I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

24

Jun

Denise Richards in a Bikini Top with Birds of the Day

I know you probably still care about Denise Richards because you have a hard time letting go. You remember 10 years ago as being the glory day, because you were still in college and had your whole life ahead of you, your friends were always down to party, and this bitch was your celebrity fantasy, but that all went sour when you realized that you had to take a shitty job to pay your student loan, one you can’t stomach going to and everyday you feel like part of you dies a little, but for some reason you can’t leave because you can’t find anything better, you married the chick from the bar you used to fuck because you realized that you had no other real option and that she was probably the best you could do for yourself, even though everyday you tell her you love her, you’re lying and know that you can’t stand her and the fact that she’s tricked you into this fuckin’ life you live, but at least you always have Denise Richards fantasies to get you off, until pricks like me come along and show you that life hasn’t been all too friendly to her either giving you some comfort in other people’s misery, but really just taking away the last good thing you have from your youth.

Here she is in a bikini top and shorts cuz she hates her ass and rockin’ some kind of parrot like she’s a pirate because I guess in her scam of a career, she kinda is one.

Posted in:Bikini|Denise Richards

2009

24

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

I just got back from an open bar party and I took full advantage of it. The interesting thing was that the event was 99 percent chicks and I felt like I was creeping in the closet at a slumber party and every chick we spoke to asked us why the hell we were there, after they gave us handjobs, and by handjobs I mean dirty looks.

Here are my links, fuck yourself.

ecause The Porno Theatre Has Loads of Weird Dudes, and No Sitting At Home Being a Weird Dude Alone is Alot Better
GO

Are Your Breasts Getting You Down
GO

And Now, The New iPhone
GO

5 Megan Fox Scenes No One Has Seen
GO

And Now, Some Arabic High Diving
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Jennifer Aniston is Courgar-iffic
GO

Sienna Miller Just Doesn’t Give a Shit
GO

Now THESE Are Album Covers!
GO

Confessions of a Tattoo Vixen
GO

Surprise! The Little Bitch Who Got the Stars Tattooed All Over Her Lied
GO

Strip Video of the Day
GO

EVEN THE GAYS HATE PARIS HILTON!
GO

I Never Thought Jennifer Aniston Would Make Me Want to Puke, and She Has Done It
GO

Cameron Diaz Flashed Her Ass On the Tonight Show
GO

Isabel Lucas Could Be Pretty Hot is She Did Herself Up
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If Shia LeBoufe is Fucking Megan Fox, Anything is Possible
GO

Orit Fox Has The Biggest Tits in Isreal
GO

Lily Allen WTF
GO

Jessica Alba Gallery
GO

Nikita Will Make You Crave Fruit
GO

Ever Heard the Term Whsiper Pants?
GO

Elizabitch Hasslecrack is Getting Sued
GO

Cute Blonde Shows It All Off
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Jess and Dara Get It On
GO

Lesbians Love Anal
GO

Ghost Drive the Arab Way
GO

Joanna Krupa Has a Potty
GO

Megan Fox Gallery
GO

Anastasia is Cosy On a Rug
GO

Shower Time!
GO

Bikini Marketing 101
GO

Liza Doesn’t Like Underwear
GO

Sarah Jean Underwood is a Playboy Babe
GO

John Mayer Hates Perez Hilton, So Maybe JOhn Mayer Isn’t So Bad Afterall
GO

Russel Simmons is Always Banging Hot Chicks
GO

Hey!!! Wanna See My Penis?
YOU DON’T HAVE A CHOICE!!!
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

23

Jun

This Perez Getting Punched Shit is So Retarded of the Day

I am glad Perez got punched because it led to me being on a big radio show. I am not glad that he got punched because he didn’t get killed and that means we have to listen to him cry about him and people talk about him and the whole thing is so insignificant.

I saw him acting erratic that night while Will.I.Am stayed cool the entire time and I truly feel that if someone says something offensive while getting their ugly face up into the wrong person, it’s easy to get knocked the fuck out…

I am not saying that punching someone in the face is the way I deal with shit, but I have been punched many times because I have got in the wrong person’s face, and I’ve offended that wrong person, and people sometimes have a tendency to get physical when angry, whether it is illegal or not.

I was bitch slapped fuckin’ hard 2 weeks ago for pretty much runnin’ my mouth off to some racist dude. It happens to me almost everytime I get drunk, because I am abrasive and people don’t like my jokes. I don’t press charges. I take it like a man and go home and cry about how much a failure I am cuz no one gets me.

Perez is being an unstable baby about things. He is crying and wasting Canadian tax payer’s money by pressing charges while real emergencies are going on and people are getting killed, wives beaten, kids molested, kiddie porn traded, gang wars, rape and prostitution rings created and that’s just at my apartment block, when it was really not a big deal and the only real big deal about all this is that he never got hit before, considering he is such a hateful fuckin’ rodent of a bitter person.

There is no reason that Will.I.Am or any celebrity should be talking to the annoying clown no matter how powerful his site is, he is not a real celebrity, he’s just a leech and no matter how many readers he has or how much money he makes, he’s just a fuckin’ clown, and this whole thing is gayer than Perez, I don’t like that I wrote about it again, but this picture is hysterical and I had no choice…

Here’s a video of a preacher getting punched…

Posted in:Perez Hilton|Punched

2009

23

Jun

More Katie Price Breast Lift of the Day

Not sure what’s going on here but I assume Katie Price is doing her breast exercises, you know the ones the plastic surgeon prescribes you after you get your tits jacked the fuck up, so that your shit doesn’t get hard and awkward lookin, forcing you to massage them daily, to soften the silicone, the prescription that strippers love, because they are lettin’ dudes grab their tits for 10 dollars a song anyway, so now there’s an actual rationale behind their mild cockteasing prostitution, but when you’re in the process of filing for divorce after married to a gay dude, you are forced to do that shit yourself, and when you’re an exhibitionist slut, you do it out in public by the pool.

Point of the story is that her body is fuckin’ weird….but I’m still lookin’ at it….

Bonus – here she is on a party boat with Euros….

Posted in:Bikini|Katie Price

2009

23

Jun

Denise Richards Bikini Pictures of the Day

I read something about Denise Richards having downsized her tits because her D-Cups were too ridiculous for her size 0 frame, but the sad thing that she didn’t realize was that her D-Cups were the only reason she was getting work, so killin off her tits, was directly responsible for killin’ off her career, but the good news for her is that she can ride off of Charlie Sheen’s money, that’s what getting knocked up by a rich dude is all about at least that is what this gay dude who wanted to get me pregnant told me, but I knew he was up to something cuz I don’t have a uterus.

Posted in:Bikini|Denise Richards

2009

23

Jun

Lookin Up Jennifer Aniston’s Skirt of the Day

I just spend 5 minutes zooming in and out of this Jennifer Aniston upskirt pictures like some kind of virgin, not because I am a virgin but because I have a lot of fuckin’ time on my hands. In a lot of ways I am like a retired man, you know taking naps off and on all day, watching Soap Operas at McDonalds, but in reality I am just unemployed, unlike Aniston, who is seen here working, which is really all she has going for her, since no man she goes for will date her, impregnate her, or marry her.

The reason isn’t so much that dude’s won’t settle with her, it’s that she has too high standards and needs to take it down a notch. We get it, you scored Brad Pitt and got him to marry you in your glory days, well he left you and maybe it’s time to stop lookin for someone better than him because at this point it is not going to happen. He is Brad Fuckin’ Pitt….and you’re a bunch of years older and a lot more irrelevant….

Sitting at home, or in your trialer on set, obsessing over him, hoping things turn around and he realizes he made a mistake and was actually in love with her, is just wishful thinking. Just because the good times and memories they had together were the happiest times of your life, doesn’t mean they were his, and this whole Angelina shit is not just a phase, he got her knocked up and maybe you were the phase, despite thinkin he’s your family, your soulmate, your everything…..you’re going to die the fuck alone….because it’s over and time to move on….

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston|Skirt

2009

23

Jun

Tea Leoni in a Bikini of the Day

I used to want to fuck Tea Leoni, now…not so much. I dont know what it was that I liked about her at the time, it was awhile ago, but I know that it’s got less to do with her arms being jacked like she’s got a fuckin’ dick and more to do with knowing that she can’t keep her man sexually satsified, forcing him to develop a sex and porn addiction and publicly embarrassing him by sharing that with the world as some kind of punishment for how badly he’s hurt her when she found out, while the real punishment started by being married to a cunt who was too busy doing pushups to fuck proper. Here she is in a bikini.

Posted in:Bikini|Tea Leoni

2009

23

Jun

Miley Cryrus in Some Inappropriate Pictures of the Day

As my extensive research has proven time and time again…all men are perverts.

So even when you get a respectable, seemingly harmless dude alone in a room with a girl, he’s going to be thinking about fuckin’ her, even if that girl is underage, even if she’s fat, even if she’s a fuckin’ lesbian, even if she’s his daughter, because we have penises and that’s what penises make us do.

Even gay dudes, who don’t like vagina, grab and rub up on their female friends when they are alone with them so I am not all that surprised that Miley’s director, a dude named Adam Shankman took these “Innocent” pictures of Miley and since all girls are whores who like attention and feeling desirable, I’m sure he didn’t even have to say “Give me your sexy look”, because she was the one who was probably trying to mount his dick like she is mouting this chair…

She’s horny, young and an out of control church girl, and really bouncing on her boss’ dick is all she knows, thanks to the execs at Disney.

I’m sure this shit is totally harmless, but figure you can probably still rub one out to it, cuz you like useless rich sluts with fucked up faces who like male attention even if you don’t have a fuckin’ chance….

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|Slut

2009

23

Jun

RIP Motherfucker Ed McMahon Edition of the Day

I want a full fuckin’ investigation on this shit, Ed McMahon’s been murdered and I’m not talking by God. He’s only 86 and 86 is the new “old as shit”, but I think it was done by a motherfucker who still resents him from that Publisher’s Clearance house “You just won 10 million dollars” mail-in scam…that tricked idiots into buying books in exchange for a dream McMahon would show up on their doorstep, or maybe he was killed by Britney Spears, because she blames him for her whole crazy shit cuz he touched her in the dressing room or something,

Or Justin Timberlake who still resents him for losing…..

RIP Motherfucker.

Posted in:Ed McMahon|RIP Motherfucker

2009

23

Jun

Kristen Stewart in Her Leather Pants on All Fours of the Day

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|Leather Pants