SFW Archives - Page 1114 of 1171 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2015

28

Jul

Lindsay Lohan has a Book and this is the Teaser of the Day

A video posted by Lindsay Lohan (@lindsaylohan) on Jul 25, 2015 at 4:14pm PDT

So the caption of this video is “Teaser for my Book BTW”…and I only realized that when pulling this to post and say…

Lindsay Lohan has lost her fucking mind, she went from Disney Star, to crackhead, to sugar baby with rich people funding her broke ass, to instagram model…and now to person who doesn’t even know how to use social media, and accidentally post videos that they accidentally made by clicking record on their phone, in their pocket, that for some unknown reason got pushed to instagram, with caption…something that actively takes work to do…probably ambien…

I don’t see how this glitchy visual, that maybe she thinks looks cool, when sedated, is a teaser for anything but how she need to hire a creative director, even if she’s working on a budget…

But I guess the good news is that her book is happening, and from my experience people crazed from Syphilis, or having their childhood stolen from them, whatever the reason, as long as they are crazy…makes for good jokes…something I guess Lohan’s been good for too…

All this to say, I can’t wait for it to become the lifetime movie, but I guess we’ll have to wait for her to die for that…it’ll happen in your lifetime..I’m sure.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2015

28

Jul

Tom Cruise Does the Weeknd on Tonight Show of the Day

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I hate Jimmy Fallon, and I assume that everyone with a brain, that leaves out probably 90 percent of America who watch Jimmy Fallon, becasue his schoolyard games speak to their retard brains, I mean these are the people who still watch cable…or Network Television..I guess they exist..

However, I don’t mind when Tom Cruise plays along with the bullshit when he’s trying to get attention to some billion dollar movie he’s going to make 100s of millions of dollars on….it’s both funny what these people will do for money, and charismatic, because Tom Cruise is just one of those actors who lights up a room in his Cult living, possibly cult leading, famous as fuck, ways….

I guess what I’m saying is that I like the caricature that Tom Cruise is…I mean is he human….in his amazing…or does he just not give a fuck…or is he just a calculated and intense celebrity…

What I I can’t stand is Jimmy Fallon, giggling to himself in shock that his life has brought him here, lip synching with celebs, becuase it is so absurd, and his trolling on us works, or he’s really just enjoying himself in his school yard made for adults retardness you’d probably beat up if he suggested any of these things at your house when hanging…it’s like “Don’t invite Jimmy to the dinner party, that guy’s the worst and will make us play his spin on games, like Pin the Tail on the Donatella Verscae, instead of Pin the Tail on the Donkey, because his comedy is sophisticated like that”…

Either way, this has been too much analysis on Jimmy and the fact that he’s just too fucking excitable….I mean his name is fucking Jimmy…and that takes away from Tom Cruise’s level of awesome.

Posted in:SFW|Tom Cruise

2015

28

Jul

Kate WInslet Recreates Titanic of the Day

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I guess this will be a fetish to a few people…

The first being Titanic fans as that movie touches all you faggots by the heart…and just sucks you into a fast paced one night stand…that you carry around in your miserable life wondering “what if he didn’t die”…but never letting that stop you from living your life, because let’s be real you met dude the day before he died for you, and he was poor….it would never have worked for a sugar baby…

The second being for Kate Winslet fans, because despite being an old mom…she’s got tits…..

The third being dudes who like girls who are tied, restrained and can’t run away from their needs and wants…

All this to say, this is better than Steve Aoki making the Titanic Song and EDM / Dub Step / Pile of Shit Song…that the next generation of kids 18 – 30 go crazy for, because the world may be doomed – but at least we can still watch Kate Winslet restrained…

Posted in:Kate Winslet|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Vanessa Hudgens in a Bikini Top with her Sick Dad of the Day

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Vanessa Hudgens posted this picture asking you to pray for her father…to collectively, positive energy, him…because I guess he’s sick, maybe dying and there’s nothing happy about that…

But I’m glad out of all the pics she probably has of her and her dad, she chose the one of her in her bikini top….

I wonder if that was her favorite pic with him, or if it was his favorite pic of them…you know for…inappropriate reasons…I mean genetic attraction is a real thing…

I guess it’s a little less busty as her younger sister’s “Positive energy” post…

All this to say, this is a family I like, death and sickness is bad, but if she ever needs a stand in dad, that goes for both of them, they can come sit on my lap anytime….

Here’s some paparazzi pics of her CLICK HERE

Here’s some Stella Hudgens Big Tits…

Posted in:SFW|Vanessa Hudgens

2015

27

Jul

Jennifer Lopez Ass in a Tight Dress of the Day

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J.Lo is 100 fucking years old…

I guess she didn’t get the message, or didn’t want you to think she is, even though she knows that latinas can do no wrong, they don’t even need to speak spanish as long as they identify with being latina, she’s got loyal fans for life….really the only time latinas aren’t loyal, is when you get caught looking at another woman, at which point they violently cut off your penis….normal right…

So in not wanting to accept her age or pile of fucking money, here’s her “birthday” outfit…and botoxed face…and apparently people are into talkng about this, when I am more into encouraging retirement…because every dance her old lady hips shake their way into…I get more and more offended…

But she’s still got a great ass..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:J.Lo|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Katy Perry for Vogue China of the Day

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The latest in Katy Perry news is that she’s still an overrated, talentless con artist who has won with her brain washing music, that just gets into all our heads for no reason other than scientific formulas created by the record label to encourage consumption…

She’s also recently reportedly single from John Mayer, a dude girls locally have told me was into ass eating before ass eating was cool, when ass eating was something that would throw off a girl when you asked her to do it after a show, ever those they’d still do it, because he was famous and chose them to go backstage with him, that’s what fans are supposed to do…

Well, like all recently single girls, she’s on a mission to get revenge and I guess, doing obscure market Vogue, with your big tits, even though you can do all markets of VOgue, you’re Katy Perry….

I guess what I’m trying to say is that she’s half naked and doesn’t look nearly as fat as she does in person…

Here’s the video…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Katy Perry|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Britney Spears in a Bikini of the Day

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Britney Spears posted this bikini pic in Hawaii where she is on some family vacation or some shit, and I guess she should be in her bikini, because her body is pretty fucking rocking, reminding everyone that if you’re medicated and controlled by people who need you to finance their lives, they can control your food intake, or put you on a treadmill where they walk you for days at a time, while feeding you diuretics, and holding a back of cheetos in front of your face, even though the cheetos Britney Spears jokes are as played out as her ripping lines of the cheetos dust, but when it’s part of someone’s everything, it’s hard to ignore..

ANd I guess when she looks like this…it’s hard to ignore the mom body…that’s tight enough for me…which is more than you can say about her vagina…2 kids..and I assume K-Fed, based on his laziness and ability to be set for life, coupled with all his half black babies with black girls…prove…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Michelle Rodriguez Grinding a Pole of the Day

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Here’s bisexual, possibly monkey, Michelle Rodriguez, riding a pole…which must be pretty rough on her balls…

I am half the man she is, and I know that that would kill my atrophied testicles….proving that she’s as tough as her biker shoulders look…

She also wore a bikini, awkward, like she was the Original Caitlin Jenner, only she didn’t wait until her testosterone dwindled naturally, rather than come out when she was at the top of her game and the number one athlete in the world…she has been consistent since day one…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Michelle Rodriguez|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Abbey Clancy in a Bikini of the Day

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Abbey Clancy, or Abigail Clancy as she was known professionally before she got involved in a cocaine scandal…is a WAG, which means soccer wife, which is something pretty major in Europe since Soccer is the biggest fucking thing..there are thousands of players and every cocktail waitress, low level model, stripper, and high school drop out with fake tits, seems to be one..

It’s good business to lock in a soccer player. You get to all the events, in the tabloids, and that’s way better than serving cocktails…

Soccer players are rich, so sugar baby that shit…right…Sugar baby is code for hooker….

She’s a “lingerie” model, and here are some pics of her ass that she posted, and ass I would possible finance if I was rich too…knowing I could always trade her in when she falls the fuck part at the seams when she hits 35.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Abbey Clancy|SFW

2015

27

Jul

Bill Cosby’s Victims New York Magazine Cover of the Day

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I tried soaking this magazine in sedatives….You know some vodka and prescription pills…and these girls didn’t look like anything you would would want to masturbate to…like most magazines…but Bill Cosby did…

This magazine is sad, and full of sexual assault victims, and you should not like or want anything to do with exually assault anything or anyone, but you’ve all heard dudes say “I’d fuck her, I’d fuck that, I’d fuck those tits”..that’s just one “no” away rape…depending how bad motherfucker wants it…or if he’s all talk….and I guess sexual predators go after whatever or whoever they think they are going to get away sexually assaulting….or maybe they go after people they feel led them to believe they weren’t sexually assualting and that they were actively partiicpating, who knows….

I am not surprised Cosby or really any male celebrity is a sexual predator. They are rich, and weird and have egos…and are fucked up…

So the whole thing is as disgusting as you’d expect, 40 or more victims coming forward now, when they could have done it a long time ago, but wouldn’t have been believed, which is why isn’t he in jail.

It happened in an era where rape victims sucked it up…so be happy that the fucker is getting dragged through the mud, that wasn’t a black joke, and getting what he will deserve, because maybe this will bring some awareness to these celebrity dudes who get away with murder….because they are celebrities and can buy their way out of shit…and have egos and god complexes and think they can get away with murder….and girls who throw themselves at them…Bring the fuckers down..

I am just surprised that he isn’t being charged as a child molester, like a Hockey Coach or Choir Leader, because I would have expected him to have been a child molester with the whole having a master’s in education, being a child educator, doing the Fat Albert, JELLO Commercial, Kids Say the Darndest Things…thing…

What I am saying at…is Bill Cosby has always been creepy….

Here’s the story HERE , it’s important…fuck this guy…

Here’s the some Zoe Kravitz…

Posted in:Bill Cosby|SFW