I came across this video and I don’t understand what barn this girl grew up in, but when you’ve gotta piss, you do that shit in an alley, not a busy street where people are walking by, no matter how drunk or high you are, unless you expect to end up on the fucking internet, which I guess this bitch wasn’t and that’s why she sprinted off like the Jamaican Bobsled team in spring training. I do know that in the history of my drinking in bars, I have only seen one bitch who was homeless and on crack pull a stunt like this, all the other drunken trash I know, may not be ladies, in fact most were disgusting whores, but they did have enough common sense to piss where as few people are standing around as possible. Either way, watch the video, and Google Her…
2009
09
Jan
Lady Gaga Performs on Leno in her Pantyhose of the Day
Lady Gaga performed her Let’s Dance song on Leno, and being the modern artist she pretends to be, something a local stripper used to tell me she was every time I grabbed her tits for 10 dollars a song, she decided to wear a pair of pantyhose over a black/dark colored lacy thong. Well besides it reminding me of my mom getting ready to go to to a big meeting back in the 80s, I thought it was a pretty bold move. Not because it was daring and the censor’s probably should have cut it, but because she showed her world her big ol’ ass, something most girls try to hide.
Maybe she’s pulling the whole giving the audience everything angle, like that she’s opened her soul to us and invited us into her bedroom looking like my grandmother getting ready for church on a Sunday Morning in her skin toned pantyhose, maybe she’s trying to appeal to pantyhose fetishist, maybe she spilled something her her skirt that she was supposed to wear over her hose and got inspired thinking it was a sign from god, maybe it doesn’t matter why or how this happened and what matters is that she doesn’t take her own advice and just Dance, because if she danced a little more she’d probably be a whole lot better to jerk off to and whole lot less black guys would be swooning over her, because in case you didn’t know girls, black dudes swooning over you is a sure sign you gotta go on a diet because Black dudes love meaty bitches and by meaty I mean fat.
Either way, watch the video, take it in and count the days before Aguilera incorporates this into her act. Only to switch it up, she plans on showing off her pregnancy bulge from her loose cunt. True story.
Posted in:Lady Gaga|Leno|Panties|Performance
2009
09
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
Being sick is no fun, especially when it involves having fever induced nightmares of fat girls with assless pants and mini skirt that don’t quite cover what you’d want a mini skirt to cover on a fat chick, not that fat chick ass really bothers me that much, but it does when it’s my wife, and when everyong of these girls in my dreams turned around, she was sporting my wife’s face and a massive dick. I don’t really know what that says about me, and I don’t really want to further investigate, but I do know that sleeping is really my only alone time, so getting hit up by her in my sleep destroyed my little soul.
Here are my links from last night to start up your day.
Well, This is a Serious Turn On….
GO
Danielle Lloyd is Gettin’ Naked Again or Some Shit
GO
Carmen Electra is Heading The Way of Pam Anderson. Down, Waaaaaaay Down
GO
Because We All Need Family Time
GO
Elmo Poos Too!
GO
Weather Girl Looks Like a Real Winner, and By a Real Winner
I Mean a Complete and Utter Piece Of Shit
GO
And Here I Thought I Was The World’s Fastest Drinker
GO
Cindy is Just Plain Sexy
GO
Tribute to Girls in Football Jerseys
GO
Find Porn Here!
GO
Scarlett Johansson Wants to Put Her Tits to Good Use
GO
Extreme Tennis Camel Toe
GO
Sacrifice Your Friends for a Whopper
GO
The Southern Food Broker Corporation Super Broke Shuffle
GO
Here’s Some Sam Ronson
GO
Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO
Freida Pinto is All Over the Place and I Love It
GO
Give It Up For Kobe
GO
Alexa Loren Will Make You Cookies
GO
Taking the Racer on Ice
GO
How About Some Vintage Mini Me?
GO
Human Slingshot
GO
Louise Glover is One of a Kind
GO
Crazy Drunk Wants to Fuck With the Cops
GO
Jesus is a Friend of Mine
GO
Sluts Just Because
GO
Man Breaks Toilet Seats Over Head
GO
Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO
Babe Wakes Up
GO
Lily Allen, WTF Are You Wearing?
GO
Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO
Rosie Jones and Friends
GO
Sarah Shahi is Sexy, But Take Off Those Stupid Glasses
GO
They Make Dumpster Babies in Jersey
GO
12 Girls, 1 Tube
GO
Gravity is a Bitch
GO
He is Good With a Gun
GO
Kim K’s Ass Just Keeps Getting Better
GO
Base Jump in a Wing Suit
GO
Some Young Busty Chick Hot Self Shots
GO
ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS….
Some Asian Fetish Pussy Pics
GO
Some More of the ASian Model Posing
GO
Some Sluts on NYE Ring In the New Year Tongue Kissing…
GO
BONUS:
The 15 Hottest New Porn Stars
GO
Posted in:stepLINKS
2009
08
Jan
Lindsay Lohan in Interview Magazine of the Day
Lesbian Lohan is in the February issue of Interview Magazine. I am sure I could come up with something clever to say about these pictures, but I’ve decided to try to masturbate to them instead. I figure she needs a little dick, and if I can manage to work this limp dick into something functional is probably a great compliment to any girl. It’s actually on the same level of those miracles you see at evangelical churches, you know where the bitch on crutches walks after a preacher speaks in tongues and convulses for them like he’s channeling some kind of holy energy….I blame drinking.
Update….
I didn’t manage to finish the job, in fact, I hardly started. I sat with my pants around my ankles, my limp flesh in hand and nothing. I had to stop, I felt my neighbors’ eyes judging me because I don’t have blinds…but I figured why not share the pics with you….since that’s pretty much what I do every fucking day.
BONUS – Here’s a video of her shopping at Burberry alone and I think one of the Paparazzi calls her a bitch before asking her how the single life is treating her, even though her and Ronson are still rubbin’ cunts…..
Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Police Escort
2009
08
Jan
Steve Martin and Martin Short Body Surf With a Topless Chick of the Day
Best friends and possible lovers, Steve Martin and Martin Short were vacationing in St Barts where they decided to take a break from fucking each other’s ass like their dicks were colonoscopies and sucking each other’s sagging old age pension testicles like they were a large fleshy vagina, and do a little body surfing with a topless chick.
Raining on their Gay Pride parade was Steve Martin’s younger wife Anne Stringfield, and here she is in a bikini. That’s really all I have to say about that.
Posted in:Martin Short|Steve Martin
2009
08
Jan
The People’s Choice Happened Last Night….of the Day
So the people’s choice awards happened last night and I didn’t watch them mainly because I have a penis, or at least claim to have a penis when I can hide behind my soiled underwear. Sure, I don’t have a TV, but if I did, I wouldn’t pollute my brain with this bullshit, take that People’s Choice Awards. I really stuck it to you in this post didn’t I , you cocksucker.
Here are some pictures of some of the people who were there, not by choice, but because they had to do it for their careers…..if you’re into jerking off to bitches who are all dolled up…
The highlights of the red carpet were:
Jewel’s Fucked Up Cleavage Matches Her Teeth…..
Nikki Cox and her Fucking Weird Lips…..
Annalynne McCord Working the Camera Harder Than She Works Her Girlfriend’s Clit because She’s an Attention Whore…
Here are the rest of the sluts….
Brooke Burke’s Cleavage:
Dakota Fanning’s Dress Fighting with Puberty….
Teri Hatcher and Her Disgusting Everything….
Paris Hilton and Her Annoying Poses….
Queen Latifah and Whoever She’s Hiding In Her Lesbian Dress….
Olivia Wilde, whoever the fuck that is….
Oh and Carrie Underwood was There But I Tried to Ignore Her….
Posted in:People's Choice Awards
2009
08
Jan
Amy Winehouse is the New Nike Spokesperson of the Day
Word on the internet is that Amy Winehouse is the new spokesperson from Nike. I guess they liked that she had an emaciated body of a Kenyan runner and the lung capacity of a 75 year old chain smoker.
Sure, performance drugs are frowned upon in professional sports, but being able to pull crazy stunts, like having a professional music career, or doing cartwheels, while jacked on debilitating drugs, is considered stamina. Don’t believe what people tell you, because she is a fucking athlete, only her sport is getting high and she’s the Gold Medal winner.
I think it’s nice to see that Nike didn’t let her hard work, drive and passion to go above and beyond the average in getting high go unnoticed, but not as nice as her tits. Just do it.
Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Nike
2009
08
Jan
Nicky Hilton Buys Toilet Paper of the Day
I have no fucking shame, nothing embarrasses me anymore and I think drinking has something to do with that. When I first started up this whole alcohol abuse thing when I was a teenager, I’d feel like an asshole when I did stupid things like tried to get my friend’s girlfriend’s naked, or touching girls inappropriately, or getting in fights, I’d wake up a self hater who didn’t want to show his fucking face. Then as time went on, I got into bigger messes, made a bigger fool of myself everytime I drank than I did the time before and I’d be tearing people apart, puking, pissing, shitting fucking anything and everything you’d think you’d wake up regretting, and instead I just embraced it. There were times I couldn’t get it up for girls I was about to fuck, or times I came too fast. There were times I probably took advantage of situations and did real evil things and I just figured it was all part of life, you know normal fuck ups.
That said, over all these years there are still two things that humiliate me. The first is walking out of a public bathroom that smells like shit after taking a piss, knowing the next person in line will assume I stank it up because I am fat, so whenever that happens I catch myself justifying myself to a guy I don’t know about how I didn’t take a fucking shit despite what it may look like. The other thing is buying toilet paper. I always feel like the clerk thinks I am groundhogging/ you know ready to fucking dump as I rush to pay her for the shit and for some reason, I feel like a caged animal being watched when I just want privacy.
I have suggested to people I know to invent toilet paper vending machines, I have resorted to stealing toilet paper from public bathrooms even when I have the 3 dollars to buy a pack, I have used old socks, magazines and newspaper on my ass to avoid this shopping experience as best as I fucking can and I find it way more destructive to my self than pulling out my mini dick to fuck a chick only to have her laugh at me….
By the looks of it, Nicky Hilton and her drippy asshole don’t have the same issue as me. Instead of getting her maid to do her dirty work, she proudly parades to the world that she shits, and that she most likely has to shit as she rushes to her car to get home before it end up on her car seat and the whole thing is disgusting to me, but not as disgusting as the possibility that she’s picking this shit up for her sister’s drippy pussy.
Posted in:Nicky Hilton|Toilet Paper
2009
08
Jan
Jessica Alba And Her New Haircut Ignore Everyone Around Her of the Day
Jessica Alba has always pissed me off for various reasons. Whether it was not getting naked in movies when I bought into the hype that she was one of the hottest bitch in Hollywood, or out getting knocked up to trap her boyfriend because she’s a broken little girl who has no friends, or acting like an annoying bitch acts when you’re having a fight with her, where she gives you the silent treatment and pretends your not there like you were 6 and on the fucking playground and no matter what you say, or how hard you try to get her to crack because you still want to fight, she stares blankly past you making you more pissed off so you punch the bitch in the jaw like you were Hayden Panettiere’s dad, and bitch still stares blankly past you, only a single tear runs down her cheek, making you more frustrated so you choke her out and as she gasps for air, she finally cracks, kicks you in the balls and calls the police, where you spend the next 24 hours getting fucked up by cocks for being a wife beater, when really you were just trying to get noticed. Only Alba does that shit to the paparazzi, walking around like they aren’t there and seeing that shit pisses me off, why can’t she just be fucking personable, you know considering her career and fans have done pretty good for her, instead of pulling this cunt behavior. Sure, she probably doesn’t have much of a personality or much to say, but just giving a smile or acknowledging the scum that is around her even if they are just trying to milk what she says for personal gain, would be the nice thing to do.
If I wanted to get her attention and I was a paparazzi, I would have just slandered her, you know say screaming obscenities about her vagina and what I would do to it, something like “Hey Alba, your pussy smells like shit, I think they left the placenta in, and I want to suck it our with a fucking straw, you like that you fucking whore, don’t you” or something that hits close to home like “Don’t ignore me bitch,this the kind of cold shoulder behavior is the reason I have some pictures and video of Cash Warren getting it on with a chick who isn’t you when you were at home with the baby, wanna see?”….not that I’d ever be a paparazzi or trying to get Alba’s attention, I’m just saying…..
Posted in:Jessica Alba|New Hair