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2010

23

Mar

Lindsay Lohan’s Hiding in Her Old Chick Shirt of the Day

Lohan is in hiding and I’m not sure why. It’s not like she has a career or image to protect. I can only assume this is straight from her ego and her vanity trying to hide something embarassing like maybe she’s got a cold sore from sucking dirty Hollywood dick or a rash or bad collagen lips….I just know her shirt “Old Chic(k)” is pretty fucking fitting…

Don’t get me wrong, I still love Lohan and every text message I send her that she ignores, but her cover-up is pretty fuckin’ weak…she might as well get someone to carry a neon sign behind her that says “Lohan is Drunk and has a Herpe sore on her lip she doesn’t want seen”…cuz it is that obvious….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Hiding|Lindsay Lohan

2010

23

Mar

Mischa Barton and Her Cellulite in Shorts of the Day

All girls have cellulite, even skinny girls have cellulite, it’s got something to do with their uterus and the way it makes babies, hell, I probably have cellulite…you know it happens when you’re fat as fuck, even when you’re a dude…so cellulite is really not a big deal or something to point out and laugh at, but for some reason, when it’s on Mischa Barton, who is already at the end of her fucking road and a sloppy mess who always had sloppy fucking legs, I find it pretty entertaining….it’s like bitch doesn’t give a fuck and still wears shorts and I’m not sure if that’s a sign of her not giving a fuck about what others thinkand embracing herself, of it it’s a sign of her just not giving a fuck cuz she’s given the fuck up…

I never found her hot, it was all downhill from the kid puking on herself in the Sixth Sense, but maybe you did, so here are some pics to remind you that you shouldn’t….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Cellulite|Legs|Mischa Barton

2010

23

Mar

Molly Ringwald and her Boobs Look Horrible of the Day

I’ve seen all the 80s movies and I don’t think Molly Ringwald was ever cast as the hot chick…I doubt guys every had crushes on her…I knew she was the weird awkward looking skinny chick other girls could relate to.

So there was no surprise she’d age horribly, but I didn’t expect her to ever look like this….seriously…this is the kind of girl you put in a rehab center with rapists and sex addicts to turn them asexual….lend her to Tiger Woods for a month and dude will be fine….or the kind of person closet case fags date so that they don’t have to dive into homosexuality but can test the waters thanks to her her broad shoulders and thick back…

She’s doing Yoga, showing off some mom tit, not bothering anyone, so I am an asshole disrupting her quiet life that came when she escaped from Hollywood, one far less morbid than Corey Haim, but I do think people should think about getting her more work…I’m sure tons of movies need someone to play the school janitor….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Molly Ringwald|old|Scary

2010

23

Mar

Sophie Turner’s Tits Distract from her Face of the Day

My last celebrity defamation lawsuit threat came from this bitch, Sophie Turner….who I am sure isn’t legally allowed to call herself a celebrity, but for some reason, I like to call her tits, manages to still get noticed and defended by die heart fans….I wrote that she looked like a pornstar or a whore, which if you I were to ever see her on the street I’d say something like “hey that bitch looks like a pornstar, let’s google pornstars and see if we can find her” but apparently she thought that was worth having her laywer write me a letter about….so when I see pictures of her and her perky fake tits..or her “alledged” fake tits…it reminds me of goodtimes those goodtimes….

So we may not know who she is…but people took pictures at the airport of her so she must be someone going somewhere important to do something important…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Sophie Turner|Tits

2010

23

Mar

Catholic Priest No Longer Celibate of the Day

Catholicism is a dated concept that just didn’t evolve with our times. We are a sexed up society and depriving people of sex just ends up in kids getting molested. So when I see a priest quit working for the church because he knows everything he learned in priest school was bullshit and that God will not turn on him for living a good life that includes banging chicks, kinda like when you see Doctors smoking, it makes me happy knowing that dude followed his biological needs, instead of deprive himself and leave him so charged up he takes a blowjob from an alterboy…

I am not against faith, just faith that makes no sense, and this bitch named Faith who I met at a bar down the street who spat in my face when I asked to see her boobs….making bumping into her always annoying…I am just curious who in their right mind would give their lives to God to work for the church in this era, other than homeless people looking for a job, warm bed and food and closet case homosexuals….and I guess what I think doesn’t matter…but I do like seeing this move from Pristhood to the Clithood…you know from the confession booth to the bedroom and if he gets to keep his priest dress, some grown up Catholic private school girl with negative feelings towards the church will get to live out some serious fantasies, like the Catholic private school girl I once met who was so repressed she’d masturbate with a Virgin Mary statue in her mom’s room…for fucking serious….

Posted in:Catholic|Priest

2010

23

Mar

Britney Spears Looks Like She Smells Good of the Day

Watching Britney is like watching a homeless woman dig through the garbage looking for cans. Part of me is disgusted of the smell you think she gives off, while another part of me is sad her life has gone this route, because you know when she was a little girl she wasn’t dreaming about digging through the trash, and the main part of me find shit hot as fucking hell, cuz those gutter down on their luck girls are easy…

I don’t know what’s going on here, but I think it’s safe to say no showers were involved or hurt in the making of these pictures….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Britney Spears|Messy

2010

23

Mar

Coco’s Got a Retarded Ass of the Day

Coco’s ass is on another level of ass. It’s like shit is it’s own person or some shit, like her syamese twin who didn’t fully develop. It’s got it’s own name, it’s own cellphone, it’s own preference in restaurants and meals and a mind of it’s own that only Coco can communicate with because it’s mouth only spits out shit.

Coco used to be jealous of all the attention she got, but decided to embrace it and make it work for her…like she had been doing with her vagina all these years….cuz she’s that kind of woman….

So I may not understand this shit or find this shit hot…but it’s definitely something worth exploring on a scientific level, like make a fucking Discovery Channel show on the shit, because I want to know the story behind this and I want to know what’s really going on here….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ass|Coco

2010

23

Mar

Mila Kunis is a Hot Cowboy of the Day

I have a think for Cowboys, especially when they aren’t Gay and in bars causing me headaches after having temper tantrums about comments I make to fat groupies.

I also have a thing for Mila Kunis, this girl drives me crazy pretty much everytime I see her, until I think about how she’s engaged to Home Alone Culkin, who looks like he is dying a slow HIV positive death from sharing needles…not that that would stop me from sharing her as he foams at the mouth in the corner thanks to all the pills he’s been popping…

Seriously…Mila Kunis is perfection. I watched Forgetting Sarah Silverman at least twice because of her sex scene and she was the only reason there was That 70s Show.

So good job GQ at making all my dreams come true…

Posted in:Cowboy|GQ|Mila Kunis

2010

23

Mar

Miley Cyrus Does the Lohan of the Day

These pictures bring back memories of when Lohan was just 18 and at her peak before everything fell apart cuz the dude from The 70s Show broke her heart and made her spiral into drugs, lesbianism, random cock, partying, only I think Lohan showed off a little more cleavage, but I don’t really remember since it happened so long ago, long enough to make me think most of her career has been spent not working and being talked about in the media than actually acting in movies. This whole celebrity thing is a fucking joke. It annoys me. But I am excited to see fame chew up Miley and spit her out, you know as she tries to re-invent herself in “Adult Roles” just because it’s more entertaining than any movie or TV show she’s ever been in.

Here she is doin’ the Lohan, predicting what’s to come…

Pics via Bauer
Pics via Fame

Posted in:Lohan|Miley Cyrus

2010

23

Mar

Audrina Patridge in a Hot Outfit of the Day

Audrina’s got a great body…Sure, it looks better when she’s photoshopped, but then again who doesn’t look better when their retard face is made to look normal and her legs are made to look long and luxurious. I can only assume it’s got something to do with evolution, you know how the stupid dogs in the dog park are always the biggest and strongest, while the smart ones can survive using their intelligence, the idiot ones rely on their ability to run fast, because based on Audrina’s body, she could run away from oncoming traffic if she happened to step into the shit, where as someone like me doesn’t know how to run, but would never get myself in the situation in the first place. That’s not to say I’m smart, but it is to say I’m fat and I’m pretty good at staying that way…but who cares about me…here are pics of Audrina in what might be the hottest picture of the day…and one I can only hope carries into the lives of everyday girls….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Belly|Shorts|Tits