I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

11

Jun

This is My New Form of Entertainment of the Day

I don’t really watch real porn. I find the shit too fucking lame, but when I came across this trailer for a porn, I couldn’t help but post it. I guess the assholes at Digital Playground don’t realize that doing these big production, shitty acting, shitty script, dramatic movies, like they were some straigth to DVD shit starring Mischa Barton and Jessica Biel, when really they are just supposed to be about the fuckin’.

I guess it’s their way of keeping shit different than what’s out there, you know big budget, big box office result kind of thinking, but this trailer blew me away, and not in a good way, because it’s almost laughable at what kind of money has gone into it, considering that it is just a fuckin’ porno.

This is how I am starting today and I don’t care if you approve.

Posted in:Digital Playground|Porn Previews

2009

10

Jun

stepLINKS of the Day

In case you were wondering, when you are vagina hunting in the park, spending a few hours smoking cigarettes with a group of 14 year old girls in their school uniforms is a huge waste of time.

In case you were wondering, when a gay dude asks you to recommend a horror movie for a sleepover they are having, recommend straight porn, since pussy is the worst kind of monster to a fag.

In case you were wondering, I haven’t eaten in 2 days because I am trying to get my bikini body like I was that fat black chick on The View who is planning her big titty reveal.

In case you were wondering, I am working my way to the top, but I always get stuck at the first or second step, I have pretty shitty stamina, I am lazy, and I have convinced myself that I have asthma.

Here are my stepLINKS……

If You Think You Have Seen All Web Sluts Have to Offer, You Are Wrong
GO

There’s Something You Just Don’t Do and Tasering a 72 Year Old Lady is One of them
GO

As If Animal Sex Didn’t Rule Enough Already
GO

The 9 Hottest Korean Women
GO

Leona Lewis Has Got Some Big Ass Tits
GO

DIY Wall of DEATH? Why Not?
GO

Julia Roberts is Still Looking Like She Would Enjoy My Penis Inside Her
GO

I Really Wanna Play Some Mario Kart
GO

Make Some Use of That Webcam Grammy Bought You For Your Birthday
GO

Well Hello There Melina
GO

I’m Already Praying For Kendra Wilkinson’s Unborn Child
GO

Psycho Killer Asylym – The Movie
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Leo Dicaprio’s Penis Must Be Crying Today
GO

Lesbian Sex For Bill Clinton’s Friends? Paris Hilton May Have Some Explaining to Do
GO

Liz Hurley Panty Peek
GO

Jesus Christ Beyonce is Looking good Lately
GO

Cameron Diaz is Going to Die a Lonely Cougar
GO

I See Hollywood is Well On It’s Way to Ruining the Joan Jett Movie
GO

Hey Mel B, If Your Husband Says He Loves Your Body, He’s Lying to You
GO

Girls Who Like to Fight
GO

Heidi Honey is Topless
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Calm the Fuck Down, It’s Just a Rollercoaster
GO

Who Would Run Away From This Hot Bitch
GO

A MILF and Two Lesbian Baseball Honeys
GO

Shawna Less Has Something to Show You
GO

Sandra Lou Needs a Razor
GO

Fuel Economy? What Fuel Economy?
GO

Paris Hilton’s Dogs Live in a Nicer House Than You Do
GO

India Reynolds is Naked
GO

Tits, Ass and a Pussy
GO

She is Gettin’ Her Webcam On Alright
GO

Jenna Jameson Looks Disgusting
GO

Aria Valentino is Working Out Topless
GO

Elephant Versus Ostrich
GO

I Don’t Care How Hot she Is, The More Megan Fox Talks, The Dumber She Looks
GO

Partly Cloudy Looks Kind of Awesome
GO

Creepy Dirty Video….
GO

Brad Pitt Obviously Has More Money Than He Knows What to Do With
GO

Now Here’s a Red Head I Could Get Into
GO

Cheers to You, Prick
GO

The Biggest Cleavage Collection You’ll See All Day
GO

NSFW Rear-View Mirror to Cover Your Perv Ass
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

10

Jun

Gisele’s Naked Body Tattooed in a Magazine of the Day

The only thing more disgusting than one of those inked up alternative models naked and pierced and tattooed for guys who have no standards because those whores have no business being naked, but only have business being whores, because whores don’t have to be hot, they just have to get naked for sites like suicide girls, is supermodels who look like dudes naked and pretending to be tattooed.

Posted in:Gisele Bundchen|Naked|Tattoo

2009

10

Jun

Posh Spice and Her Fat Nipple of the Day

Posh Spice’s nipple is hard, but not as hard as her stern look. She makes me feel like I’ve been a bad boy and that I am in trouble, a lot like my foster mother did when I was growing up. Only difference is that my foster mother used to make me eat her out everytime I did something wrong, or sometimes she’d get me to slide my 10 year old arm up inside her, which I thought was weird, considering she was religious, but I guess when priests fuck little boys, there’s nothing wrong with other people of God doin’ it to and the one thing I can say is that I’m glad her husband just sat in the corner and jerked off and didn’t join in, cuz otherwise, shit woulda got weird and I’d be one of those weird molested kids you see crying on Oprah, where as Posh Spice doesn’t even know I exist.

Posted in:Hard Nipple|Posh Spice

2009

10

Jun

Fergie and Her Body Don’t Belong Together of the Day

I don’t understand what the what the deal is with Fergie’s head. I am not talking about the head she used to hustle when she was scrounging the LA streets for her next hit of meth, or the head that she used to get the Black Eyed Peas to hire her to make them famous, or the head she gives herself in the bathroom at night as part of her workout regimen, I am talking about the head on her body that belongs on a fuckin’ dude, and a body that belongs naked, in video, getting fisted, while squatting. It is tight, it is nice, it is worth fucking from behind…

Posted in:Fergie|Sparkles

2009

10

Jun

Kristin Cavallari Does the Heather Graham of the Day

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari|Ripped Dress

2009

10

Jun

Katy Perry is Cockteasing Me of the Day

Here is the hottest fucking picture I have ever seen of Katy Perry. Seeing her face down in the fucking grass like she had just been raped and killed, or really just killed, ideally a slow painful death, filled with agony as karma for the pain she has caused us with her career, is fucking hot to me, I seriously just came all over my dog’s little black face….

Posted in:Cocktease|Katy Perry

2009

10

Jun

Hayden Panettiere’s Hips Don’t Lie of the Day

Here is Hayden Panettiere and her weird looking hips, that I guess look like that because she doesn’t have enough leg to support her needs, so she’s busting out sideways, cuz it’s the only way to go. So she’s short, stalky and not really a girl I’d want to get with, unless I was touring with a circus, and she was the only realy pussy other thatn the bearded lady on the fuckin’ bus, so we are all forced to pass this bitch around, you know it’s lonely as a carni and you make do with what you’re given, not that I’ve ever been in a circus, or really turned down midget pussy, but sometimes it is nice to pretend.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Hips|Jeans

2009

10

Jun

Lindsay Lohan’s Lesbian See Through Slumber Party of the Day

I have this fantasy of lesbian slumber parties that involves a group of teenage girls having pillow fights in their boyshort underwear because I am fucking cliche and that’s what lesbian slumber parties are all about. You know that whole experimental bullshit where you can sit around the next day and giggle about how dykey you were the night before, but halfway into the fantasy that Katy Perry song comes on and I look to find the asshole who turned it on and it’s fucking’ Samantha Ronson in her hat djing the lesbian slumber party event, forcing me to jump off of the tree branch I am perched on, where I am peeping in on the lesbian slumber party because I wasn’t invited since I have a cock and because I am an old pervert who scares teenage girls having pillow fights in their boyshort underwear.

I feel like Lohan and Samantha Ronson’s slumber parties aren’t as eventful as the lesbian slumber parties I dream about, but I wouldn’t mind seeing it.

Posted in:Lesbian|Lindsay Lohan|See Through

2009

10

Jun

Who is Lorraine Kelly and Why is She Showing Us Up Her Skirt of the Day

This is some disgusting, 50 year old TV presenter from Scottish TV named Lorraine Kelly and she is showing off her junk to the world while riding a tank. I assume she’s just smitten with all the manly soldiers and trying to live out some fantasy, that lead her to no wear panties that day, knowing she’d get one of them to jump her if she showed her pussy just right, but I guess it could just be bad timing on her part and good timing on the pervert photographer’s part and all I can reallly think about is how many cocks have been in and out of that shit in the last 50 years and as disgusting as that thought is, it makes me want to dig in and have a taste, but that’s just because I’m not well mentally.

Point of all this is to say, I don’t see vagina and I don’t see panty, I just see some Barbie doll genitals and this whole post is really weird on my part…I’ll pull it together after lunch.

Posted in:Lorraine Kelly|Upskirt