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Lindsay Lohan in Burkini with a Hermaphrodite of the Day

Britney Spears Keeps Dancing of the Day

Salma Hayek’s Strong Jaw in a Bikini of the Day

Sydney Sweeney Does Make-Up on the Lake of the Day

RFK Jr’s Wife in a Slutty Dress of the Day

2009

Feb

Etta James Hates Beyonce and So Do I of the Day

6 Comments »

This is not going to interest you, but it interests me because I feel like I am alone in hating this Beyonce bitch. Every time I rip into her for being a waste of space, annoying, a brat, uninteresting and trying to hard to stay in the spotlight, some cunt emails me with fucking essays about how she’s a diva and a talent and the queen of the fucking world because I know she thinks she is.

So it’s nice to see that Etta James isn’t down with her either and has some sense in her and that’s all I have to say about that.

Posted in:Beyonce|Etta James

2009

Feb

Celine Dion’s Got a Panty Upskirt of the Day

7 Comments »

Sure Celine Dion’s got a bad face, her songs get under your skin and her accent makes you want to jump her in a back alley, throw her in a van and drive her deep into the wilderness, tie her to a tree, pour honey on her and hope the bears get her, but I find her hot.

The reason is not because her body is pretty tight for an old mom, it’s not even because she’s french and french girls like anal on the first date and treat sex casually like it’s supposed to be treated. It is because at 14, she realized that her vagina was her meal ticket and without it she’d just be an old french fry eating hag in small town Quebec singing at a Church choir, so she seduced her married older neighbor, probably by walking around in a bikini, showing up to his Christmas parties and torturing him by sliding her foot up his thigh under the table, until he went so fucking crazy for her little pussy that he mortgaged his house, left his family, paid off her parents, rented studio time, toured locally, making her the ridiculously famous and successful icon who he married, and who is devoted to him and who will never cheat on or report to the authorities, because they are a team and it was all because she knew how to work her her teenage pussy.

Sure that whole sex with a 14 year old is common in Quebec and it is legal so her story may not be a big deal here, but it is good enough that seeing her panties, knowing she’s only had one dick in her, and knowing her past as a teenage slut makes this bitch a whole lot fuckin’ hotter than her face lets on.

Posted in:Celine Dion|Panty Upskirt

2009

Feb

Marisa Miller Shows Fat Housewives How To Get Her Tight Body in Cosmo of the Day

3 Comments »

I am one of the few people I know who don’t think Marisa Miller should be a Victoria Secret/SI Swimsuit model because she has an old lookin’ face. Everyone gets mad at me when I say that I just don’t feel it when I see pics of her naked or half naked, they call me gay and an idiot and unrealistic because they know I’d die to fuck her, what they don’t know is that I’d die to fuck anyone at this point, dead or alive, it’s got that bad. My whole thing is bring in some new blood, you know girls who haven’t had their period for more than a couple of years, since I’ve always been told that real models are supposed to be scouted at 14 and getting huge jobs by 16, because they aren’t legal to have nude pictures of on your computer, but they are legal to masturbate to, but instead I get this 30 something fitness addict with fake tits and a tight body who is obviously hotter than the average chick, but not quite as fresh as new talent, I mean just think about how many times that pussy’s been wiped, licked, fingered, fucked to get it ahead, touched, infected, rubbed up against abrasive fabrics, inserted with vacuum cleaners to save her career from unwanted pregnancy, it is pussy that has seen better days, it is pussy I’d like to see replaced.

That said here she is showing off part of her work out regime, since her body’s really all she has left and bitch needs to make sure to keep it if she wants to be kept around, and now you can go imitate these work-out positions when jerking off, because I know you don’t agree with my opinion of her and everything she does turn you on and jerking off is better when you really get into it. O r you could just buy your wife this magazine encouraging her to get off her dumpy ass to make her worth fucking again, but that’s not going to work out for you, it’ll just make her mad, trust me I’ve tried before giving up on her. Good times.

Posted in:Cosmo|Fitness|Marisa Miller|Tight

2009

Feb

Jessica Biel Walks Her Dog of the Day

2 Comments »

Nothing screams bulldyke like a manly lookin’ bitch who likes to lift weights and who is jacked like she’s got a dick taking her tough lookin’ dog out for a powerwalk because they both like to push their limits, I mean other than being caught with a strap-on and leather chaps slamming the shit out of some fat chick and by fat chick I mean Justin Timberlake, because based on his light on his feet dance moves and angelic voice dude’s gonna have a pussy, at least that’s what all the guys I’ve met over the years who have claimed to have a “man crush” on him would like to believe, because that way they won’t feel guilty about the sexual fantasies they claim “man crushes” don’t include, when we all know they do.

Posted in:Ass|Dog|Jessica Biel

2009

Feb

Juliette Lewis in Some Mom Shorts on Set of the Day

2 Comments »

Juliette Lewis is still working and here she is on the set of something called Sympathy for Delicious. I didn’t bother looking it up because I figure it’s not going to make a difference and I am lazy, but I do know that I have mixed feelings about this girl. Part of me is disgusted by her because she looks like every cheap hooker I’ve ever seduced with a 20 dollar bill because they were desperate for whatever drug they were addicted to, but at the same time, some of my best times were spent with some of these girls, I think I may have even felt love for the first and only time with one of them. I am not going to get into it because it’s Valentines Day and I like to front like I have no soul, but I will let you know that before she died, every night we spent together was fucking magical, despite how disgusting it smelled. I guess that along with love being blind, it also has a sinus condition that makes it unable to smell too.

That said, here is some rich person, crackwhore wannabe slut on set in some trashy shorts.

Posted in:Juliette Lewis|Legs|Shorts

2009

Feb

Jordan Going for a Fake Jog of the Day

1 Comment »

If you’re wondering how Jordan keeps her slim figure, it’s definitely not by working out and staying active, it is from starving herself, suckin’ dick, plastic surgery and probably a drug addiction,or maybe her pussy’s so busted up and diseased that it’s become some kind of parasite with a metabolism of it’s own that feeds off her fat reserve, but I don’t know if that’s possible, and if it is she’d be attaching her name to it, branding it and selling her pussy juice in decorative tubs to fat chicks, because Jordan like most whores, do it all for the money.

Just don’t let these pictures of her jogging fool you, it’s a staged scene from what I assume is a reality show that I hope no one watches because her face is so doctored she looks like a fucking cartoon and here are the pics.

Posted in:Jog|Jordan|Katie Price|Reality

2009

Feb

Lady Gaga’s Gold Pants Don’t Make That Pussy a Gold Mine of the Day

3 Comments »

I love this girl’s song pokerface, but I think it needs a little re-write, you know since it’s coming from her, maybe lyrics like “Mangled Face”, “Hit by a drunk driver and dragged 10 blocks face”, “Botched Plastic Surgery Face” or maybe “I’ve found my nose, but where did my chin go face”. All this to say, she’s ugly and I don’t actually love her Pokerface song, shit is just always on the fucking radio that I know every lyric and can’t help but sing a long and that makes me hate myself more that I already do. I know I didn’t think it was possible, but I guess I can thank Lady Gaga for that.

Bonus that’s Not Really a Bonus, Here are some pictures of her in another obnoxiously stupid and fabricated weird enough to get attention outfit….

Posted in:Lady Gaga|Ugly

2009

Feb

Rihanna and Her Hot Legs Ignore the Paparazzi of the Day

1 Comment »

To think just a couple years ago, Rihanna would have been the annoying local you see when you go to all inclusive resorts soliciting you on the beach. Whether she was peddling pictures, local artifacts or crafts, or her vagina, you know that there was no white person she ignored. Now that she’s famous, she’s out being selective about who she talks to and despite the paparazzi being the scum of the fucking earth, they are the same people she’d approach and follow around when they were in town to shoot a celebrity who was in Barbados hoping to get some coverage or even a couple of dollars to feed her family a few years ago. Fame has ruined her.

Here are her legs.

Posted in:Legs|Rihanna|Shopping

2009

Feb

Lil Wayne Gets Interviewed By Katie Couric of the Day

7 Comments »

Lil Wayne did a serious interview with Katie Couric and I am posting it partially because I like Lil Wayne, I think he’s a talent, even if he’s a little lame and refers to himself as a gangster, which is something I don’t find all that gangster, because being gangster should be implied and I should have to be constantly reminded of it by a weird lookin’ soft spoken dude with a lot of ghetto tattoos. The other part of me is posting it because Katie Couric is a useless cunt. She’s condescending and it’s like she’s interviewing a fucking homeless dude about living in a bus shelter, she also makes a fool of herself when she says “the ‘tude” or “the weed”. The good news is she turns me, the real tragedy in all this is that I can’t get to see some pussy definition as her tight pants hug her in all the right ways while bowling.

Watch it.

Posted in:Interview|Lil Wayne

2009

Feb

The Black Lips Get Kicked Out of India of the Day

4 Comments »

I don’t know if you have you ever heard of the band The Black Lips. I have no idea how popular they are, but I do know that I went to one of their shows around 2 years ago and they were fucking amazing. Sure I had done a little too much bathtub GHB and drank as much as I usually do, that usually leads to blacking out, so I don’t remember much of it and truthfully, I could have been sitting in a park outside the concert all night and wouldn’t know the fucking difference, but when I listened to the album a couple weeks ago, it brought back all these memories of meeting the lead singer before the show and him being quiet and reserved and me thinking to myself that the show is going to suck, then seeing him get on stage and rock the fuck out all while spitting on people. Good times.

Either way, I got tips saying that the band got kicked the fuck out of India because one of them decided to play the guitar with his dick and that’s considered inappropriate in India. So the tour was cancelled and they fled to avoid jail time.

Sure, I don’t know why he’d want to play guitar with his dick, I’d be more inclined to throw my feces on the crowd if I was in their position like some kind of caged monkey, but then I realized they are in India and they like that kind of thing, I mean how else did they get so brown and stinky, rubbing in human feces year after year is really the only explanation.

I got some videos/mp3s/stories for you about the black lips if you’re down. I think they are worth your time and that’s why I did this post. It’s not like I get paid for this shit.

I am not racist, the guy who sells me beer is from India and he’d approve that statement. He’s told me time and time again India smells like shit and I’ve eaten Indian food and know exactly what that does to my asshole/toilet/alley I’m in. It’s all part of their shit bathing plan. Asshole.

Here’s a Video Trailer of their India Tour
GO

Here’s a Letter they Sent From India Explaining What Happened
GO

Heres one of their Tracks for You Because the Band is Good
GO

Posted in:Black Lips|India