SFW Archives - Page 844 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2016

21

Jul

Kelly Brook’s Lookin’ Like Grimace of the Day

I like her version vs the paparazzi version

Kelly Brook is a fat chick, who is pretty much fatter than ever, but quite possibly as fat as she’s always been, I’ve only met one dude who either fucked her or knew people who fucked her and he was very vocal at how misleading her pictures are and how disgusting she actually is, or was, in her 20s, pretty much 20 years ago, when she was still in the UK fucking Rugby players…

I just find it interesting that in a plus sized model era, she finally come out as the plus sized she’s been struggling with her entire career, not that she’s a real model, just a Glamour titty model, the lower hanging fruit with big tits willing to show off her big tits….kind of model…and I don’t even think she’s worked as a titty model for years…she’s just been riding that wave like any dude who has fucked her has ridden her waves cuz she’s jiggly as fuck….

I find it interesting a how she knows her fucking angles hard, how to pose, the paparazzi versions of her versus her picture of herself are about 75 lbs heavier….making me question whats real anymore…everything is a lie…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kelly Brook|SFW

2016

21

Jul

Emily Osment Handstand of the Day

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Emily Osment is in a bikini doing a handstand….because I guess she wants to show the world her ass upside down – because why else would she post a picture of her in a bikini doing a handstand – for her own personal collection? Right…

I like to make fun of Emily Osment because I just assume she is Haley Joel Osment from the Sixth Sense after his sex change…in efforts to keep his youthful success alive…because everyone knows child stars are fucked in the head and do fucked up shit the second they aren’t cute anymore…you know dude was nominated for an oscar at 10 or some shit…and it went all down hill for him…peaking at 10 sucks…so he decides to reinvent himself as a chick and have a second stab at a career….

But people get bored when I keep saying the same thing…Jokes. No one actually reads this site…

Posted in:Emily Osment|SFW

2016

21

Jul

Alessandra Ambrosio Ass in a Bikini of the Day

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Skinny – mid 30s – mom – Brazilian – Alessandra Ambrosio is on some yacht in a bikini with a bunch of other models, because this is what models do when they aren’t getting paid too much money to stand around in a bikinis or half naked or whatever it is they do.

It’s nice to see these women pool their money together to have a fun girl’s vacation – I mean if you can afford it, why not take advantage!

Right? I mean there is no way that they are guests of some Billionaire….because they are power women and can pay their own damn bills…

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2016

21

Jul

Sarah Hyland’s Cleavage of the Day

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Sarah Hyland got tits, or is working on angles that show off her tits, because she’s from a culture, at least in her career and her upbringing, which are one in the same thing – that put a whole lot of focus on tits, whether it is her TV mom Sofia Vergara who made a career as an immigrant off her tits, or her sister on the show Ariel Winter who also had big tits, huge tits, that need to be cut off at 17 tits…giving this Sarah Hyland a complex, some insecurities, because when they are at the top of their game on a hit show that they’ve been on since kids, they don’t realize it…and focus on silly things like how to get their tits more attention…..

TO SEE PICS OF HER LEAVING STARBUCKS IN SHORTS BECAUSE YOU ARE HER BIG FAN….

CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sarah Hyland|SFW

2016

21

Jul

Em Rat Cow in a Bikni Getting Work of the Day

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Em Rat Cow is relatively uninteresting across the board. It’s one of those what more can we ask for or want from a girl who we’ve seen completely nude so many times that it is the only reason we know she exists…

Yes, she’s got a hot body, but when I see her doing anything besides the low level softcore porn she’s known for, I feel like I’m experiencing a stripper at a job interview at the grocery store to be a cashier…or bag girl…it’s like “bitch, get the fuck out of here”….only I guess “bikini” pics are in line with her nude pics – it all falls under the umbrella of instagram model – even if she’d never consider herself an instagram model – she probably tells people she’s an actress and hands out business cards with her IMDB profile on her vagina…like some kind of escort.

I don’t hate her, I just find her pretty repetitive, boring, uneventful…and uninspiring…step it up. Stop the yard.

Posted in:Emily Ratajkowski|SFW

2016

20

Jul

Miley Cyrus Still Lives of the DAy

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I think it is important to celebrate Miley cyrus whenever she brings out her character Miley after putting it in storage when she went back to her future husband to live the semi normal life on their pile of money – because like all these other idiots – she is also a media manipulator – totally not authentic – fake tumblr weird – but naked – which makes any and all intentions irrelevant so long as she’s naked…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW

2016

20

Jul

Lady Gaga Bikini Nightmare of the DAy

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Lady Gaga is being ousted as a Taylor Swift, you know a media manipulating cunt who lies and creates an illusion by polarizing their story into something marketable – and really committing to said lie…the kind of girl who cheats on people, slits some throats and turns the story into a “poor me”…when the real victim is viewers like us, forced to listen to every fucking song they create on repeat – to the point we know the lyrics – which basics confuse for liking the song – while people like me just get mad about it…because it’s garbage – manipulative and she’s not that hot…

My only Gaga story is that years ago – I fondled her ass when she was in a VIP area at a club, fully on sexual assault mode – but not because it turned me on, it was more a grab her ass – see if she reacts and she didn’t so keep grabbing her ass – like a creeper….but a creeper with taste because throughout her career her only redeeming quality has been that ass…

THE FUNNY THING in my rapey hand grabbing Gaga story is that I wasn’t even in the VIP, she didn’t even know I was grabbing her ass, we never even met and she just didn’t react..which to me was her consent…but everytime she cries about sexual assault and victims – I know I did something that wasn’t rape at the time – but that today – the feminists at the college level would go crazy about…KINDA FUNNY…

I guess what I am saying is Gaga’s tears for victims are lies, she actually likes sexual assault, it’s gotta be the only reason her career happened – because that face is terrifying…

Posted in:Lady Gaga|SFW

2016

20

Jul

Rita Ora Nipple Tape VS Benson Nipple of the Day

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Rita Ora nipple tape is pretty offensive, bold, cocky of her…it’s like now that she’s booked a hosting job on TV, she feels like she doesn’t need to be a shameless exhibitionist, but rather, just imply that she’s an exhibitionist by basically putting a neon sign on her nipples to remind everyone looking that the nipples are there – without seeing the nipples – because she likes to keep a little mystery, now that she thinks she can, instead of just remembering showing her nipples the other day / week / month – we have seen all her nudes …but I guess that was before she was a network TV girl on America’s Next top model….back when she was still prostituting herself to rich guys to give her hit songs…she’s never had….who knows…

Maybe she should take the lead from hard nippled Ashley Benson, just don’t take her diet advice…

TO SEE THE REST OF BENSON NIPS CLICK HERE

Yes, I’m a grown man…

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2016

20

Jul

Britney Spears is a Mom in a Bikini of the Day

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Britney Spears is an inspiration to us all – you know that not only can you have a kid that if you are tactical about can become your full time job, put the pressure to earn on them, and if the stars align because of their cuteness or their ability to dance at Disney Auditions thanks to Jazz Ballet classes…you can live the good fucking life…and when she’s over 18 and you’re feeling the burn from spending your earnings you made off of her faster than you thought – now that you’re cut off – and she coincidentally starts doing crazy shit that allows you to institutionalize her and take control of her – she can keep earning for you for decades to come. People rely on her.

More interestingly, she proves that you don’t have to be a model bitch with a Victoria’s Secret contract to cold dick, sometimes you can find that rich broken girl to seduce with your dick, so you better have a big dick, that you can knock her up with after a little brainwashing so that you secure – a retirement plan and never have to work again – thanks to the enough money to go around all thanks to this tight enough mom body in a bikini.

I am a fan..

Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2016

20

Jul

Shannen Doherty Cancer Downer Slideshow of the Day

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Wow…Shannen Doherty really knows how to pick up all our spirits with this photo series of her shaving her head due to breast cancer she’s been treating like an asshole by not cutting off her tits – at least that’s what I read somewhere – because I guess cancer is traumatic and you don’t want to jump to conclusions and cut the fucking shit out of you – you want to take treatment that doesn’t cut it out of you and ride it out hoping it disappears…

I don’t know anything about oncology – or about breast cancer other than that it is the enemy for targeting my friend – the breast….I know people die from this shit, and it is very possible that Shannen Doherty will die from this shit, so documenting the journey is less about fame whoring and more about therapy…awareness…who knows…I just know it’s not tits, not nudity, not panty flashes, but rather someone you probably jerked off to at least once – fighting for her life – publicing – it’s pretty fucking depressing…but I guess then again, so is life…you know since we’re all dying.

Posted in:SFW|Shannen Doherty

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