I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

27

Jun

Cheryl Burke has an Upskirt Getting Out of the Car of the Day

This is some Dancing With The Stars chick who isn’t on the show anymore, but that doesn’t stop her from showing off her dance moves. I think she calls this one the Vagina in Panties Dancing Out of Cars Shuffle or some shit. She’s not hot, she’s not relevant and all she’s doing is showing off her panties and that makes me jealous. I wish life was as easy for me, I’d have no problem flashing a little skin, or my underwear to land jobs and make money for it, instead when I flash a little skin, I make people throw-up.

Speaking of throwing up, I was walking around aimlessly last night and saw a real live pussy in the flesh that didn’t belong to my wife, and it was fucking remarkable. This drunk girl was squatting outside the club she obviously drank too much at, and was puking everywhere as her friends held her hair. I stopped to point and laugh about it and when I looked the girl over, her pussy was glaring back up at me. I am convinced the fuckin’ thing winked at me. Too bad for you, I don’t own a camera.

Posted in:Cheryl Burke|Upskirt

2008

27

Jun

The Co-Star of the Mini Me Sex Tape of the Day

I was always about equal opportunity fucking. I figure that sex is a good thing and that everyone, despite their social inadequacies should be able to find someone to fuck. That was until I heard about the Mini Me sex tape. Truth is that I was trying to ignore this shit like it was a bad nightmare that it is and decided that somethings are better left ignored, but when I saw pictures of the slut in the video and listened to her radio show I had no choice but to post about it because this girl is an opportunist Jew trying to make it in Hollywood and this is her strategy and I feel for the poor little midget guy that got sucked into this because he just wanted to get laid and the only way he could get it was by promising her the exposure she wants.

I can assume that the first and only celebrity who spoke to her and was willing to fuck her, because lets face it, up until this point the only sex dude’s been getting is with hookers, was a midget/dwarf/monster who is hardly a celebrity and she decided that this will be her big break and by big I mean desperate attempt to have a break that will make her stick out from the other girls with the same dreams as her.

What she doesn’t realize is that this isn’t going to make her career, it is going to ruin any chance of having a career, because having a sex tape when you are a rich socialite with some other rich cokehead is one thing, while having sex with a mutant is in a whole other thing, a thing that disgust pretty much everybody in the fucking world, all while bringing hope to midgets/dwarves/mutants everywhere.

Either way, this is a sex tape that you will probably jerk off to because you always had a thing for the whole idea of having a miniature version of yourself to make your masturbating a lot more interesting and less lonely than it already is, but I am sure this is going to be a huge hit to your ego when you realize that Mini Me is more hung than you.

Her name is Ranae Something Jewish and here are her pics and radio interview, one that tells a girl’s tale of poverty, desperation and dreams of grandeur leading her into a very dark place with a very scary creature who promised to make those dreams a reality…. I was going to call this post What Won’t a Jew do for Money, but didn’t.


Listen to the Interview With this Bitch
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Posted in:Mini Me|Sex Tape|Star

2008

27

Jun

Audrina Patridge and Her Fake Tits of the Day

Audrina has caught on that showing off her fake tits get her attention and help her stand out amongst her co-stars and make a name for herself and for a simple spoiled brat from an upper middle class family who had a dream of being in Playboy and the means to get fake tits, that means a lot. Most of the girls I know with implants just had them done to make more money stripping, but it turns out that they were just selling themselves short and all it takes is a dream.

Posted in:Audrina Patridge|Fake Tits

2008

27

Jun

Jennifer Lopez and Her Milk Tits of the Day

I hate Jennifer Lopez. I hated her in Selena and hoped the president of her fan club shot her instead, but some how she worked her way into the limelight and I think it had to do with the media lying about how hot she was, because I have eyes and I see nothing hot about her. The media went on and on about her J.Lo booty and she aggressively pushed that hispanic movement bullshit, making her more hispanic than the rest of her family because she considered herself a decent actress and could imitate real hispanic people. The real issue with J.Lo is that throughout her shitty music career that made her rich, her stupid clothing company that gave fat chicks who can’t afford Juicy Couture their own kind of velour suit to wear, through the years dating Diddy rockin’ guns and Afleck rockin’ really shitty movies and into her mature relationship with fellow spic Mark Anthony, she never had a set of tits, but she does now and I’d say shit balanced out that ass of hers but the reality is that when she gave birth her vagina beat her tits to the punch and now J.Lo finally makes sense.

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez|Milk|Tits

2008

27

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

I saw some cunt given a free ice cream for her birthday at some ghetto restaurant I went to with my wife because she insisted. I kept staring at her table becauase it was her birthday and she was there with her family and her mom happened to have the biggest, perkiest tits any 60 year old I had ever seen had. Either way, the bitch gets her birthday ice cream and sends it back for more strawberries or some shit, which I thought was a little presumptuous considering we were pretty much eating in the fucking gutter but the waiter complied and when he came back with her ice cream a little more jacked on fruit, she sent it back again for chocolate sauce. Now, I don’t know about you but a ghetto bitch sending back her ice cream once is more than enough cunt behavior, but this cunt went did it twice and that is insane. In the girls defense, she was about 50 pounds overweight and someone you’d expect to take her ice cream pretty fucking seriously, because if she didn’t she’d probably be skinny. I thought it was a good enough story to post, but since it’s not that good, I’ll throw up some links to distract you from the bore that is me. Easy.

The Mini Me Sex Tape Clip Offends the Fuck Out of Me
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Open Wide Cheryl Burke and Show Us That Pussy
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Imogen Thomas is Watching Her Car
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Jessica Simpson’s Got Some Shitty Fucking Cleavage But We’d All Still Fuck Her
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Cameron Diaz’s Cry for Attention
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Martha Higareda Panty Upskirt
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Sesame Street Hires a Slut Muppet
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10 Hottest Celebrity Cougars
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Pam Anderson’s Taking Off Her Shirt Cuz Her Tits are Going to Be on Big Brother Australia
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Web Sluts Are The Best Type of Sluts to Have Cuz They Don’t Know Where You Live….
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Natasha Nice is Everything You Want in a Women
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Ashley Tisdale Looking More Jailbait Than Ever
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The Chick Who Fucked Mini Me in His Sex Tape
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Cheat at Roulette, Make Some Money, Then Give It To Me
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Cindy Margolis New Playboy Pics
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How NOT to Do a Flaming Shot
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Fun at the Mall
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Lucy Clarkson Gallery
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Find Girls to Fuck, Because You Can’t Be Mommy’s Special Little Guy Forever
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Old Disgusting Woman Decides to Take a Dump in Public
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Lenna’s Pink surprise
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Monique is Your Dream Date
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Hot Asian Dances For the Camera
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John Mayer Proves, Yet Again, That He Is an Idiot
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Jane Krakowski Puts on a Hard Hat and Pretends She Knows About Construction
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Brooke Hogan Looks Kind of Hot in the New Issue of Maxim, and By Kind of Hot I Mean Not Like a Man
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Angelina Jolie Looks Super Hot in Wanted
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Dorm Daze Photoshoot Will Make You Horny
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Knob Hockey is a Type of Hockey I’m Sure You Will Enjoy
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Stop the Press! Mary Kate Olsen is SMILING!
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Don’t Die a Virgin, Use This to Get Laid
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SKinny Dipping Fun
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Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?
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No, You Are Not a Ninja
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Bree Olsen Sun Tans Naked
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Naked White Crackwhores Are the Best Kind of Crack Whores
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Bedroom Ass Shaker
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Boy George Got Into the Country After all
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Nicole Graves Washed Her Car
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Find The Best Porn on the Net, Period
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Paulina Rubio is Oh So Fine
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Kimora Lee is Preety Fucking Unreasonable
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Adabel Guerrero is in Argentina’s Maxim. Naked
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Pee Pee Firehouse
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Marisa Miller’s Legs Around Town
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Sluts Who Know How to Get the Job Done
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Stripper Dykes Caught on Camera
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Roller Derby Girls are Fucking Scary Looking
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Economics – Meet Hot Chicks
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Hot Chicks Doing Random Things
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Ashely’s Husband Want’s to Share the Wealth
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ROGUE COLLECTOR SAYS “PHOTOBUCKET’S JUST ANOTHER PORN SITE”
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BONUS – Club Sluts Who Won’t Give You The Time of Day
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

27

Jun

Heidi Montag Denies Til She Dies of the Day

Heidi Montag was asked about her fake tits and nose job and basically said she got it done because of insecurities that have always followed her from being teased as a kid. This gives teaches a strong lesson to kids everywhere, and by everywhere I mean the small percentage of her fans that aren’t autistic or retarded, and that lesson is that if you are being teased by other kids, the other kids are right, so go out and fix whatever they’ve told you to so you can fit in. You hear that black kid in the corner, it’s going to be hard but you’re just going to have to turn yourself white…and gay dude, we know how much you love home economics class where you get to make your favorite dresses, but motherfucker you are going to have to join the fucking football team and stand a little straighter because that’s what Heidi Montag told us.

It’s really unfortunate that she doesn’t take her own advice about other aspects of her life, sure you call her Kate Hudson and she goes and gets implants, or a Dirty Jew with that big ‘ol Dirty Jew nose and she get her nose done, but for some reason no matter how useless I call her, how many times I laugh at her song, her career, her relationship, her show, you’d expect her to just put an end to it all by putting a gun to her head. I guess I am just not as relevant as the pretty girls in her middle school.

Either way, the highlight of this clip is how she says she doesn’t drink or do drugs twice in a matter of minutes, it’s one of those if you tell me enough times I’ll start to believe her bullshit, but that didn’t work when my wife told me she lost weight so I’d give her the potato chips and it’s not going to work now. There is no way you can live as Heidi Montag andd not be on drugs without hurting yourself.. It would seriously take me about 15 minutes of being Heidi Montag before jumping off the 7th story window of the Chateau Marmont and those 15 minutes don’t count because I’d be masturbating and playing with my fake tits and I’d bring that Spencer cunt down with me.

Posted in:Heidi Montag|The View

2008

26

Jun

Michelle Huziker Bikini Ass Pictures of the Day

This is some Model who I’ve never heard of and who is less important than the girl who works at your local drug store, but that’s just because she hands out Methodone, HIV Cocktails, Valtrex and Birth Control to the people while all this girl does is prance around in her ass leading the public to need HIV Cocktails, Valtrex and Birth Control to deal with the poor decisions they make after getting horny from hanging out on the internet watching porn.

Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Huziker

2008

26

Jun

Brooke Hogan Does Maxim of the Day

Brooke Hogan brought her muscles to Maxim for this boring photoshoot. I can only assume that Hulk paid them to give her the press for her birthday or that Maxim are slowly going bankrupt because no one buys magazines and are taking what they can get.

Her dad showed up on the set of the shoot to make sure she doesn’t show off too much skin, apparetly he’s like a jealous boyfriend who doesn’t want other men to appreciate the luscious curves he’s been appreciating since she hit puberty. I remember a dude I knew who would go nuts when his chick tanned topless in front of me, he thought it was the end of the fucking world that I knew what her tits looked like and that if I wanted to, I could jerk off to them knowing exactly what he was playing with everynight. I feel like this Hulk control issues stem from the same evil green monster.

Posted in:Brooke Hogan|Maxim

2008

26

Jun

Tiffany Trump is Fucking Ugly of the Day

There’s a reason why you haven’t heard much about Donald Trumps daughter Tiffany, and that is because he keeps her hidden and a secret because she’s fucking ugly. Trump likes to equate his name to excellence and luxury and prestige but instead fate has brought him something to brand that represents birth defects, bad genetics and a busted down fucking face.

It’s kinda funny that a cocksucker like Trump who has probably fucked over numerous people because he is a true believer that business is business and it’s nothing personal would get struck by Karma and his sperm would create this monster of a girl but I guess that’s just how the world works. The worst thing about this is that the worst thing about her probably isn’t even her face, because if she’s anything like other rich girls, she’s proababy a cunt and actually thinks she’s got it going on in typical rich kid delusion as she rides her prize winning horses, wears her designer clothes and travels to places of luxury while taking time off her very high society education to make a point of treating everyone around her like they are shit.

I almost felt bad ripping into this girl, because she’s a teenager and the last thing she needs to read about on the interenet is how weird her face is, and how ugly she is, you know, giving her a complex and landing her in some kind of therapy session or on some kind of meds or into a life a many random sexual encounters to make her feel like she has some value, but then I realize that ripping into people is what I do and business is business, nothing personal.

Posted in:Marla Maples|Tiffany Trump|Ugly

2008

26

Jun

Coleen McLoughlin Honeymoon Bikini Pictures of the Day

Here’s yet another dumpy chick from the UK in her bikini, not because all chicks from the UK are Dumpy, but because she’s married to a soccer player and with this whole Euro shit going on, I can’t leave my house without running into some fucking immigrant carrying his team’s flag and it’s starting to annoy me.

What doesn’t really annoy me is the fact that soccer players land the trashiest girls out there, they are like the pussy you fuck when you are out of town on business and you leave the wife at home with the kids and feel like it’s time for new pussy and conveniently a drunk girl in a messed up party dress on the verge of passing out or throwing up falls up on you and mistakes you for her boyfriend who was actually just a random dude from the same bar the previous week who had his way with her, but she doesn’t know the difference, her timelines are all messed up and she’s been this drunken mess for the past 6 years so she ends up showing you the same good time she’s shown many men. But for some reason, one night while out, they win the fucking lottery and some rich soccer playing dude falls in love with them because she gives a better blowjob than his teammates and next thing you know, you’re honeymooning in Vegas, showing the world your fat ass that is only going to get fatter. It’s really one of life’s great mysteries.

Posted in:Bikini|Coleen McLoughlin|Honeymoon