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Archive for the Lindsay Lohan Category

2010

05

Jan

Lindsay Lohan Proves Suicide Scars are the New Sad and Sexy Accessory of the Day

Here’s Lohan showing us the new sexy trend and that’s suicide scars. I don’t know why she’s traded in her vagina slips and slutty behavior in for suicide scars, but I do know they are fucking sexy. Maybe I’m weird for liking survival from self-induced stupidity led on by self-absorbed selfishness brought on by a mean lesbian girlfriend, a bad family and a career that’s gone to shit, despite having tons of money and having had more celebrity or fame than most ever will, because at the point she’s at, the money doesn’t matter, she’s so self involved to step outside of that and realize how idiotic she is, because she’s just a whiney little bitch with nothing better to do than show cry-for attention level mental disorders. Real mental cases actually go thru with the shit, they don’t call suicide hotlines for help, they just hate themselves enough to end themselves, unlike Lohan who loves herself so much she just wants others to love her too, so she does this cry for attention.

The whole thing is such a turn on, but only cuz I like broken birds with fat tits and enough money to pay my bar tab and leather pants…so if 2009 was the year of death according to all the faggot magazines that try to find trends in uninteresting things to have a “Story”, I’m gonna predict 2010’s gonna be a lot worse….

Let’s hope Tila Tequila takes the steps Lohan takes to be with her wife in heaven like she wants so much, only she doesn’t stop at just a scratch….but this is about Lohan and she’s making Suicide Scars the new porn…but in Suicide Scar defense, I have a think for Lohan and everything she does is fuckin’ sex, even when she shits, but that’s only cuz Lohan shitting is a rare event, not eating kinda does that to you and here are the pics…..

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Suicide Scars

2010

04

Jan

Lindsay Lohan and Her Sister in their Bathing Suits of the Day

There was a time Lohan was desperate enough to answer my text messages and emails. Those days are long gone and it hurts my feelings that she didn’t have the decency to break up with my, she just stopped answering me and it makes jerking off to her a very sad experience, but after lookin’ at these pics, it may not be because I’m emotionally shaken by being dropped, but more to do with how she looks. I’d still do her though…just putting that out there in case she’s desperate for a fat old man’s limp pathetic dick, I figure with the whole lesbian shit, a dick that looks like a clit would be a solid transition back to taking cock….here she is with her sister….

Lindsay Lohan is So Fancy Trying on Luis Vuiton Bathing Suits….that I hope the Store Burns before Another Bitch Slides into the shit….

Lindsay Lohan is Still Confindent Enough to Wear a 2 Piece…Kinda Like that Sloppy Ex-Hooker Who Pretty Much Gave Up on Life and No Longer has any Shame….and I Like it….because she’s not fat…and I hate fat chicks…

Pics via Bauer
Pics via INF

Posted in:Ali Lohan|Bikini|Lindsay Lohan

2009

29

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Tits in a Hypnotizing Dress of the Day

I don’t really know what shirt/dress Lohan is wearing, but staring at her tits is making me dizzy, like how they hynotize a motherfucker in Batman or some shit, possibly her final desperate attempt to get work and to work her way into our minds, and I guess it worked on me…..

I had a really weird sex dream involving Lohan that involved her naked ass, a bucket of KFC chicken, a bathtub full of gravy and a marker we used to play connect the herpes scars. It was fucking weird, but I work up with a boner, so maybe the key to my libido is fast food and easy celebrity haggard under 25 year old pussy. I guess I still have love for Lohan even though everyone else has given up on her and here are some recent pics because she fucked me so proper in my dream last night that I figure I should give her as much exposure as possible, just so it gets back to her and she knows I still care….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Sweater|Tits

2009

24

Dec

All I want for Christmas is Lohan to Send Me a Text Message of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is a bad santa. Let’s hope she doesn’t try to work for the make-a-wish foundation, or even to hit up all the homeless shelters or sick kid hospitals this Christmas for attention cuz she’s a bad fucking santa….

All I asked her for was to send me a couple nude pics and instead she just pretended I don’t exist, because in her world I don’t, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt me on the inside when I sat by my phone while sugar plims danced in my head, waiting for a response, especially when I see these pictures of her so actively and passionately texting some other motherfucker who is proabbly more relevant than me, but I like to think she’s just doing it to mock me knowing she ignored me and driving that point home.

Sure at first I thought maybe she was too busy getting her lips done to use her phone, then I thought that maybe she was doing me a favor because she knows her vagina’s a mess and something not worth seeing and that not sending me nudes a Christmas Miracle in disguise….and it really doesn’t matter cuz she’s in 5 years no one will even remember who Lohan is…..

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Chirstmas|Lindsay Lohan|Text

2009

22

Dec

Lindsay Lohan is Swimsuit Santa of the Day

I like to consider Lindsay Lohan a horrible friend of mine. Partially because we’re not friends, but also because she doesn’t answer me when I reach out to her. I figured that like so many other people, I could ride her name and become more popular and make more money than her, which isn’t saying much because I think she made a total of 200 dollars in 2009. I guess this Santa hat is a fucking lie and she’s really not generous at all, it’s just a fucking act or a cry for fucking attention, hoping to get noticed and have people remember her going into 2010, all in efforts of making a comeback and turning it all around, but I doubt that’s possible, she’s not talented enough, she fucked herself over and got all caught up in herself…so the only gift she brings with her this holiday spirit is not hope for a better tomorrow but instead a demanding spoiled cunt attitude abusive towards her friends who ride her coat tails, a whole lot of prescription pills and a solid strain of herpes…and Lindsay, if you’re reading this, which I know you aren’t, despite you faking Newsweek in these pics, I’m still waiting for me xmas gift…..

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|swimsuit

2009

21

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Still Topless for Muse of the Day

Lohan is really getting a lot of airplay for this photoshoot. I haven’t seen so much Lohan coverage since she flashed her pussy years ago. It’s like every week this bullshit hipster fake art magazine releases another shot of her tits and all the virgin blogs go nuts for the shit, even though Lohan’s been done for a long fucking time and even if she released niche fetish videos like fucking used tampons or getting her ear cummed in or whatever the hot new porn trends are, I would have bet most people wouldn’t care. I guess I was wrong and there’s still more Lohan to be had, unless of course she dies of cardiac arrest or other “natural causes” before that time comes….and it doesn’t really matter because she has great tits…that I would want to use like I was Muse to get noticed…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|muse|Topless

2009

11

Dec

Lindsay Lohan and Phony Artistic Topless Video for a Shitty Magazine of the Day

I can’t beleive I missed this bullshit video starring Lindsay Lohan in some sleazy soft core student film shit, but I like to think it’s because no one gives a fuck about Lindsay Lohan and this college film student’s phony artistic crap. I don’t know how the fuck she got herself into this, or why the fuck she thought this shit was a crucial career move cuz she no longer has a career, but apparently you can see nipple and I guess all nipples deserve the chance to be in video, no matter how big or how small, how useless or how desired, I really just want to see them all…it’s my life work….at least that’s what I’ve decided my life work is going to be starting today, so girls turn your webcam’s on.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Topless

2009

09

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Nipple for Some Magazine of the Day

Lohan may not have much of a career. She may not have too much sex appeal. She may not really be interesting to the media. But she does have great fucking tits. I am upset that the one night I had with Lohan, these tits weren’t shoved down my throat, but instead, fate had a different plan for me as I was escorted out of the VIP section of the club she was doing an appearance at by very big security guards who were nice enough to not break my camera or face for a change….

Either way, check out here tits. They are pretty incredible….

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Nipples

2009

07

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Cry for Attention of the Day

Lohan is really trying to stay relevant in the art and fashion scene since the mainstream celebrity scene turned its back on her when she went dyke, which the art and fashion scene gets boners for faggots, but I think it’s safe to say that if a magazine, like Muse for example, says that they are THE “Fashionart Magazine, they are obviously pretty full of shit, like Lady Gaga calling herself an artistic performer and the followers believing her bullshit, but at least they managed to trick Lohan into getting naked and sexual in this photoshoot, despite how lame of a magazine they obviously are….Lohan just doesn’t know any better…so to her this keeps her credibility and makes sense, to everyone else it’s a few years too late…

Posted in:Desperate|Lindsay Lohan|Photoshoot

2009

02

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Introduces her New Immigrant Pusssy of the Day

I know the only lesbians people care about today is the Mom from Family Ties, even though she’s lost all sex appeal she might have had, you know with being old as fuck. The deal with later-in-life lesbians is that they are tired of dealing with men, especially after 3 failed marriages and all prospects are out fucking younger pussy, and their hormones are all out of whack thanks the menopause, you know the whole transition from woman to androgynist equipped with more testosterone than any of you motherfuckers….

But I still have a soft spot in my panties for Lohan even though she’s dying, her career is dead and she had to go to some third world country to pick up the kid she used to sponsor named Calle Lourdes Demar, because she’s the only girl willing to give Lohan any love or attention even though she is ugly as fuck….and here she is with her big reveal as she introduces her new pussy to her bodyguard, which to Lohan is like introducing her to her family, because her family is too busy being self absorbed and fucked up to care….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Calle Lourdes Demar|Lesbians|Lindsay Lohan