I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

20

Oct

Shauna Sand is a Living Bargain Basement Sex Doll of the Day

I used to have a pretty weird friend who was the biggest pervert I knew, but he had one problem, he couldn’t get himself laid. He had hygiene issues and a pretty abrasive personality that even made numerous hookers walk out on him before he got started, so that all just made him even hornier and hard to deal with.

One day, he had come into some money and decided that he would spend it on a sex doll, but he didn’t have enough money to buy a new one, or even a full one, so he’d buy the bitch used and in sections.

First he ordered the big breasted torso, with a pussy that had only been fucked by a handful of people and for a while he fucked the shit out of it, putting him in a pretty good mood, but he got greedy and wanted a head. Partially because he got weirded out with himself for fucking a lifeless torso, making him question how far he was willing to go to get off, and whether getting off to a torso meant he was into fucking dead body but a face would make it feel that much more normal, so he hit the internet and found a head that only had some damage in the mouth from the previous face fucking owner and it was missing an eye, but shit was cheap so it was a good enough…..

So he put that fucking thing together and shit looked just like Shauna Sand, you know, plastic, falling apart, cheap and lifeless, all motherfucker needed was to invest in the limbs and get the fucking thing possessed by some ancient Egyptian Gods so it partially came to life at night like shit was that movie Mannequin and it’d be a step up from Shauna Sand because the plastic pussy had only been fucked by a handful of random dudes that a little Mr Clean can clean off, where as Shauna Sand is a high risk encounter.

And the point of the story is to say that that pretty weird friend of mine was actually me….

Pics via Fame


Shauna Sand Sex Tape Clips Exclusive

Posted in:Shauna Sand|Whore

2009

20

Oct

Rachel Bilson Looks Shitty in Shorts of the Day

So this is what Rachel Bilson actually looks like….interesting…..

She’s go short pasty legs, looks pretty sloppy and unshowered like a bitch suffering from some kind of depression cuz she can’t get work and hates her life, she may even be a little chubby….but I can’t really tell because I am blinded by brightness of her white legs, like she’s shining a fucking flashlight in my eyes or some shit…..

I guess some people like to call this the look of someone who has given up, I like to call it the look of someone about to get marriage and the point of all this is to say, I’d still fuck her.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Rachel Bilson|Shitty|Shorts

2009

20

Oct

Katy Perry and Russell Brand are Disgusting in Love of the Day

This is a horrible way to wake up, the only salvation we have is that Russell Brand’s heroin addiction was actual fact and not just a bullshit book he wrote as an “autobiography” from his parent’s basement that lead to his MTV career and that lead to his Hollywood career, and that he shared needles, is too scared to get tested for AIDS and has infected this Katy Perry dog so they both live sick and miserable lives with no energy to perform ever again.

The only thing that makes sense in all this is that I thought brand was a full poofter and that his sex jokes were all just the same bullshit that landed him his career, when really he wanted to rim Seth Rogan with his cock head or some shit, so that would explain why he’s so smitten with Katy Perry, because he doesn’t realize she is the ugly pig that she is, he just knows pretending to kiss her is good for his career…..and the whole thing is pretty fucking sick.

Pics via INFphoto

Posted in:Katy Perry|Love|Russell Brand

2009

19

Oct

stepLINKS of the Day

I guess I should post my stepLINKS. I was going to go out drinking, but it turns out my friends have as much loyalty as Balloon Boy has to his family, because thanks to his inability to lie on national TV, mother fucker is sending his dad to jail. You see that was probably the one time in his life he should have lied and this whole thing is going to scar him and I predict alcoholic, drug addict, pill popper scared of relationships and possibly suicidal is brewing somewhere inside him, and brewing somewhere in side me is the need for beer that was brewed a few months ago specifically for me….

Paris Hilton is Such a Self-Entitled Cunt
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Check Out The Tits on This Chick….
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Here is a List of The Best Fights in FIlms….
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Lily Allen and Her Dumpy Body are Topless Again
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The Amazing Covers of Screw Magazine for the 70s that You Will Laugh and Masturbate To….
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Nice Collection of Pics from the 2009 Stike TV Scream Awards
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Because If You Weekend Was as Shitty as Mine Was, You Need a Pick Me Up
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The 10 Hotest Indie Girl Sluts
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Facebook Fail of the Week – This is Awesome
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How Microsoft Singlehandly Fucked Over a Nation of Sidekick Users
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Alessandra Ambrosio Panty Upskirt
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The Japanese Make Everything Better, So Here is Their Version of Baywatch
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Jessica Biel is Kind of Pathetic
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25 Motivational Posters That Really Aren’t That Motivational, But Will Make You Laugh
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Lohan Has Made Her Way Back to the Peen!
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Stripfilm of the Day
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However Fucked Up You Thought Anna Nicole’s Last Days Were, They Were Worse
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Soem Video From the Set of Rihanna’s New Music Videoth
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John and Kate Plus 8 Has Officially Been Canned, But Something Tells Me This Won’t Be the Last We Hear From Them
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Some Sluts From the Liquid Metal Fashion Show
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Balls Beer For Health Care Reform
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Live Nude Comedy Starring Tonya Kay
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And That’s Why You Don’t Show Off On a Motorcycle
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These Britney Spears Bikini Shots Wouldn’t Be Half Bad If She Didn’t Look Pregnant
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A MLIF and 2 Young Lesbians
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Calir Banks is Horny on the Couch
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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And There Goes the TV – VIDEO
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Jessie and Her Toy
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Lookin Good Sweatheart
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The Best of British Boobs – Gallery
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3 Hot Babes on the Rocks
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The Goodness of Cody Lane
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who is Victoria Justice
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Some Emo Sluts Self Shots and Videos
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Tommie Jo is Busted
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Heidi Honey is Topless By the Lake
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Google Wave – Pulp Fiction
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Take It Off Baby, Take It All Off
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Every Single Kramer Entrance Ever
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Slim Shady Star Trek
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Does This Qualify as Rape of Some Sort?
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This Balloon Boy Hoax Shit is Getting Out of Hand
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Sexy Halloween Costume Cleavage Collection [108 Photos]
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Think You Have Seen Big Tits, Think Again
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Japenese Wrist Cutting Commercial
Seriously, WTF
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NEW JERSEY’S HOTTEST JEWISH GIRL STRIPS DOWN NAKED JUST FOR YOU … AND OY VEY DOES SHE HAVE NICE TITS!
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This is Tamara and You’ll Wanna Fuck Her….
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BONUS VIDEO – WEIRD EMO GIRL BEDROOM STRIP SHOW

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

19

Oct

Eva Amurri’s Still Getting Topless on Californication of the Day

Susan Surandon’s daughter still knows her place in the entertainment industry as a rich kid crying for attention by being the ugly face with the amazingly huge tits topless on Californication. She was topless on the show already and I guess I’m not complaining cuz that would be gay, since her tits are amazing, but I do always wonder if dad’s can jerk off to videos of their daughters getting naked on TV or in video if that is wrong since society frowns upon it.

See I’m not a dad, I’m a stepdad and as a stepdad I can legally jerk off in my stepdaughters and I didn’t even make them, like my own little science experiment in my wife’s uterus, so I can’t understand how anyone could not look at a chick like a sexual object, especially if he made the fucking thing, if anything that should make him like her even more, because he sees beauty in her busted down face, all forcing Mr Amurri to keep it secret if he likes it more than he should and here is a video to help him with his struggle.

Here is the whole scene to burn the little bandwidth I have ….

Posted in:Californication|Eva Amurri|Topless

2009

19

Oct

Katherine Heigl Plays With Marisa Miller’s Ass of the Day

It looks like a fat Katherine Heigl has a new job that involves fixing Marisa Miller’s bikini for her photoshoots, unless that’s not a picture of Katherine Heigl at all, and is really just someone with the same diet as her, which I guess would make sense, because Heigl is the kind of bitch who wouldn’t get naked next to Marisa Miller’s insane body, for fear that she would make her look fat, without realizing that everything makes her look fat, because she is fat, and this is just some photo assistant, who doesn’t give a fuck about lookin’ as hot as Marisa Miller, but is just happy getting flown to beaches and getting paid for cunts like Marisa Miller to grace the pages of a magazine, proving that in her own way, she’s pretty much at the top of her game too and here are those pics…

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Katherine Heigl|Marisa Miller

2009

19

Oct

Rihanna’s Pantyhose for Some New Video of the Day

Rihanna is pretty fucking cheesy. I know there was a time when I thought her futuristic dominatrix look was almost hot, but that was before she turned into a militant comic book lookin’ dyke, cuz that shit just doesn’t work for me.

Sure, a bitch who prances around in lingerie with no real shame to sell records shouldn’t be something I hate, but the truth is that to get from Barbados to the top of the music industry, getting into her lingerie hardly even scratches the surface of what she did to or is willing to do to sell records, so I want more for her.

What it comes down to is that the only eye she needs patched up is the one in her panties because there’s no way that tool to get her famous isn’t tainted, toxic or willing to stop anytime soon, when it probably should, because she is addicted to the fame and clearly wants more and more of it because being a whore is a small price to pay to get off a small island where you were still a whore, just a smalltime one. When now, you’re at the fuckin’ top…if you know what I mean….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Eye Patch|Pantyhose|Rihanna|Slut

2009

19

Oct

Tila Tequila’s Cry for Attention with her Costume Party for One Cam Show of the Day

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I am not a therapist, but I think Tila Tequila’s got some serious fucking issues.

Not only does her life seem ridiculously depressing and lonely, where she spends her days on twitter trying to seduce the thousands of people who make her think she has fans and is relevant, when really she just has dudes who want to fuck her whore body, because she is one of the worlds most successful strippers….but every once in a while she does live videos of herself half naked and in this case in costumes that 7,000 people watch, because their lives are just as pathetic as hers, and waiting around to see her naked seems to be a reasonable way to spend the night….

Sure she makes good money whoring and having pretty much no shame, and maybe there is a science behind what she is doing, you know an actual business with a team of people doing her work for her, while she just enjoys her empire and part of the marketing strategy is to make us feel like she’s lonely, desperate and hanging onto what she had as the most popular person on myspace and who really cares, I’m thinking no one, because if they did, maybe Tila wouldn’t be such a wreck.

Posted in:Camshow|Stripping|Tila Tequila

2009

19

Oct

Amanda Seyfried in Some Gym Clothes of the Day

Everyone was so excited when this bitch did a sex scene with Megan Fox, like they were going to see two hot chicks making out and they whole thing annoyed me because I thought it was a pretty weak cry for attention. Seriously, every interview with this girl was about her kissing Megan Fox and if she liked it like she was Katy Perry and based on these pics, Seyfried looks just like the lesbian I just saw hopping off her bike in ripped jeans and plain wearing a beanie outside the health food store to buy vegan supplements and a menstrual cup because tampons are so bad for you and your period offers great nutrients for your plans. The kind of lesbian who studies philosophy, enjoys tea and only eats a raw diet or pussy but only if it still has bush, because that’s nature’s fucking way…so I really don’t get what the big deal about this bitch was…but I guess it was good for her career….and here she is in some pretty stupid shorts.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Amanda Seyfried|Legs|Shorts

2009

19

Oct

Katy Perry Has a Shitty Body No Matter How Hard She Tries of the Day

Katy Perry was out having a lazy workout, because she’s a lazy girl, and the proof is in her shitty body.

I don’t know what possessed her to wear shorts that make her look like she’s in an adult diaper like the lazy bitch she is, who is too lazy to get off her ass to walk to the fucking bathroom and take a fuckin’ shit cuz it’s too much work for her, but the reality is that some of you probably like it, because you have no taste and you live in a town where everyday girls are 300 pounds thanks to America’s freedom to eat all the toxic foods you motherfuckers eat.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m fat too, but I that it is strictly because of years of hard drinking and not because of eating twinkies and that’s got nothing to do with Katy Perry or her attempt at basketball before stopping and grabbing a bagel in attempts to not burn more calories than she eats, because that’s how lazy people work and you don’t want to set that balance off, cuz look how far it’s got her…..

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Basketball|Bike Shorts|Katy Perry