2008
03
Oct
This is the lamest fucking panty flash, even lamer than watching some girl dance on a table last night and trying to get down under her to see her bare ass shaking, only to get caught by the group of very large chachi guys she was with who didn’t find it funny and that’s why I am posting it.
Posted in:Liz Hurley|Panties
2008
03
Oct
How the fuck did Maggie Gyllenhaal ever make it into acting. She looks more like the weird girl who doesn’t shower and who ends up becoming a lonely librarian because books don’t judge her and books are always there for her when she needs them. She does not look like someone who could be the object of anyone’s desire in a movie, or in real life. She doesn’t look like a leading lady or like someone I’d even want to see on the fuckin’ screen and I guess it takes a whole lot of movie magic to make her someone the general public can stomach, like it took a whole lot of deep throat magic to get her where she is today, not because saying ugly girls suck dick to the top is a cliche, but because all girls suck dick to get to the top, the ugly ones just suck a little fucking harder…….
Posted in:Maggie Gyllenhaal|Monster|Ugly
2008
03
Oct
Willa Holland is some LA hipster who I heard goes to all the hipster parties and is friends with all the rich hipster kids and when she’s not in the cocaine line for the bathroom, she’s acting. She played Micha Barton’s younger, hotter and sluttier sister on The O.C. and now it seems like she’s made the giant leap to Gossip Girl, which is the New York version of The O.C. for those of you who aren’t up to speed on these things.
I don’t know why she’s wearing mismatched shoes, I don’t know why she’s wearing elaborate hoisery and I guess I really don’t give a fuck because it’s the end of the fucking week and I want to fuck her.
Posted in:Pantyhose|Willa Holland
2008
03
Oct
If you’ve been wondering what Jojo Levesque has been up to the last few years, it turns out she’s been fucking giant stuffed animals and as weird as that may be, I am sure you’ve done or jerked off to a lot weirder. Like the time you went on that fishing trip with your buddies and though it would be funny to shove you dick in the freshly caught trout, or the time you made your own vagina out of a bowl of warm pasta, or the time you spent a week crafting a sex machine, that you had no one to use it with, so you borrowed the neighbor’s dog…you get what I am trying to say here….you are a sick fuck and that’s the end of that.
Posted in:cleavage|JoJo|Uncategorized
2008
03
Oct
Blake Lively is the star of one of those teen targeted shows that ends up turning them into materialistic, money grubbing, wallet fucking, gossiping, scenester, bottle whore sluts called Gossip Girl that I have never seen but know it has that kind of power because teenagers are pretty easy to influence. I know that people have been giving her all kinds of credit for being hot, but I just don’t see it and figured I’d post these pictures of her just to say that and to say that I am a pretty big asshole. A group of kids were in the back alley behind my shit hole apartment and were doing some kind of lame teenage drug deal and were smoking what was probably one of their first joints and were looking over their shoulder constantly to see if anyone was going to catch them and arrest them and just when they decided to get comfortable, I pulled out my camera and snapped off the flash, making them all panic and run, while I sat at my command center laughing to myself, that may have nothing to do with Blake Lively, but I heard them say they can’t wait to go home and watch the new episode of Gossip Girl that they TIVOed, so maybe it does.
Posted in:Blake Lively|Kissing
2008
03
Oct
So Puff is a ratty motherfucker who makes far too much money and tries to be down with the people by running his video blog where he preaches his shit and since this is the internet, I’ve got no real issue with that. I never watch the videos because I don’t think dude’s interesting enough to listen to, I also don’t think he’s funny but I do think there is some serious hypocrisy, when dude is allowed to post clips from Good Morning America within his video, while people like me get hit up with lawyers letters almost on a daily basis for posting shit we see on TV, or on the internet. Not to mention Diddy is probably right there with the RIAA on taking down piracy and arresting innocent people or illegal music downloads, because it’s out of his fucking pocket, but probably illegally downloading movies and music all the fuckin’ time when making shitty videos with copyrighted material from other people like Good Morning America. It is annoying and that’s all I have to say about that.
Posted in:P. Diddy|Puff Daddy
2008
03
Oct
So I don’t know what the booze did to me last night but it definitely left me brain chemically unbalanced today. I woke up with a smile, I walked around outside with a smile, I am giggling like a fucking group of homos watching Project Runway, or whatever it is that homos watch that make them giggle and I don’t really know what it is. I laughed when this hot girl told me my shirt made me look poor because it is a tourist shirt that says Los Angeles on it from god knows where and I got a real kick out of that, I laughed when another girl looked at me with disgust when I was checking out her ass in white sweat pants. I even laughed when some old man farted in line next to me, when I’d normally call him disgusting or something. I’ve just been on a high all fuckin’ day, maybe it’s a manic episode, but according to various psych evaluations, I am not bi-polar, maybe it’s just what not giving a fuck and just being satisfied with life and the funny things it throws our way, instead of being tightly wound and miserable. Who really knows, but it fells pretty fucking good, I should drink more often, Then I saw this ad Perez Hilton did for The Gap and it made me want throw in the towel and end it all, just like that my flowery, sunshine day turned to shit because I was reminded that those who are useless and don’t deserve fans, like the cast of The Hills and Perez, have idiots buying into their shit and corporations bank rolling them because they think they are what people like, giving them the exposure that makes the people who don’t know any better, learn about them and increase their stock value and it makes no fucking sense to me.
Posted in:Gap|Perez Hilton
2008
03
Oct
Here are some older pictures of Christina Milian flashing the world her pantyless pussy, unfortunately, the camera guy was a fucking asshole and he missed the fuckin’ meat. This is like making a pie without putting the filling in it, or like driving without a car, or like trying to finger a girl despite having no arms. I don’t really know what I am saying, but I am definitely writing nonsense and you don’t deserve that, but I don’t feel like I deserve these cockteasing pictures. Sure, Milian is pretty irrelevant now, but pussy is fuckin’ pussy and if I took the attitude towards all washed up girls, where I seemingly moved on from them with their popularity dwindling and their careers and beauty fading, I would still be a fuckin’ virgin, because if you saw my roster, or the slopholes that made the notches on this very large belt, you’d know that I don’t think I am too good for shit…seriously….if shit was shaped like a pussy in one of those Miracle From God ways like the time the Grilled Cheese had the Virgin Mary’s Likeness toasted on it, I’d totally fuck it.
Posted in:Christina Milian|Panties
2008
03
Oct
Here is a video of Lohan pleading with the paparazzi to not record in her house, it’s the same kind of pleading she gets when Samantha pulls out the 6 inch dolphin shaped dildo, when Lohan’s made it clear she likes the 13 inch black cock shaped dildo. I get it, bad gay jokes are played the fuck out, boring to read, and are a weak lazy attempt at a post, but bad gay jokes in everyday life are funny. Last night some guy was hustling my stepdaughter outside that bar we were drinking at, he was trying to get her home and to make it seem less obvious, he invited me and a group of guys to his after party at his apartment and I answered by telling him that I am not really into homo shit, and dude went nuts and tried to fight me because I guess inviting drunk men to his place at 4 in the morning seems pretty hetero to him.
Posted in:LA|Lindsay Lohan
