When I first came to this country, I was enrolled into some Elementary school where I lived, I didn’t really fit because I couldn’t speak the language, so I don’t remember much since it was traumatic, but I do remember Lisa.

Lisa was the mother of this skinny kid with long hair, who had all these cool toys, but who everyone avoided because he was pure white trash. He dressed like a trucker, used to spit and swear and fight and smoke cigarettes and he was only 10. He would always talk about fucking and pussy and other crazy shit and was constantly being suspended. Halfway into the year, his mom came into the school to a lunch monitor, I guess to make sure he wasn’t getting into trouble, but I couldn’t really understand why the fuck the school hired her to work there, since she always dressed like a whore.

Now, I’m pretty used to seeing girls dressed in stripper gear now, but I wasn’t when I was 10, so Lisa and her spandex dresses, g-string panties, huge tits busting of her low cut shirt, hard nipples, and platform whore shoes, was something I’d look forward to. While the other kids were out playing, I’d just sit there with my little 10 year old boner staring at this platinum blonde, hoping to get a glimpse up her skirt, thinking dirty things that I didn’t really understand, like playing with those hot fucking tits.

I tried to become friends with her kid, but he was a racist, I tried to ask him if he was still breast feeding, because I knew if she was my mom, I’d never let those things go, and he’d just punch me in the face. Other kids would make fun of his mom, as if it was a negative thing to be a whore at an Elementary school, but I knew despite her being a piece of fucking trash, she was my fuckin’ dreamgirl, like Jennifer Hudson.

I like to credit Lisa for turning me into the peepin/creepy/pervert I am today, because since that year in school, the only other place I never saw a woman like that in broad daylight. I always had to go to stripclubs to get my fix and waste my money, until the day I walked into a club in my hometown and sitting across the stage from me was Lisa, smoking a cigarette, a few years older, just as trashy, and just as desperate to put food on her table, I got a lap dance from her, never told her that she was the object of my desire all these years, and the shit stain she left on my new jeans was enough to make me move on, even though it was the only time in my life that one of my dreams came true.

I assume that this kid Harvey’s going to have a lot of friends, despite not being able to function in society, because he’s retarded, and it’s all because kids know a mom like Jordan, makes an invite to the retard’s birthday worth the energy they have to put into being the retard’s friend.

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