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Archive for the Bikini Category

2008

16

Jun

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Ass in a Bikini of the Day

kim kardashian fat ass in a bikini

I feel a lot like Kim Kardashian today. I ate chinese food with a friends at 5 am last night and had fast food in the afternoon, I ate a bag of chips and about 12 beers throughout the day and this has been going on for a few months and I’ve lost buttons off all my pants, people refer to me as big guy more than they ever have, I have scars from where my jogging pant elastic waistband digs into my skin. My T-shirt barely works anymore more and exposes my backside when I sit, because there isn’t enough fabric to go around, and everyone can see my fat ass crack since I don’t wear underwear. It’s got to the point where mothers have come up to me and have asked me to pull up my pants because they find me inappropriate with the kids like I was R. Kelly.

Here is Kim Kardashian and her Junk Food Eating body up in her bikini again all because you like fat chicks.

Posted in:Bikini|Fat Ass|Kim Kardashian

2008

13

Jun

Kim Kardashian’s Fat Bikini Ass of the Day

Kim Kardashian is a fucking beast of a girl who shouldn’t be out in a bikini, but should be at home on her treadmill because that is not a hot fat ass, it is just a fat ass. Sure her and her sister both have pretty curvy bodies and big hips but at least her sister doesn’t break chairs when she sits down.

The thing I love about these pictures is the animal print front of her bikini, not because her vagina is a wild animal that can’t be tamed, but because no matter how little clothing she has on and no matter how much money she has in the bank, she’s still a fuckin’ piece of trash, a really overweight piece of trash.

Bonus – Kim Kardashian Maintaining her Body By Eating Ice Cream Cuz She’s Fat and Likes Putting Things in Her Mouth

Another BONUS – Pictures of her Fat Ass Shopping Earlier in the Week

Posted in:Bikini|Fat Ass|Kim Kardashian

2008

13

Jun

Rebecca Gayheart Rocks a Bikini of the Day

Rebecca Gayheart is known for running over and killing some kid and it’s nice to see that she’s been able to get over the guilt that comes with taking away a kids life by going on and living hers. So maybe that kid will never grow up and experience all the beautiful things life has to offer or become a doctor who saves lives, a millionaire who uses his money for curing diseases and famines or maybe even be a scientist who finds a solution for global warming and high gas pices, but at least Gayheart will have a tan.

Posted in:Bikini|Rebecca Gayheart

2008

13

Jun

Alex Curran Bikini Pictures of the Day

This is some wife of a Soccer Player named Alex Curran and by the looks of it, her husband seems to be doing the physical activity for the two of them because this bitch is sloppy. You’d figure that when you’re an athlete you’d put an importance on fitness and tight bodied girls to fuck would be standard, but the truth is these soccer players land coke addicted party sluts
that were groupy whores they met in clubs and who slowly worked their way up the social ladder with their vaginas, but I guess once she locked him down and got her retirement plan sorted out, she figured she could just let herself go and here’s the picture proof.

Posted in:Alex Curran|Bikini

2008

12

Jun

Phoebe Price has Some More Staged Bikini Pictures of the Day

Phoebe Price is still trying to ride the wave of finally making it onto the cover of some tabloid for having the most disgusting cellulite ridden legs, only this time she’s hired a photographer who does some touch-ups, I guess she’s finally realized the less clothes she wears the more people care about her and by people I mean me, because I encourage girls coming to terms with this obvious concept, even if they’re doing it about 25 years too late.

I remember when I was hanging out at an old folks home for kicks and I started talking to this crazy senile bitch who had a pretty stacked body for an old lady and she knew it because all the dudes in the home all tried to get up in her. She loved the attention and would play it up and when I suggested a Geriatric Wet T-Shirt contest she was the first one in line. Unfortunately, she drowned. I am just kidding, we got stopped before the fun went down and I was asked to never step food in the home again because my kind of volunteering is not one they appreciate, but I’ll never forget that little heartbreaker who was a literal heartbreaker because she killed at least more than one dude in her seductive, big breasted, cock teasing antics.

Posted in:Bikini|Phoebe Price

2008

11

Jun

Eva Herzigova in Her Bikini of the Day

I was never a fan of Eva Herzigova when she was modeling in the 90s, but that’s just because I wasn’t into skinny chicks back then and if I was, I probably wouldn’t be married to a very large vat full off fucking rancid pudding that is my wife, but I am into skinny chicks now and rightfully so, I guess I just evolve with the times like high fashion but not as expensive.

When I look at Eva Herzigova, I think of a time when I was a little smarter and instead of spending my days writing a website badly, I had big plans for myself. I had spent time with hookers and heard about this Mail Order bride service from communist countries and was doing everything I could to get up in that because as you know, I know a lot of desperate dudes would would be more than happy to buy happiness and by happiness I mean a permanent whore that they can call their wife.

I got so far as to meeting a few guys from the local Russian mob who were down to support my venture and would provide the girls who would be willing to be smuggled into America, the promised land of opportunity, if I set up the infrastructure. Now the word infrastructure in and of itself was intimidating because I am a lazy dude, so I just flaked out and went back to drinking but I heard they did really well with it, and even with the fall of communism, which I was hoping would put a damper on the business I like to think I was a forefather of but didn’t see a dime for, shit’s still going strong.

An elderly Eva Herzigova is probably the reason why, they just don’t make girls like this overhear, but they do make great fast food, so I guess it’s a trade off.

Posted in:Bikini|Eva Herzigova

2008

10

Jun

Mariah Carey is in a Bikini for Her New Video of the Day

Mariah Carey is in a Bikini in her new video. These are the pictures. I would write more, but what’s the fuckin’ point. Sometimes things just are what they are and the only thing we can laugh about is how much she looks like a character from Planet of the Apes or some shit.

Posted in:Bikini|Mariah Carey|Video

2008

10

Jun

Alicia Douvall is Topless in a Bikini of the Day

All I know about this chick is that she’s from the UK and has a face like a plate of Bangers and Mash that can only be justified as the product of some Dairy Farm incest, but she’s topless and showing off her shitty sun burned fake tits that make these pictures about as sexually arousing as the pair of underwear I’ve been wearing all week because I have few options, kinda like any guy that happens to have sex with this slag. It’s one of those take what you can get when in a time of desperation, because it’s really the only way I can understand the fact that she’s got a kid.

During the Black Out 2008 that I experienced today, I ran into a couple HUGE girls on the street, I am talking substantially fatter than me and for some reason they were kickin’ it with some skinny blonde girl who looked just as sloppy as they did but wasn’t fat and took up less airplane seats when her deadbeat boyfriend saved enough money from selling dime bags of weed to take her somewhere special.

Either way, the busted up skinny chick was wearing this tight shirt and her tits were busting out because they were her only asset, or the only think she thought were her asset, because they really weren’t all that nice to look at and dudes were staring at her in amazement, that she thought was a positive thing and that’s why I feel like she’d really get along with this Alicia Douvall girl, together they could tell each other that they are the prettiest girls in the world, while everyone else kinda looks at them in disgusted amazement.

Posted in:Alicia Douvall|Bikini|Topless

2008

10

Jun

Phoebe Price’s Staged Bikini Pictures of the Day

My power went out a bunch of hours ago and I thought it was because I hadn’t paid my electricty bill and the company shut me down and I was happy because it re-affirmed my ghetto lifestyle, but then I walked outside and realized the whole block was out and that I wasn’t as much as a hurtbag as I thought I was.

My ghetto accomplishment, wasn’t much of an accomplishment at all and I think the same goes for Phoebe Price who got some press for being in a bikini candid shot showing off her fat legs and thought it was so fuckin’ amazing tht she made it to the cover of some tabloid magaine that she has has since staged a bunch of photoshoots with the paparazzi to relive those glory days, unfortunately she completely delusional and thinks that she made the cover because people want to fuck her and that delusion carried over into today’s pictures where she’s trying to exude sex, when shit should just be covered up and not cover material.

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Posted in:Bikini|Phoebe Price

2008

10

Jun

Helena Christensen’s Topless Bikini of the Day

Comments Off on Helena Christensen’s Topless Bikini of the Day

Supermodel of the past, Helena Christensen is out in a bikini in Miami and she’s decided to let her tits out to tan like every good Euopean girl should. I guess it’s safe to say that she’s been keeping up her habits of not eating, snorting cocaine and whatever else she did when she was relelvant because here body is still tight, so tight that a gay dude from the band Interpol would get with her because he doesn’t want the bad press and because if he closes his eyes and visualizes, her pussy feels about as tight as a man’s asshole. At least that’s the story I heard.

Posted in:Bikini|Helena Chistensen|Topless|Uncategorized