I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

18

Sep

I am – Penelope Cruz's Cousin and Sister at the Beach of the Day

penelope_cruz_cousin_tits.jpg

Here are some pictures of Penelope Cruz’s family on the beach somewhere without Penelope Cruz. I have posted about her sister Monica Cruz before, she’s sin the thong, but I have no idea who the topless chick is. The message board I steal my pictures from say that it’s her cousin and it doesn’t really matter who she is, all that matters is that she is living the life, sitting on the beach all thanks to Penelope’s hard work. I guess this is a lot like when they were living in Spain as kids and they’d sit at home all day and send Penelope off to mow lawns, clean houses, work at the local cafe so that when she got home they could steal her paycheck and buy themselves ice cream.

Reality is that I don’t care how she’s related to Penelope Cruz because I just like topless beaches and would post that shit whether bitch was famous or not. I have this fantasy of grandeur, living the life with an above ground pool and a backyard where my stepdaughter and her friends will tan topless while I just sit back and drink beer. All the 18-20 year old hot girls will come over to take advantage of the only pool in the ghetto and I will be a happy fucking man….

I guess the point of this post is that the cousin’s tits are uneven and there’s nothing sexier than bringing a bitch home, taking off her bra to find that shit was being balanced out with a pair of socks and you’re really dealing with some one tit bigger than the other shit that is a lot like driving with a flat tire.

Here are those pics:


Related Posts:

Penelope or Monica Cruz Foot Fetish Pics
Penelope Cruz’s TIts Leaving the Gym
Penelope Cruz Bikini Pictures
Penelope Cruz in a Short Dress

Posted in:Beach|Bikini|Cousin|Monica Cruz|Penelope Cruz|Tits|Topless|Unsorted

2007

18

Sep

I am – Exclusive Paris Hilton Partying Pictures of the Day

paris_hilton_top.jpg

So these pictures magically landed in my inbox today. I feel like Perez Hilton only fatter. They are of Paris Hilton rocking out Drunk Sunday Night at the club LAX for some DJ AM weekly event called Banana Split. They are trying to be cool by booking all the latest hipster acts, but reality is that DJ AM can’t be cool no matter how hard he plays his shitty played out top 40 of the last 30 years bar mitzvah party mix in exclusive limited edition sneakers. Even while Paris Hilton gets drunk and rocks out in the corner of the club making all the people who worked greased the bouncer to get in feel like they are really part of something exclusive….can’t distract them from his shitty DJ set.

Either way, I thought that Paris isn’t supposed to be out drunk partying, she’s supposed to be changing the world or some shit, at least that was the plan after jail. I love seeing people make outrageous life-changing statements and within a few months throw them out the window. Like me everytime I say I am going to quit drinking when I wake up with a wicked hangover, or my wife saying how she’s going to lose weight this year because it’s the year, or my stepdaughter saying she is going to go dyke or give up sex because she doesn’t want to get knocked up again or get AIDS…

Speaking of Lesbians, Paris reminds me of this time I had to shit really badly so I ran into this strip club in the seedy part of town because I figured why not get a lap dance while I am at it, so I bust into the place run to the bathroom when I am done, walk out to find that all the girls are a little burly. I chose the hottest one I could find but she was still fucking tranny looking, but It turned out it was because it was tranny night and I only realized when in the lap dance booth about 30 seconds in and bitches beard rubbed up against my face. I cut shit down to only one song, because its tits were pretty decent implants and it woulda been awkward running out mid-song. Either way, Paris has this tranny thing about her, she’s got these big hands and feet, she craves constant attention, she got a tranny face and she dances like a tranny. It is possible that she was born with both parts, who knows what kind of prescription drugs her ex-prostitute lookin’ wallet-fucking mom was on while knocked up making for all kinds of birth defects.

I guess what it all comes down to is that she’s having a good time, the people love her and she looks like she’s put on 20 lbs and is hiding it under a colorful potato sack. I want to fuck her blond model friend who isn’t really her friend but making strategic career choices to get herself famous…..here are those exclusive pics.


Related Posts:

Paris Hilton’s Panties in a Club Pictures
Paris and Her Sister Doing the Paris Dance in a Club Pictures
Paris Hilton’s Almost Upskirt in the Club Pictures
Paris Hilton and Phony Hipster Icon Cory Kennedy

Posted in:Dancing|Drunk|Paris Hilton|Partying|Unsorted

2007

18

Sep

Sitemap

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

picture-2.jpg

I ended up getting really drunk on the weekend and thought it would be a good idea to go hang out at the emergency room in the hospital. I don’t really know what I was thinking but at 4 in the morning, where else are you going to find people who are awake and willing to talk to you. I could stay on the street and get arrested for breaking shit, try to find the after parties no one wants me at or go to the hospital and sober up with people in desperate need of seeing a doctor. I only met one dude and his story freaked me out so much that I had to get the fuck out of there as fast as possible, realizing that my hospital hang out was a shitty idea, but now that I look back on the shit it’s all pretty funny. He was at a friend’s party and got drunk. They decided it would be funny to shove pool balls up his ass to see how many he could get in. I don’t know what kind of party this was, but I do know that dude wasn’t sitting. He told me that he got 3 in his ass and couldn’t get them out. After trying everything he ended up in the ER. His biggest worry wasn’t that he had pool balls in his ass or that his friends thought it was funny for him to shove pool balls in his ass, he was concerned about how mad his friends parents are going to be when they realize 3 balls are missing from the set.

I figured that story would hit close to home…now click on my links….thanks…

Let’s Hope OJ Goes to Jail This Time…So That His Girlfriend’s Big Tits Can Go Back Into Ugly Chick Porn….Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Who’d You Rather – Emmy Awards
GO

Lindsay Lohan is Addicted to Sex
GO

Rachel Hunter Launches New Swimwear Line
GO

Trishelle – The Serial Party Slut and Useless Reality Star is On Steve-O’s New Show Dr. Steve-O, in a Bikini…
GO

Trishelle on Dr Steve-O Beating Up Some Dude With Raw Chickens On Her Hands With a Nurses Uniform
GO

Some Chick Named Daniela Cicarelli Half Naked in VIdeo
GO

Some Chick Named Kerry Katona’s Showing Off Her Massive Big Tits
GO

Naked Chick Named Alice – On the Rocks
GO

Some Car Show Sluts
GO

Justin Timberlake Slaps a Photographer Like a Girl Video
GO

Elisha Cuthbert May Have a Sex Tape
GO

Here’s a Lion Hugging a Human Video To Make You Feel Warm and Fuzzy…Fag
GO

Some Pink Topless Pics
GO

Some Cop Getting Shot Video
GO

Jessica Simspon Leaving the Gym
GO

Nicole Narain is the Bitch Colin Farrell has a Sex Tape With…This is her 1/2 Naked
GO

Britney Is Losing Custody of her Kids
GO

Some Asshole in Greece Treats His Wife Like a Dog
GO

Some Drunk Bouncer Falls Off a Moving Car In Some Stupid Prank
GO

Paris Hilton Showing off Some Tit or At Least Trying To…
GO

Some OJ Audio Recording Because TMZ Set Him Up
GO

Beastiality Restaurant in Tokyo Lets You Fuck Your Animal of Choice that is Then Killed, Cooked and Eaten
GO

Nicole Richie Pregnancy Cleavage Pics
GO

Lesbians Do the Scissor Stance to the Scissor Sisters…So Poetic
GO

Some Avril Lavigne See Through Action
GO

Some Girl Next Door Named Dawson Miller Naked
GO

Some Dude Draws Asses, Dicks and Pussies and Turns Them Kid Friendly…
GO

Charlie Sheen’s Secret Daughter – Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Some Drunk Chick Goes Insane in her Underwear and Humps The Pool Table, Shakes her Tits and Her Ass…
GO

Hot Beautiful Agony Video for You To Masturbate To Because Watching Girls Cum is Next Fucking Level
GO

Some Chick Named Haylee Hunter Posing Naked in Picture
GO

Rumer Willis Is Not As Hot As Her Mom Cleavage Pics
GO

Lucy Pinder Topless Shoot
GO

Some Girl Masturbates By The Pool
GO

Elizabeth Hurley’s Sister’s Bra
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Some Dude Lookin For a GIrl With a Daddy Complex
GO

Dita Von Tease Naked Pictures
GO

Heather Graham Lesbian Scene from Some Movie…
GO

LeeLee Sobiesky’s Long Legs Because She’s 7 ft Tall
GO

Some Drunk Taxi Cab Confessions Talks About Sex and Kisses Her Friend
GO

Britney Spears is Banned From Chateau Marmont for Some Crazy Stunt Involving Smearing Food on Her Face
GO

Some Creepy Evangeline Lily Compilation Video
GO

Fox Bleeped out Sally Field’s War Speech because It’s the Emmy’s Not a Political Stage…Bitch.
GO

Jordan’s Tits Turn 29…She Turns 40
GO

Some Korean Kids Djing Better than DJ AM
GO

Some Kid Gets Hosed Down By Some Amusment Park Ride
GO

Some Girl Gets Tazared
GO

Milf’s Titty Bounce VIdeo
GO

Some Small Girl Gets Jumped By Some Classy Chicks For Stealing Their KFC
GO

Kelly Brook Lingerie Pictures
GO

Teri Hatcher Sang at an Emmy Party. I guess Britney Was Too Busy Losing Her Kids to Show Up
GO

LA Rag Mag – Went to the Emmies
GO

Some Japanese Baseball Brawl Gayness
GO

New Gwen Stefani Music Video That You Could Jerk Off to if She Was Hot
GO

Angelina Jolie Has Tried All Drugs..But Hated Pot
GO

Some Bitch Named Emily Scott in a Bikini
GO

Vanessa Hudgens Brings Her Bush to the Tyra Show
GO

Paris Hilton Has Some Young Boy Toy Who Will Walk Away From all This WIth Herpes
GO

Some Craziness and Pussy Lickin’ Goes Down at a Party
GO

2 Topless Teens have a Tickle Fight… VIDEO
GO

This Dude is Banging Paula Abdul
GO

Girl Has the Craziest Ride on a Sybian
GO

Some Dude Undresses His Girlfriend While She Sleeps
GO

Lohan’s Dad Sells His Story of His Reunion…This is What He Said
GO

Some Girl Licking Her Feet While Naked
GO

Photobucket Black Porn…
GO

More Photobucket Black Porn…
GO

Lots of Photobucket Self Shot Vagina Pics
GO

Some More Photobucket Nudity
GO

Insane Tits in this Cam Girl Video (nice dog too)
GO

Girl Wants to Style Her Bush Hair
GO

Young Girl Nked on Flotation Devices
GO

Disgusting Girl Bites the Head Off a Frog…
GO

Guys Get a Girl to Show them Her Box on the Beach
GO

Some Dude Isn’t Too Impressed By Chris Crocker The Transgendered Faker…
GO

Demi Moore is Hotter than her Daughter
GO

Some Girls Massive Cans in Picture
GO

Ass Cracks in Ad Campaigns are a Good Thing…
GO

In Sick Porn Clips…This One is of a Daughter Getting Fucked on Her Mother’s Deathbed
GO

Stop It Or I’ll Squirt Gets and 80
GO

You Need To Get Laid – This is a Good Place to Start
GO

Use This Spray TO Get Pussy. It Worked For my Stepdaughter
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Cheryl Tweedy In a See Through Shirt of the Day

cheryl_tweedy_see_through_top.jpg

I like to give back to the people every once in a while and this is one of those times. Cheryl Tweedy needs all the exposure she can get because she’s pretty much a nobody who was once in a Spice GIrls revival band called Girls Aloud. It was such a revolution and amazing play on words that it reminds me of the time I accidentally walking into a french Metallica revival band called Mentallica. I didn’t read the sign properly because I don’t really know how to read very well and I figured getting to see Metallica on a small stage for 2 dollars was a good deal, even though I hate the band. When I got in I realized I was wrong but rocked out to broken the songs in broken english with a bunch of french dudes.

Either way, I am giving back to her by giving her exposure and acknowledging that she’s into exposing her body by wearing a see-through shirt and showing off some really big looking bra that I am not too sure she actually fills, but it looks like she’s stacked enough for a homosexual footballer who used to shower with Beckham to enjoy….

Here are those pics


Related Posts:

Cheryl Tweedy Bikini Pictures
More Cheryl Tweedy Bikini Pictures
Sarah Hardings Tit Slip in Concert
David Beckham Feels Posh Spice Up Pictures

Posted in:Bra|Cheryl Tweedy|Girls Aloud|See Through|Tits|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Some Emmy Award Coverage of the Day

emmy_header.jpg

I wasn’t going to cover any Emmy Awards shit because the Emmy Awards are fucking lame and it was my attempt in protesting them. Reality is that I tried to watch them yesterday because I figured it would inspire me to hate the world more than I do or maybe even take the 4 hours of my life away from me. I promised a reader that I would live-blog but that didn’t happen. Life lesson, never trust a drunken Mexican.

I first tuned in on my neighbors TV during the pre-show red carpet shit and saw the fag from Queer Eye doing fashion play-by-play like it was a fucking sports show. I thought the concept was stupid and was forced to change channels, but that was after I saw lesbian Ellen and her wife who is not so lesbian but realizes that eating Ellen’s pussy is good for business, being interviewed. Ellen was a manic weirdo who must have been jacked on something and it made me question why we let Lesbians on TV.

I tuned in again for the opening performance that was some Family Guy shit, Stewie and the dog were singing about how shitty TV is, I think I laughed a few times but I was drunk and don’t really remember. I do know that I like Family Guy and think it’s the best written show, so I hope they won something.

Ryan Seacrest came on and didn’t make me or anyone in the audience even crack a smile. His jokes weren’t jokes and it was nice to see his Seacrest ship sink, I can only hope this continues in the next events he is involved in, because his demise is well deserved. He’s a 5 minutes of fame gone wrong situation, you know the kind of dude you hate that gets on some Dating Show but somehow turns it into years of success when his talent only should have got him to the elimination round….

The second Ray Romano came on was the second I turned the shit off. I hate his voice and seeing him on TV reminded me why I don’t watch TV. I used to go crazy everytime his show came on, I am talking throwing shit at the TV to make the pain stop.

I also kept catching my neighbor staring at me while rubbing his leg, and despite being all for dirty old men, I can’t accept dirty old men giving me the eye mainly because I am not into gay but also because I am disgusting looking and anyone giving me the eye whether man or woman is clearly fucked in the head and someone I don’t want to be around…I felt like I accidentally walked into some kind of secret gay man hook up zone like a public bathroom that fags use as a meeting place to fuck while their wives are out shopping or some shit…and despite it being more exciting than the Emmies, I still had to get the fuck out.

Here are some pictures of the event:

Christina Aguilera and Her Pregnancy Tits

Eva Longoria and Her Mexican Ass

Hayden Panettiere and Her Floppy Tits Hiding Under a Tent of a Dress I can only assume she wanted to wear adult sizes for once and this is the result

Heidi Klum is Living Beauty and the Beast

Jaime Lynn Sigler Brings Her Eating Disorder as Her Date

Jaime Pressly 4 Months After Letting The World Knows She Has Unprotected Sex By Having a Baby

Jennifer Love Hewitt Hiding Her Fat Ass We All Know She Has…

Kaley Cuoco Because She’ll Never Be On TV Again

Katherine Heigl is the Big Winner…Literally…

Kristen Bell Because I Don’t Know Who She Is…

Lisa Rinna Because She Hasn’t Been on TV for a Decade…But Her Fake Tits Get Her Past Security…

Maria Menounos Because She’s Greek and Takes it in the Ass

Michelle Pfeiffer is Old But Still Hotter Than Anyone You Know…

Phoebe Price Because Her Dress Has Windows

Portia DiRossi Because She’s a Fake Lesbian and We Like Fake Lesbians Because It Means They Will Let Us Fuck Them While They Eat Out Their Friends…

Teri Hatcher Because She Banged Ryan Seacrest

I am sure there are more, but this took me long enough to do and I am over the Emmy Awards….

Bonus – Christina Aguilera Performance with Tony Bennett


Related Posts:

Live Bloggin the Academy Awards in 2007
Live Bloggin the VMAs in 2006
The MMVA Picture Thread 2006
Christina Aguiler Half Naked Performance at Some Award Show
Jesse Jane’s Tits at the Adult Night Club and Exotic Awards

Posted in:Christina Aguilera|Dresses|Emmy Awards|Eva Longoria|Hayden Panettiere|Heidi Klum|Jaime Lynn Sigler|Jaime Pressly|Jennifer Love Hewitt|Katherine Heigl|Kayley Cuoco|Kristen Bell|Lisa Rinna|Maria Menounos|Michelle Pfeiffer|Phoebe Price|Portia DiRossi|Teri Hatcher|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Jennifer Ellison Bikini Pictures of the Day

jennifer_ellison_bikini8.jpg

I have no idea when these pictures were taken mainly because I don’t even know who this bitch is, but also because I am not good at staying on top of shit. I can’t even recognize the real celebrities in pictures so pointing out some no name is pretty much impossible. I do know that these pictures are doing the rounds and that she’s got some big tits and an exposed ass and that’s something I fully support.

The thing I like about no name d-list celebrities is that they have these huge fucking egos. They think they are more important than they are and give attitude to anyone who crosses their path, because they are trying to maintain that they are important because they have been on TV or in a magazine or some shit. Real celebs aren’t as accessible because people are constantly running after them and actually care about them, so I’d never know if they work the same way but I’ll never know and I don’t really care.

What I do know is that I met some useless actor from commercials out of LA who has been there for 2 years trying to establish himself with some kind of career. He was talking to a girl I was talking to. Dude was talking about how he likes to visit montreal, but his new home is LA and that he’ll be going back fro auditions in a couple of days, thinking that that will lock down her vagina for him. He would go off on how he’s met certain celebs and how the bars in LA are way cooler than the shit hole we happened to be in. He was drinking champagne and I thought his game was fucking weak but dude still got the girl to go home with him.

All this to say that losers with a dream who are delusional enough to move to LA in hopes of being found, get a lot of pussy when they leave LA because the girls they meet are easily impressed and fuck them in the event they ever do hit it big so that they have a story to tell their kids.

What I am getting at is that if you can’t impress girls you meet lie. Tell them you are some d-list piece of shit, drink champagne and compare everything to LA and you will probably end up getting laid or beat up by local guys who think actors are fags and don’t like the way their scarves seduce the local sluts….

Here are those Jennifer Ellison Bikini pictures.


Related Posts:

Jennifer Ellison’s See Through Shirt Pictures
Jennifer Ellison is a 2 Dollar Hooker Pictures
Jennifer Ellison Public Service Announcement

Posted in:Ass|Beach|Bikini|Jennifer Ellison|Tits|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Jessica Simpson’s Got Some Ripped Muscular Legs of the Day

jessica-simpson-shorts-legs14.jpg

Here are some pictures of a new Jessica Simpson with her ripped legs. The funny thing about being famous is that when bitch was 15 pounds fatter we all ripped into her for being a fat bitch who needed to lay off the ice cream sandwiches in John Mayer’s dressing room. Now bitch has committed to herself to working out, lost all the fat and has legs that remind me of a wrestler and the easy thing to do would be to dis her, but I won’t because I’d take a strong chick over a fat chick any fucking day, and if I could get my wife to fit into a pair of small shorts instead of the XXL sweats she currently rocks, my penis would be in a happier fucking place.

I used to go to a strip club that always had muscle chicks on staff. They looked nothing like a Jessica Simspon, because these bitches were the real deal. I am talking 30 inch thighs, huge biceps and the broadest fucking backs. I never understood why they were there, I think the manager was into that kind of thing or something, or maybe they couldn’t hold down a real job because they were too busy doing push-ups or some shit. Everytime they’d try to sell me a lap dance, I’d ask them how much it would cost to arm wrestle them instead. Unfortunately, these bitches didn’t think like dudes because otherwise they’d laugh and have a go, but they just looked liked dudes and thought the same way the other hotter strippers thought, like that they were some kind of goddess or fantasy who deserved my money for showing me her pectorals and clit the size of a grown man’s thumb…I never went through with it because I was scared, but I am sure they were really nice people.

Either way, here’s the Jessica Simpson in shorts rockin’ some solid legs I would still like to wear as a scarf.


Related Posts:

Jessica Simpson’s Hard Nipples Pictures
Some Jessica Simpson Cleavage Pictures
Some Jessica Simpson Tits in a Bule Dress Pictures
Jessica Simpson has Strong Legs

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Legs|Muscular|Short Shorts|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Jessica Simpson's Got Some Ripped Muscular Legs of the Day

jessica-simpson-shorts-legs14.jpg

Here are some pictures of a new Jessica Simpson with her ripped legs. The funny thing about being famous is that when bitch was 15 pounds fatter we all ripped into her for being a fat bitch who needed to lay off the ice cream sandwiches in John Mayer’s dressing room. Now bitch has committed to herself to working out, lost all the fat and has legs that remind me of a wrestler and the easy thing to do would be to dis her, but I won’t because I’d take a strong chick over a fat chick any fucking day, and if I could get my wife to fit into a pair of small shorts instead of the XXL sweats she currently rocks, my penis would be in a happier fucking place.

I used to go to a strip club that always had muscle chicks on staff. They looked nothing like a Jessica Simspon, because these bitches were the real deal. I am talking 30 inch thighs, huge biceps and the broadest fucking backs. I never understood why they were there, I think the manager was into that kind of thing or something, or maybe they couldn’t hold down a real job because they were too busy doing push-ups or some shit. Everytime they’d try to sell me a lap dance, I’d ask them how much it would cost to arm wrestle them instead. Unfortunately, these bitches didn’t think like dudes because otherwise they’d laugh and have a go, but they just looked liked dudes and thought the same way the other hotter strippers thought, like that they were some kind of goddess or fantasy who deserved my money for showing me her pectorals and clit the size of a grown man’s thumb…I never went through with it because I was scared, but I am sure they were really nice people.

Either way, here’s the Jessica Simpson in shorts rockin’ some solid legs I would still like to wear as a scarf.


Related Posts:

Jessica Simpson’s Hard Nipples Pictures
Some Jessica Simpson Cleavage Pictures
Some Jessica Simpson Tits in a Bule Dress Pictures
Jessica Simpson has Strong Legs

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Legs|Muscular|Short Shorts|Unsorted

2007

17

Sep

I am – Christina Aguilera’s See Through Pregnancy Nipples Dress of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

So we all know that Christina Aguilera is pregnant and we all know that her husband isn’t the best looking dude in the world, because he kinda reminds us of the kid who had no friends growing up. The funny thing about the kid with no friends growing up was just a little socially awkward and funny looking, but all that alone time and rejection lead him to learn some kind of skill, That skill was making enough money doing whatever the fuck he does to get in circles where girls like Christina Aguilera hangs out for long enough to pull his dick out and blow her away with what’s gotta be some kind of heavy machinery, because this slut looks like a size queen….so here he is knocking some popstar up when every girl who ever turned him down or laughed at him is sitting in her shitty home in the shitty town they are from looking at her shitty husband who was the highschool hero but now can barely make enough money to pay for their shitty car, listening to Augilera songs while cooking their shitty dinner with food they bought with coupons, knowing the whole time that life coulda been a lot better for her, had she not been such a superficial fucking cunt. I guess karma is a bitch.

Unfortunately, you’re the socially awkward kid everyone avoided because you smell and you have no skills that will ever take you to places popstars hang out and if you were there you wouldn’t be able to impress her with your huge penis you’d just probably make her laugh or run away, something you’re used to by now…but thanks to these pictures you don’t need to get into any celebrity high profile circle to make out this bitches tits she’s doing all the work for us….in a few months these fuckers are going to have a baby dominating them, so enjoy it while they last….


Related Posts:

Christina Aguilera’s Pregnancy Tits Pictures
Christina Aguilera’s Crazy Pregnancy Cleavage Pictures
Christina Aguilera’s Crazy Tits in China Pictures
Christina Aguilera’s Tour Bus Video

Posted in:Breasts|Christina Aguilera|cleavage|Nipple|Pregnant|See Through|Tits|Unsorted