I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

14

Jul

Jessica Simpson Sex Tape with Her Lover of the Day

These are some pictures of Jessica Simpson’s intimate relationship with food. You know when all she needed to feel sensual was an all you can eat buffet. Her animalistic cravings for BBQ meats, fried foods and the dessert cart lead to steamy, sometimes raunchy, often obscene and always hot nights together, until a few months went by and she realized not only could she not fit in her pants but that the world had turned on her after finding out about this lucid affair, forcing her to quit the shit cold turkey and hit the gym, turning a new leaf…one without the lover that still hangs over her head, but is now just a memory of a salacious affair she holds dear to her vagina.

We’ve got some screencaps of a filthy and raw and carnal night she spent with a chocolate bar. I’m excited to see what went down after the blowjob…I’m thinking anal….

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Sex Tape

2009

14

Jul

Christina Ricci Calls Single and Lookin’ for Storage in Jeans of the Day

Christina Ricci called off her engagement and is being forced to look for storage to keep her stuff in while she takes on this new chapter of her life being a single girl in a big world, who is not nearly as hot as she used to be, but at least has money and celebrity status that is enough for desperate dudes who used to jerk off to her fat tits before she murdered them, willing to explore the depths of her pussy.

The funny thing about these pictures is that the sign next to her head is also the same message that was written in the first valentine’s day card she ever got, only it read:

Thank your Vagina for BEING public storage for all of our dicks. We appreciate your effort.

And it was sent by the group of dudes she was fucking. True story. Something I predict will happen again now that she’s single and is going to go all crazy as all girls do.

Another true story. I used to have a crush on her when she was in the Addams Family, but that’s just because she was at her fresh-faced hottest…

Fine that wasn’t a true story, she was only 11 and it was meant to be a joke that none of you got because you aren’t even reading this….thanks for the support, here are the pics….

Posted in:Christina Ricci|Single

2009

14

Jul

Gay Amputee Singing Mariah Carey’s Obsessed of the Day

I am all for disabilities, if anything being a gay amputee would be an asset in the gay world. Mainly because gays will bang anything they can get their dicks inside and really all homie needs is an asshole and he’s good to fuckin’ go. But also because gays are always into freakish fetish shit, from wearing assless pants in public to other shit sexual deviants hustle, because if they wanted Disney sex they’d be straight, married and have kids. They wouldn’t be jacked on coke, poppers, MDMA, Viagra and GHB at 7 am Saturday morning in a bath house fuckin’ and getting fucked by 12 dudes they don’t know…

I am not for fans singing along to their favorite song badly. Shit’s a pet peeve of mine. So homie should keep this act for Gay Karaoke and keep it off the internet, mainly because people are just going to pass this shit around laughing at the poor motherfucker who’s already been wronged by God and doesn’t need to draw more attention to himself, but also because he’s no good. Enjoy.

Posted in:Gay Amputee|Mariah Carey

2009

14

Jul

stepLINKS of the Day

Today’s been pretty shitty. My ear exploded at a concert 2 weeks ago and still hurts and makes me dizzy. So walking down the street is funny cuz I look drunk but shitty cuz when I get drunk it gets worse and I end up falling and hurting myself more. It also burns when I pee. Not too sure what’s up with that and I may or may not have had a mild heart attack twice today. But I guess that’s life, at least my life and I won’t bother killing myself, even though I probably should. I will however post these links and drink me some more drink, cuz that’s the only thing that I look forward to in a day and that sounds way more depressing than it is.

Here you go..

Jessica Simpson and Her Big Tits Are Single Again
GO

Megan Fox See Thru
GO

Lily Allen is See Through and Has a Camel Toe
GO

More From Auto Tune the News
GO

Slutty Model Pics Of The Day: Ariel Meredith
GO

Your Business Cards Suck
GO

And More From Lohans Twitter
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Cartman Wants You To Suck His Balls
GO

Bikini Amazon Godess? Hmmmmm…
GO

striptease of the Day
GO

Those Homo Pengeuins at the SF Zoon Broke Up
GO

Eva LongWHOREiaz Likes to be Tied Up
GO

And More Michael Jackson Rumoes
GO

Opens Wide, Leighton Meester
GO

Kacey is Sexy All Over
GO

Jon Gosselin’s New Whore Likes to Soke the Good Shit
GO

Some Sluts Hang Out On Entourage
GO

Wino is Back in England, I Wonder Hot Long Before She’s Back On Junk
GO

Danielle Lloyd Dons Lingerie Again
GO

Bachelorette Party Fun with a Female Stripper
GO

Who Cares About Her Bar Trick, Check Out Her Tits
GO

Mother Daughter Pussy Flash
GO

Frankie HAs Multiple Orgasms
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Summer Skirts From Russia
GO

Get Ready For The Biggest Piece of Shit Clothing Line Ever
GO

Samurai Cop Awesomeness
GO

Who’s Amanda Hardington? I Don’t Know, But She’s in a Bikini
GO

Red Head Arial Takes It Outdoor
GO

Amy Reid is Kinky
GO

Emma Watson Gets Hotter By the Day
GO

When Asians Do Christopher Walken Movies
GO

Peach in a Field of Dreams
GO

Scarlett Johansson Mango Photo Shoot
GO

Baby Korean B-Boy
GO

Sex Ed Videos
GO

Rumoe Willis is a Punky Lesbian…or Something
GO

Nicole Pietrontone Crowned Miss COED
GO

Oxana on the Beach
GO

Someone At Dairy Queen Should Have Thought This Through
GO

Sexiest Female Celebs Smokin’ Cigars
GO

Wrestling babe Christy Hemme is fuckin’ hot!
GO
 

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

13

Jul

Jessica Alba Shows a Little Bra of the Day

Jessica Alba was out showing a little bra to remind us all that despite having a kid that murdered her sex appeal, vagina and naked body and left shit in a bloody pile in the corner, she’s still alive and kickin’ and by kickin’ I mean boring as fucking shit…not that shit can’t be exciting depending on the day, but Jessica Alba can’t, she’s too uptight and even pictures of the cunt being wild aren’t even PG, I heard it’s gotta do with the no-nudity clause in her boring contract, unless it’s to trick dudes to not leave you by getting pregnant.

Posted in:Bra|Jessica Alba

2009

13

Jul

Tila Tequila’s Ustream Insanity Nipple Slip Strip of the Day

I can’t follow Tila Tequila on twitter anymore. It’s just too fucking desperate to see her trying to get male attention or fame or whatever the fuck it is she’s looking for and her tweets just annoy me. I am all for girls trying to suck dick to get to the top, I am all for girls with serious daddy issues, who are willing to get naked and compromise any self respect they may have possibly had, but I hate having to watch it unfold all day long on the internet makes me feel like I am part of her insane, cheesy, stripper, clubkid, loser life and that’s just not working for me.

What is working for me is that she doesn’t deny being a whore and gives her fans what they want. No matter how desperate it seems, at least it’s authentic slutty behavior.

Here’s a video of her nipple slip and erotic dance cuz she’s an exhibitionist, this is what her life is all about and people are willing to watch as long as she’s willing to keep up the slutty since she’s got a lot of time on her hands, I just don’t know why she hasn’t got fucked on camera yet, maybe it is because all of this is a fuckin lie.

Posted in:Tila Tequila|Ustream

2009

13

Jul

30th Annual Mooning of the Trains Event of the Day

Not only is there is an annual train mooning event, but it’s been going on for 30 fuckin’ years. Sure the turnout is almost as pathetic as one of my birthday parties, because I have no friends, and the people who do show up are just homeless lookin’ motherfuckers who have nothing better to do with their days, and I’m sure no one is really making huge bank off this shit, like it’s no fuckin’ Woodstock 1997, but the fact that it happens is pretty fucking amazing and is inspiring me to start up a useless festival of my own called “Annual Riding Drunkenstepfather’s Face Like It was the Bus” festival, but I figure the quality of pussy willing to allow that kind of thing to happen to them will make me envious of the Train Mooning event’s turnout, which isn’t saying much other than that I am a loser.

Posted in:30th annual|mooning trains

2009

13

Jul

Lisa “Pussyface” Rinna’s Jacked Body of the Day

I used to know a bitch who was into suction on her pussy. She made this device with a plastic cup and a garden hose that she’d but over her vagina and start sucking and one day I was lucky enough to watch. She said something it being the only way she can get off, but I’ll tell you the space creature shit that happened to her vagina under that kind of pressure was disgusting as a vagina should never be seen under those conditions, and it was the one time I couldn’t get off to a naked bitch who wasn’t my wife and the shit looked a lot like Lisa Rinna’s mouth.

Here is Lisa Rinna on the beach and she is fuckin’ jacked and I guess not eating is the least she can do after spending all that money over the years on lips, tits, and labia reduction surgery that has yet to be confirmed but would explain what the hell is on her face.

Posted in:Body|Lisa Rinna|Ripped|Tits

2009

13

Jul

Shanna Moakler in her Fat Chick Dress of the Day

It’s a pretty bad sign when you have breast implants and shit looks like its sagging, it means you’ve been emotionally eating a little too much since the second love of your life’s dick got burnt off in a plane crash and you haven’t been able to fuck in months, I mean I guess that’s what’s going on here, or maybe she’s just fat because that’s what happens when Playboy and Reality TV doesn’t want you anymore, and who really cares, I know I don’t.

Posted in:Fat|Shanna Moakler

2009

13

Jul

Christian Audigier Helps Girls With Their Bikini Tops of the Day

I guess I was wrong about Christian Audigier. I thought he was just some full of shit cocksucker who managed to use his Von Dutch hat money to exploit some famous tattoo artist for a bunch of his famous designs to put on the most obnoxious and expensive t-shirts in history, but watching him fix this groupie wallet fuckin’ dumpy whore’s bikini on the cheesiest yacht in the history of yachting that is stocked with orange old men trying to relive their 20s with a giant sequined, gold foiled logo across the bow, Audigier is proving that he really understands garments and the complexity of bikini tops because not only is it part of his extensive product line, it is also a line item in the rider he issues to the escort agency when hiring sluts to hang with him and his old buddies on his yacht, because he’s pretty much won the fuckin’ lottery and I blame you.

Posted in:Christian Audigier|Yacht