Bikini Archives - Page 26 of 93 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2009

28

Jul

Leticia Birkheuer in a Hot Bikini on the Beach of the Day

I don’t know how my site turned into strictly a bikini stalking site, like the place where every useless no name cunt I can find in a bikini gets posted, but I’m starting to get nervous thinking about what I am going to do when summer is over and bitches start wearing sweaters.

I’m gonna be fucked. It’ll be the end of me and I won’t know what to do with myself, but that’s probably a bad thing for society cuz this site keeps me off the streets, but maybe that’ll be a good thing for my reader who is in desperate need of a life, and the death of this site, may just be thing thing to give him that kick in the ass to get his fucking shit together, just not as good of a thing as this bitch Leticia Birkheuer’s bathing suit bottoms….which in this case aren’t that good of a thing because the ass it is on. I’ve seen better ass on a 12 year old, and this bitch claims to be Brazilian and a model? Well and ass like that is enough evidence for me that either she’s retired or someone out there’s lying to me….

Either way, decide for yourself….

Posted in:Bikini|Leticia Birkheuer|Model

2009

28

Jul

Elisabetta Canalis is George Clooney’s Italian Girlfriend of the Day

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Here is George Clooney’s new Italian girlfriend, she was born in 1978 so I guess that makes her too old for me to wanna fuck, but too young for Clooney to date without looking like some kind of pervert who only fucks young hot pussy. At first I thought that she was some local girl who he met in a cafe eating pasta or whatever the fuck they do in Italy, who won her a Clooney and calls all her friends to brag about how she is the vagina to some big American star, but it turns out she’s some actor and model and TV host who is obviously trying to make it in the USA and the best way to get seen is to date a famous person, especially one everyone keeps tabs on who he is stickin his dick inside and since Hollywood is all about money and business deals, I’m sure Clooney owns the rights to her and is gettin’ paid out of this.

Either way here’s a retrospective (ha) of some of her work….

I have done some posts on her in the past, I knew I recognized the whore’s name because it rhymes with anus…and here they are if you are interested….think of it as a retrospective of my work…on this no name Italian….

Elisabetta Canalis in a Brown Bikini
Elisabetta Canalis in a Pink Bikini
Elisabetta Canalis in an Almost Nipple Slip
Elisabetta Canalis in Desperate Need of a Bikini Wax
Elisabetta Canalis in another Bikini

Posted in:Bikini|Elisabetta Canalis|George Clooney

2009

27

Jul

Slow Day in News in LA of the Day

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If you thought LA was a flakey piece of shit before watching this video, now you’ll be pretty confident about it because last Friday some morning show sent one of their morning show girls, who I think I may have written about before saying something along the lines of her moving to LA hoping for a career and only landing a local morning show and doing everything she can to escape that before it’s too late and becomes her life, and here she is in a segment I don’t quite understand, but involves her and her fuckin’ bikini goin down a waterslide and motherfuckers spend close to three minutes on this….provin that LA’s fuckin’ weird…

Here is a second clip from Friday’s Good Day LA morning show and it is with Katherine Heigl and she is talking about her vibrating panties and having orgasms….something disgusting to some and pornographic to others but worth watching for all….

Posted in:Bikini|Los Angeles Morning Show

2009

27

Jul

Tara Reid in a Yellow Bikini of the Day

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My favorite piece of dried up leather, and I am talking about her pussy, is still in her bikini, just though I’d give you the heads up because it brings great joy to me, especailly because it is yellow and reminds me of a big ray of sunshine on a day I don’t want sunshine, because I am stranded in a desert with no water after a drinking binge led me there, you know something I’m not begging for, but something I’m willing to accept because it is jus the way it fuckin’ is, even though it will probably be the death of me.

Posted in:Bikini|Tara Reid

2009

27

Jul

Elisabetta Gregoraci in a Bikini With Her Billion Dollar Tits of the Day

8 Comments »

When you are an old fat billionaire you not only get to fuck young tight bodied wonderbra models, but you get to marry them and cheat on them with even younger tighter models, while the original young tight wonderbra model won’t do shit about it, because she’s hooked on the lifestyle and you were smart enough to sign a prenup leaving her nothing, not that you’d want to fuck other pussy with this laying in your bed everynight, and by not wanting to fuck other pussy I mean, all pussy gets boring, even if it is attached to the hottest body, because guess what bitches, no matter who they are, get fuckin’ annoying, and new bitches keep shit fresh, especially when you have the old ball and chain at home waiting for you as a back-up in the event the new one isn’t as good as she is proving yet again that being a billionaire makes for a good fuckin’ life.

Posted in:Bikini|Body|Elisabetta Gregoraci|Flavio Briatore

2009

27

Jul

Some Bitch Named Tamara Beckwith in a Bikini of the Day

2 Comments »

I don’t know who this bitch is but she is in a bikini and when you wear a bikini and you are important enough for the paparazzi to take a picture of you, I have no choice but to put you on the site, even if you’re old and weathered and have no need to wear a bikini because you’re just nipples and built like a 12 year old boy, and last time I checked Michael Jackson was dead, and when he died, the world no longer had a need for 12 year old boys to be wearin bikinis anymore, not that I have any issues with small tits, but I do have an issue with any tit covered the fuck up.

If you wanna find out more about this bitch, google her name and you will probably find all you’ve ever dreamt you could find about her.

Posted in:Bikini|Tamara Beckwith

2009

27

Jul

Tara Reid Is Amazing in a Bikini of the Day

4 Comments »

Maybe I am horny and tired of fat chicks who share a bed with me every fuckin’ night, but I think Tara Reid looks pretty fucking amazing. Maybe it’s her tan that distracts me from the fact that she’s dying on the inside from being on an alcohol and coke diet the last 10 years, or maybe it’s the fake tits, sloppy lipposuction job and bony ass that make her hot to me because girls who are dying on the inside are usually a fetish of mine, I mean that’s why I spend my hard earned money I steal from my wife on blowjobs from bitches with crazy addictions, but maybe that’s just because I can afford them. So in a lot of ways Tara Reid is the crackwhore who escaped being a crackwhore, the kind of crackwhore who made enough money so that she doesn’t have to sleep on park benches or wear the same panties for four days while lookin’ for dick to suck for more crack, she did is a crackwhore with a retirement plan, but a vagina that still looks and smells like a crackwhore, making her the idea crackwhore bride, making the dude she’s with the luckiest guy in the world.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Tara Reid

2009

24

Jul

Some Bikini Fashion Show of the Day

Comments Off on Some Bikini Fashion Show of the Day

I don’t know much about fashion and I don’t know much about bikinis. I just know that I don’t see nearly enough of them in my everyday life, because this city sucks and is not on a beach, and I suck and can’t afford to be on a beach, so I’m forced to turn to shitty quality runway pictures of sluts strutting their shit in bikinis, when really my face should be the fuckin runway, and their pussies be fuckin’ landin’ on it.

I guess there’s no real information in this post. No fashion designer name….so that if you want to go out and buy one you can’t and I guess that’s all part of me making this site even more useless than it is….Enjoy.

Posted in:Bikini

2009

22

Jul

Naomi Watts in Shitty Mom Bikini Pictures of the Day

2 Comments »

There’s nothing like pictures of a new mother in a bikini to remind you that having kids is a fucking mistake and that when you are stupidly knocked up because you think that is what you are meant to do, or because you are trying to keep a motherfucker in lock down and it is the only way he’ll keep talking to you, or because you are religious and think that it God intended you to have the fuckin’ thing, get an abortion and I am not just saying that because I am working a business plan for funeral services for abortions and marketing the shit outside the aboriton clinic, I am saying it because look at what not getting an abortion does to your ass…

Posted in:Bikini|Mom|Naomi Watts

2009

22

Jul

Some Slut Named Patrizia Daddario Erotic Photoshoot of the Day

6 Comments »

I didn’t know who this bitch was – so I googled it….

Over seven pages in the Spanish magazine Interviu, Patrizia D’Addario poses in a series of see-though tops alongside a swimming pool at a villa in Rome.
Little more than a stone’s throw away is the Palazzo Gravioli, the Rome residence of Silvio Berlusconi. It was inside the walls of the Palazzo where the blonde escort claims she slept with the Italian Prime Minister.

You’d think the Italian Prime Minister would have a little better taste and if he was to bang a whore, he’d do one that was worth banging, not that all women aren’t worth banging, just when you are in a position of power you can leave the table scraps for the rest of us, instead of giving the table scraps some kind of ego, when that ego should be reserved for models. Motherfucker’s screwing up the whole chain of fuckin’ command….

Here are those pics…

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