DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

26

Jul

Lindsay Lohan is EVERYTHING and MORE….or at least Eating Everying and MORE of the Day

Lindsay Lohan may not work out. She may not be the healthiest of people. She may be sloppy as fuck, with a belly hanging out of her one piece bathing suit…all while being medicated on whatever it is she medicates herself with….but at least she’s still alive, because for the longest time we all assumed she would just give into her inner demons, brought on by evil parents, and off herself…but instead she’s living and that in and of itself…even when not tight bodied…is a gift…

Her pasty white skin may look like it is smeared with dog shit, but those are just her freckles…but she is wonderful and a gift…

Her hard nipples on her great big, now for a reason because she’s taken up eating…is more than just erotic…it is everything…like they can feed a nation of starving babies….babies that her uterus look like she’s filled with….they give me hope…of a better tomorrow.

Her ass melting away…but she’s 30…and thanks to her wrecked from surgeries and filler face…it’s just acting 46 and haggard like the rest of her…

She’s like a hot wife we married getting old…without having brought your children to the world…so you don’t have that same respect for the getting old…but you still don’t mind it since you get to jerk off to other girls…even though you know it your heart…that this is home…a very broken down and battered home…one that brings out repressed memories but still home…

Lohan..is all that is good in the world…the OG Bella Thorne…and I still feel connected at the soul with her..

Here she is in video:

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

26

Jul

Miley Cyrus in a Bikini Top with her Weird Busty Stage Mom of the Day

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The most interesting thing about Miley Cyrus is not that she’s some hipster shape shifting weirdo who went off the deep end and became this colorful real life tumblr account thanks to her management…positioning it as her finding herself…when really it was her finding an angle to market herself…because weed doesn’t turn people into NEON loving new-hippies naked and living the MEME life…it’s just weed…but interesting angle…considering how many records it sold, how much money it made, before she scaled the fuck back and turned normal, with just a few weirdo tattoos to remind her of the day she scammed her fans…because she’s a vapid Disney kid and all they know is how to be dancing monkeys that get paid…

The interesting thing about Miley Cyrus is her mom, who looks like a strip club waitress, or stripper, that got knocked up a month or two after Achy Breaky Heart was released and who stuck the fuck around and rode it out as hard as she could with Billy Ray because he brought the good life…and she had commodities to raise…

Hanna Montana yo…she’s got the EARNER money Making Pussy…from getting rich dude cum in it, to making rich girls with that cum…briliant…

Well, they are togetehr in Malibu…Miley in a Bikini top because it’s summer and she’s fit and looking’ good…and Mom in a T-shirt with her fake tits…also looking good because if she didn’t Billy Ray, who likely fucks other trashy girls, it’s the Southern rich trash way….living the AMerican Dream.

Here she is doing YOGA…EROTIC…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|SFW

2017

26

Jul

Liz Hurly Foot Fetish / Bikini Pics of the Day

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Liz Hurley has been a wallet fucking opportunist since before she had a career, which is partially why she has a career.

She stuck with homosexual Hugh Grant for a decade of his career, as he became a heart throb in America and she took down numbers of all the people he met along the way…so that when the right time hit…she could escort them…get them to invest in her bikini line…and even act in movies on her own…proving acting is pretty easy…before Hugh was caught with a Tranny and her Uterus was filled with rich guy sperm…

She’s still pushing the bikini thing looking good enough for all of us who remember her being the hottest late 90s thing…and the 90s are back…even when the pussy we liked is 90…

Either way, jerk off to her old lady flipper feet…

Posted in:Liz Hurley|SFW

2017

26

Jul

Sierra SKye Bolt On Tits and Weird Instagram Body of the Day

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Sierra Skye is a nobody, who you could have got to post your skinny tea for 500 dollars about a year ago, but who wised up and increased her hooker rates to 10,000 or more per post, because she’s just that popular, likely in Russia or wherever she is buying her followers from, but the interesting thing about seeing this real life picture of her, is seeing just how fucking weirdly shaped she is, how mutilated her face is, on some typical, common, all the girls are doing it kick…of shaping their body into some kind of creepy instagram filter or facetune/photoshop filter by sucking fat out of the stomach, putting it in the ass, getting bolt on looking tits, and jacking up their face…not looking anything like they did two years ago, carried away with the IG dream..because it’s all they have going for them…it’s fucked up…but it happens all the time..this is the normal…and they are all going to age so fucked up, while looking so fucke dup..but check out the tits…because we like tits…another trend that comes with this body mulilation that everyone’s doing in their vain disgusting vapid existences…

GUTTER..but she thinks she’s an “influencer”…or content creator curating her life..the world is dumb..but it did get me talking about her…proving yet again that nipples win all wars.

Posted in:Sierra Skye

2017

26

Jul

Reality Show Garbage Audrina Patridge in a Bikini for Old Times of the Day

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I guess Audrina Patridge wants you to remember who she is…because in her heart of hearts she doesn’t think of herself in the same way the rest of the world who still remember her think of her…a one hit wonder reality show piece of shit who isn’t even that hot…but who is fit…

She thinks of herself as a mom, a social media personality who was able to leverage her reality show fame back when that shit kind of mattered, she was spoiled, got fake tits at 16, was from one of those households…so accepting that she’s nothing but garbage that won some kind of lottery is probably difficult…

So to get that feeling of mattering, people caring, hoping that the tabloids pick up her post baby body…she’s staged paparazzi pics and they are not hot…but they happened and that is better than nothing…or is it? I don’t know it’s all bullshit to me.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Audrina Partridge|SFW

2017

26

Jul

Bella Hadid VS Gigi Hadid in Black Leggings of the Day

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Here are a couple of pictures of rich trash that are both overrated “it girls” for whatever reason – getting paid by big athletic brands to be caught by the paparazzi leaving their houses in NYC – because it’s good marketing….

Gigi and her cameltoe for Reebok..

Bella and her fake jog that is really a job or part of campaign for Nike…look at how SWEATY and out of breath she looks…REAL fitness…that Nike is pumping millions of dollars into RIGHT here…an athlete…who doesn’t do fitness….idiots.

How are they going to even look at each other at Thanksgiving with this kind of rivalry….

Gigi will throw the Turkey at Bella, calling her a coat tail rider, while neither of them really care because they don’t eat, they just like cigarettes and diet cokes…or is one into pepsi while the other drinks coke…leading to more family feuds…while her dad finger bangs some model on the table…as three others wait their turn…magic wallet fingers…and the mom continues to teach the girls how to whore themselves..but showing them hot to pose in their underwear for their social media….like she did the other day…

The stress these kids go through…so rough….at least you know they think it is…but it’s all for good…not evil..you know…if you consider rich kids who do nothing with their lives or for the world “good”…when really that vapid, garbage materialistic behavior is really just evil…..

Posted in:Bella Hadid|Gigi Hadid|SFW

2017

26

Jul

This is What I Am Masturbating To Right Now of the Day

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I find it interesting, but not really, that people like to tell each other what TV show they are watching, what series they are really into, what book they are reading, what they are doing throughout the day…

But rarely do people share what they masturbate to, I mean sometimes a girl you sext will send you a video she came to, and sometimes a friend will tell you he jerked off to some old high school year books he found at a garage sale, but for the most part…I don’t tell you what I am jerking off to ever…until today because today….I am jerking off to this golden whatever it is…Phoebe Price…my queen..I don’t think she could be any more perfect…

Posted in:Phoebe Price|SFW|Videos

2017

26

Jul

Taylor Hill Overrated White Girl with hot Daphne Groeneveld Models on Yachts of the Day

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Taylor Hill is a little boring…but she’s with Daphne Groeneveld who is hot…and I guess their rich and dialed in older boyfriends…because these yachts don’t come free…unless some shit got swindled hard in the negotiations that made the yacht company absorb the yacht cost to have two hot models on the yacht…but either way…whether rich dudes they fuck pay, or rich dudes who own the yacht are gifting cuz they want hot pussy on bikinis on the yacht…they are still hookers to me…and I guess my oopinion is the only one that matters since I am the only one here reading this…but not actually… it’s more being shat out of my mouth than anything really…

But this Daphne Groeneveld…she’s pretty amazing….I am that round ass…is amazing…and I love young girls with round assese…there just seem to be so many around..and I want to be best friends with ALL of them.

Posted in:Daphne Groeneveld|SFW|Taylor Hill

2017

26

Jul

Hannah Ferguson’s Possible Pussy for LOVE of the DAy

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Hannah Ferguson is a little naked – but not naked enough….because naked enough is never quite enough, as a pervert I want to see naked always…

This is for LOVE magazine, who I guess think she’s worth stripping down naked for their naked issue that we’ve already seen top tier pussy like RAT COW And Barbara Palvin naked in…

Seeing them go down the list of potential models to get naked for their shoot, and ending up on this Sports Illustrated chick may confuse me….it’s like get whoever we can who has done any little amount of mainstream work…and ending up here makes no sense…I mean she really is a no one…a naked no one..and sometimes that’s all the sense you need any of this to make…

I just want to know where her nipples are…I mean that and her actual straight up labia…and I’m not talking about whatever the fuck that thing on her head is that she probably considers edgy or artistic…I’m talking about the other wrinkly lips on her other head…the pussy head…I don’t know where I am going with this..but take it all in..in case it is in fact genius prose and not just me shitting out of my mouth because my hemorrhoid is too painful for me to shit out of my ass…

Posted in:Hannah Ferguson

2017

26

Jul

Ashley Tisdale Weird Face Butt Shorts of the Day

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I think we can all agree that despite Ashley Tisdale’s weird, barely famous or relevant in her fame thanks to High School Musical pretty much dying and her not really moving on, ugly, botched Plastic Surgery face….doesn’t really matter and isn’t all that bad when she’s wearing shorts that show her ass cheeks…a trend most 30 somethings don’t follow – but that I am fine with them following when they aren’t fat – because ass cheek exposing shorts are everything..

Earlier today, I spent 10 minutes watching a group of young girls taking selfies and social media pics of each other, and all were in ass cheek exposing shorts, reminding me that you can never have too much ass cheek exposing shorts, be happy it’s a trend, because it’s hot enough to eliminate ugly faces…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|SFW