but because I like staring until the people around me feel uncomfortable…but more importantly, because I want to trap other girls who want too look like her and who dress like her, but who aren’t famous, who work 9-5 jobs, and who are attainable since they aren’t her…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

06

May

Heidi Klum vs a Popsicle of the Day

Heidi Klum is doing the whole popsicle sucking thing that you’d expect a Lolita style seductress to do at the hotel pool for some traveling salesmen sitting next to her, intentionally to piss of her dad, get a reaction, and because at 18 a bitch likes the power she has when she figures out how easy it is to seduce men…only Heidi Klum is 100 years old, making it hardly very erotic, especially when she posts it to her instagram in a “HEY LOOK AT ME I SUCK POPSICLES IN BIKINIS – LOOK AT ME – I STILL GOT IT – EVEN AFTER SEAL DESTROYED MY VAGINA WITH HIS MASSIVE PENIS AND A DOZEN BABIES THAT’S WHY I WEAR A SKIRT INSTEAD OF BIKINI BOTTOMS”…because sure she’s hot for 100 years old, but if I want to jerk off to her, I’ll just google her old stuff….not that I’d ever jerk off to her, there’s too much fresh vagina out there, ready to suck popsicles for instagram who I would rather see.

Posted in:Heidi Klum

2014

06

May

Woman Squirts Breast Milk into Office Milk carton of the Day

This is my kind of office employee, no only does she wear a hot slutty outfit to the job, but she also sabotages everyone’s coffee by squirting breast milk into the milk carton.

I am going to assume this is a hidden camera fetish video, because I have a boner watching it, and not an actual behind the scenes security video of a crazy worker but maybe, they just work at the best office ever.

This shit is HOT…

Posted in:Videos

2014

06

May

Candice Swanepoel Pretends she’s a Cat of the Day

There’s a fetish in Candice Swanepoel getting paid between 10,000 and 50,000 dollars to be the face of some brand I assume is asian where they dress her up as a cat and provide giant humans sized cat toys to play with for the fucking perverts…

We call this an example of where modelling meets fetish prostitution, you know where money will make a girl take a creepy fucking thing and make it all seemingly ok…and I am all for that…because any excuse…to be a fetish prostitute works for me…

IT’s like throw many at a bitch, and she’s down. Everyone’s got a price.

Posted in:Candice Swanepoel

2014

06

May

Madonna Rejected Outfit of the Day

Madonna, in being Madonna decided to make the Met Ball about her, by posting a picture that instagram would normally ban an account for, but not when it is Madonna because she’s Madonna…and I don’t really understand the context of what she wrote as the caption…

What i wanted to wear to Met Ball but Anna said not this year! So I’m gonna work on music instead?

I just know it happened…and it really isn’t fap-able- so why fucking bother posting it…because celebrity nipples or titties tied up like it was bondage scene, that even at 60 are interesting enough to look at, even though I am sure this isn’t her outfit at all, but rather just an old pic!

Posted in:Madonna

2014

06

May

Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss are Total Lesbians of the Day

You know what they say, girls who get ready for events together are totally shoving things in each other’s asses while licking their vaginas…as lesbians do…

Taylor Swift has run through so many dudes that it’s time for her sexual deviance to hit fashion / lingerie models I guess…

Or maybe, they are just two girls leveraging each others success, who are truly just friends with each other, and who aren’t filming at home fist videos as lesbians do…and really if they were lesbians, it’d be a good storyline for her constant broke heart to sing about.

Ultimately, it’s Taylor Swift, who cares.

Posted in:Taylor Swift

2014

06

May

Elizabeth Rice Nude Scene of the DAy

I’ve never heard of 29 year old Elizabeth Rice, but apparently she’s really famous…

She did a movie called My Dog Skip…something I assume you probably masturbated when you found the DVD it went straight to in the garbage outside the video store…

Apparently, this is her nude scene in something called BUTT WHISTLE…whatever the fuck that gay sounding mating song is….she’s also been in Mad Man…so maybe that’s why people care…but now that we’re in a nudist generation where everyone gets naked…I just don’t think it matters…

Either does all this other CABLE NUDITY that you can see if you CLICK HERE

Posted in:Elizabeth Rice

2014

06

May

Cinco de Mayo Racism of the Day

As a part mexican named Jesus, I find Cinco de Mayo to be one of the more racist events of the year. I figure it’s on par with celebrating Jewish Day and walking around dressed like one of those Orthodox pilgrim people, or celebrating Chinese New Year, walking around pulling at your eyes to make them slanty…and shit…

So I turned to instagram and found very fucking little erotica – but a whole lot of sobrero’s because society says it’s ok to laugh at Mexicans in a fun taco eating way, but not at anyone else, especially not the gays or blacks…hypocrites…

Posted in:stepLIST

2014

06

May

Crazy and Hilarious Scooter Accident and Other Videos of the Day

Truck VS Wind…

Girl’s Abortion Video….weirdness…

Girl on Molly Vs Lights…

Girl Drinks Coke Upside Down….

Chick Fight that Ends with a Hit to the Head with a Shovel

Posted in:Videos

2014

06

May

Met Gala Happened Last Night of the Day

I don’t believe in these pretentious, who’s who type events, I am more about getting drunk in the gutter, or spending money on things that don’t involve rich and famous people stroking each other’s egos…

Even if some freak accident happened and all of a sudden I became famous as fuck, I would never attend these things, they don’t have strippers, they are uptight and they seem like the worst possible event possible..shit is a nightmare…

But these bitches who think they matter because you think they mattered and Madam Meow was there to capture some of the best and worst of the very very very important night that is so not important in the grand scheme of the fucking world…especially in the grand scheme of your life…in fact I hate myself for posting these bitches all dolled up in hair and make-up showing tit like they are more interesting than they are…which isn’t interesting at all…but who take this shit seriously, I mean Kim Kardashian, pornographer and midget, even put on some panties you’d probably be scared of sniffing…

CLICK HERE

Lily Donaldson is a model and I like model bodies…

I don’t know who the fuck this twat is…but she was there…

Cara Delevigne and Rihanna

Hayden Panettiere’s Breast Implants are Good…

Olivia Munn’s Tits because She’s Reaching….

Johnny Depp and Amber Heard Being Theatrical

Maggie Gyllenhaal’s Sloppy Tits…

Emma Stone’s got a Weird Face….

Reese Witherspoon Fat Ass Looks Less Fat…

Rita Ora VS Rihanna because That’s Her Whole Purpose…

Beyonce Still Fakin’ It

Georgia May Jagger’s Good Times…

Nicole Richie is Creepy as Shit

Chrissy Tiegen’s Pug Face Pregnancy Belly….

Kate Upton Using Her Big Titties is Cuz That’s All She’s Got…

Here’s a Kate Upton Sports Illustrated Video…Really Annoying….

Here are the instagram pics…

Oh and most importantly, midget Kim Kardashian wore panties….


TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Events