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Archive for the SFW Category

2016

17

Jun

Hometown Hotty Anais Pouliot of the Day

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Anais Pouliot is a French Canadian from a suburb 20 minutes out of Montreal, the city I live in for legal reasons…

She didn’t spend that much time working in montreal, or hanging out in montreal, or being my friend in montreal calling me to grab a salad for lunch, or maybe hit a model fitness class, like Pilates or Hot Yoga…but she still came out of this place…and her french trash family still lives in this place…and just because she’s gone to New York and done one or two shoots for Victoria’s Secret….doesn’t mean she’s not that above ground pool, Poutine eating, stripper who got away…and just because she kind of made it in America…I know, at her core, she’s still french trash and has erratic anal sex on the first encounter as French girls do…

I assume she’s at the tail end of her career but still has those french legs and unlike most French Canadians with hard bodies I know, doesn’t have that hard smokers face by 30 – because she escaped that fate for Luxury…

I also find local whores who make it in the world lost opportunity I’ll never get back – because there was a window in their career where I could have manipulated them into sex…because in case you didn’t know …Paula Abdul follows me on Twitter – along with 13,000 people, like we’re our own small down…touched by the leader, out god…the illustrious medicated choreographer pop tart in her 90s…

Here she is in a magazine for some local content, even though she probably has her green card like an islamic radical…you Americans just hand them out.

Posted in:Anais Pouliot|SFW

2016

17

Jun

Meatloaf Out – Of the Day

Ballad Rock Opera master with the voice of an over dramatic angel – straight from the Rocky Horror Picture show – to the 90s collapsed on stage in what is probably the most appropriate song to die to – at least more theatrical way to die…

The master of 80s of rock and emotional breakdowns on the Apprentice with your leader Donald Trump was performing in Edmonton Canada, at 68 yeras of age, despite being a fat, asthmatic, who should probably just have taken it easy in his later years than running city to city to sing intensely….I’m not 68 and can’t even fuck a 21 year old on my back without heart injury….

I like how the audience prove they are just spectators at the circus as they scream for him as motherfucker is dying…

Let’s hope he pulls through – we need more bats out of hell – not in hell…

Sidenote – what the fuck did this bitch shoot this on, a Closed Circuit security video camera on VHS?

This happened yesterday. What the fuck…

Posted in:Meatloaf|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Victoria’s Beckham Slutty in Elle Hong Kong of the Day

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Victoria’s Beckham is probably pretty big in Hong Kong, but she’s not very big anywhere else..

She’s thin, she’s got a hot body, and in terms of the Spice Girls, she’s manifested into the character she played as a spice girl, of rich, snobby, skinny and pretentious cunt…but more importantly, has aged the best of any of the Spice Girls, I know because I am an obsessed fan who watches their every move….thanks to social media – not because I actually care…

So she was part of this hot shoot – despite being old a mom of a bunch of kids…and it is worth looking at, staring at and remembering that if you find a girl obsessed with you, who marries you and makes you babies, always cheat on her and let her catch you, it’ll keep her more in shape than these other girls who just have all this Spice Girl money and egos, who think they can just let things slip – because they are Spice Girls…

What I am trying to say is…How much I like these skinny legs…which is enough to ignore that she’s old as fuck…

Sidenote – in 1997 – I jerked off to the Spice Girl’s first video…

Posted in:SFW|Victoria's Beckham

2016

16

Jun

Trying to Look Up Jessica Alba’s Skirt of the Day

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Jessica Alba has been on the aggressive hustle to promote herself – because she’s taking her bullshit company of a few years public, which means a big pay day for her, and as long as she gets the attention of the people to divert from the shitty products she’s selling that are apparently misleading and a lie like pretty much everything being sold, including but not limited to Jessica ALba the mom of moms…and I guess the best way to say “look at me”..is wearing a high slit – revealing dress you can imagine having a basic instinct moment – where she proves that mom’s can bounce back from that kind of baby making nonsense – especially when the baby making is primarily to help trap a man / build an empire selling product to clueless new moms who figure Jessica Alba knows a thing or two about housekeeping or running a household and family – because she’s Mexican..and that’s what we do…even though she’s been rich and famous forever and has Mexicans who do that for her….

Here she is braless…

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Blake Lively Pregnancy Stance for Marie Claire of the Day

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Blake Lively is shaowing you how a bitch gets pregnant…on her back yo…legs spread …this is how it’s done – it’s also how she promotes her new movie coming out that is the most hyped thing she’s probably ever done, not because people like Blake Lively – but because people like SHARKS!! Which I guess Blake Lively may be…I mean how else would she have such a illustrious career…and a husband she robbed from Scarlett Johansson…

Posted in:Blake Lively|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Magdalena Frackowiak Slutty Mail Order Bride of the Day

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Magdalena Frackowiak demonstrating the mail order bride wedding porn – you know if you’re a billionaire and can afford to buy a mail order bride of her quality – one with mainstream model success who likes Private Jets, Private Islands, and Private Parties where she will do anything asked of her if her model agency rate is paid….if you know what I mean…

I don’t really have a wedding fetish, weddings are the worst, maybe I wouldn’t mind proving weddings are the worst buy having another man’s bride fetish, which I guess is exactly what Magdelena the Polish Victoria’s Secret model who once had a 750,000 a year contract with Victoria’s Secret so you know she’s unaffordable…in a dress or dresses that remind me of the slow dance at the strip club, you find the final dance where they throw vaginas out there as a marketing push to get their lap dances for the night..something we can assume Magda is very familiar with. It’s how models get jobs.

Posted in:Magdalena Frackowiak|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Farrah Abraham Slutting of the Day

Farrah Abraham is a classy mother – the kind of woman who would get pregnant at 16 strictly to get on MTV show and become a magical celebrity no one really cared about – until the sex tape came out and made me a ton of fucking money because Gawker linked me thanks the exclusive squirt video I posted – because I am a leader in the sex tape scene – but n oone knows or cares or bothers to give me the credit I deserve, not that I really deserve any credit, without all these whores – and their hard work whoring – I would have nothing….

So here she is showing her twat at the pool in Vegas, as good, sound, classy moms who do porn do….because she matters and people care about her asshole…I mean…not really..but we all seemed into watching her horse face fuck and that’s gotta count for something!

Solid facetune

BUY THE SEX TAPE GET ME RICH and PART 2

Posted in:Farrah Abraham|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Vanessa Hudgens Tits Hanging Out of a Car of the Day

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Is this Vanessa Hudgens hanging out of cars with her tits…or her tits hanging out of the car with Vanessa Hudgens…

They’d call this existentialism – if they knew what existentialism was – and by they – I mean – me – since I have no friends.

Posted in:SFW|Vanessa Hudgens

2016

16

Jun

Jennifer Aniston Pregnant at 100 of the Day

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The end of an era maybe – a revel in modern science maybe – an image of survival, making it, never too late to get what you want….inspiring….Jennifer Aniston potentially pregnant…in a bikini…in the Bahamas…because she’s finally decided to pull it off…

I was always under the impression that she missed her window of opportunity, that she was too old for this kind of behavior…but I guess there’s someone out there for everyone, willing to take the chance by busting insider her assuming she won’t get knocked up because she’s old…because they’re married so why the fuck not, that’s what people do….take the risk…even if it’s 20 years too late..

I used to get a kick out of her milking her nipples, but not literally because no one ever knocked her up, but figuratively in everything she did, because her nipples were always hard…I used to wonder why she was cast as a babe or love interest even though she was pushing 50 but I was more into her not being able to keep a man around long enough to give her babies…

The two theories were that she was a horrible high maintenance bitch – who they didn’t want to stick with for 18 years or maybe she didn’t want to have kids because shes the kind of pragmatic narcissist who didn’t want to accept her age and reproduce…until just before it was too late…which is now…you know, don’t let a baby ruin me…while I’m still running the scam kind of thing.

If you’re not a mom, you can have the illusion that you are still hot, you can still make money, you can still be the narcissistic twat you obviously are, where you just have to wait until the last minute to go for having a clone in your image.

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston|SFW

2016

16

Jun

Bella Thorne is a Good Time of the Day

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Bella Thorne is everyone’s favorite instagram star from some Disney Channel shit who simulated an 18th birthday to generate some buzz and garner some excitement about her and her future career as the new slutty redhead with a fit body and great tits…who you don’t know or really care about what she does, or what she’s in, but if you’re like me you appreciate that she’s actually on TV, rather than just working for social media / even though she’s obvuously – working it for social media…

We can all agree that all this garbage is just garbage…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Here she is after a colonoscopy we can assume is related to an anal sex injury / colon injury / from anal sex – but maybe she’s got other shitting related issues – which to all of you – that’s hot…

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Here she is at the gym…so CASUAL….poses…not staged at all…in what is the cheesy, and not in a good fake tan / fake tits / big hair / jumping on a trampoline kind of cheesy…but the “look at my intense look on instagram because instagram is my fashion magazine I am the star of and you are all my peasants who worship me”….garbage…

Here she is in bed with FROZEN yogurt that she edited out the logo of – proving that she knows how to edit her photos – using FACETUNE – like all these bitches trying to give themselves smooth skin and waist to hip ratio….

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Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW