Sometimes when I leave my house I just crave topless dancers and every girl who I walk by, I imagine what they would look like naked, what their capabilities on stage would be, like whether they would would be shy at first and slowly warm up, or if they would be the kind of girl who just goes buck fucking wild, or the girl you think would be wild but slowly parades herself like she’s at a slave auction, only instead of being good at getting beat into pickin’ cotton and other chores, she’s good at not killing herself after being degraded by men all day.
All this to say that I think of topless dancers a lot and never have I thought about whatever the fuck is goin on in this video and I guess that’s what makes it a stepDAYDREAM. Enjoy.
I am not drunk yet and that is a travesty. I’ve been in bed tending to my male yeast infection all night. That’s not entirely true. I just tell girls it’s a male yeast infection cuz it sounds more appealing than Aids Lesion. I don’t know what I am talking about, I just know tonight is the night dreams are made of, let’s just hope your dreams don’t involve hunting me down and killing me violently and painfully.
Here are my stepLINKS.
Rene Zelwegger Forgot to Put on a Shirt….Why? I Don’t Know, But I do Blame Tom Cruise! That Jerry Maguire Shit was the Devil….. GO
I know a maintenance man in Boston who was at working at some conference and Pam Anderson was one of the “stars” who was there promoting some bullshit product and doing some autograph signing/meet and greet/ anything for money and dude told me she looked like a haggard piece of expired meat you find in the back of your fridge, not sure if you’ll die if you eat it, so you just throw it out and this motherfucker is known to have pretty bad fuckin’ taste in women, making me think the disgusting mess you see in these pictures, is only a fraction of the disgusting mess she actually is, as pictures tend to know show off the plastic surgery scar or scent of AIDS.
I am not sure why she’s with some chachi 14 year old soccer lookin’ dude, maybe it’s her son with Tommy Lee, who is clearly really fuckin’ rock and roll, like his dumpster parents, I mean if rock and roll was Homosexulaity on the beaches of Greece…
Here she is at some Press Conference….and by “she” I mean here are her hard nipples at a Press Conference….
The great thing about being the black guy all the white girls want to fuck from CSI is that all the white girls still want to fuck you when you are on the beach, especially when you are with some hot bodied bitch in her bikini, because girls are catty and competitive and want whatever the other girls want, or whatever the other girls have and they put up a fucking fight for the shit not caring if the bitch they are steppin up on is their best friend or not.
So if you want to have the best sex in your life, you need to hire a whore to follow you around all night, acting like you are sent from fucking god, so other girls jump in to try to win you away from the bitch, but that really only works if they recognize you from TV or are rich, because girls are groupies, and don’t fight for nobodies who have acne and smell like cum from all the chronic masturbation problem.
Rosario Dawson who was known to have fatty tits, seems to have fatty everything else. Maybe she’s staring in some movie about a fat chick, or maybe she’s just let herself go cuz she’s found love and is dating this motherfucker. She’s not disgusting just yet, at least not on the surface, for all I know she could have a rotting cunt, like the stripper I had my way with last night who although had a doughy stomach made for mother’s of three and an ass that looked like a burn victim and smelled like a septic tank, her tits were spectacular. Only difference is my stripper knew how to dance, while Rosario Dawson just sits there lookin like she’s made it, forgetting her roots as a poor immigrant squatting in NYC, unfortunately not the kind of squatting I can masturbate to….
Here she is in her bikini…
Even her boyfriend is shocked how fat his chick’s ass has gotten….he’s thinkin’ that someone’s gotta stop feeding her and it’s not gonna be him cuz he’s too busy riding her coattails and fuckin’ her wallet.
And here’s her friend’s ass….
And here are some boring pictures of Rosario Dawson and her boyfriend walking….if you’re not too into the bikini pictures above….
You don’t know awkward like surfing the net for Kayden Kross porn because I love her and coming across a live broadcast from May where her and her stunt cock are talking about me.
I have no memory of ever asking her to ask me to marry her, considering I am married, but I guess that could be something I would do, even though I’d rather just take her out to dinner and a movie and treat her like the lady I know she is behind that whole pornstar front.
So even though her marriage proposal wasn’t sincere, it’s nice to know she likes me for being an asshole because I like her for having an asshole or at least a vagina she treats like an asshole by lettin’ all kinds shit get caught up in it, even though it’s a premium luxurious delicacy that should only be savored by me. Even though the most Luxurious thing I’ve ever had was jar of brand name mustard.
I have a friend who I met on the internet and never in person. He used to be in some random shitty 80s movies and TV shows like Ski School, and Summer School and even Ski School 2 and nothing much since. We’ve been going back and forth the last 3 years and dude is always supportive, which is a nice change from all the hate mail I get constantly.
His most recent email included this clip from some movie called Parfection that may bring him back to the D-List that was so rudely taken from him and it is about boobs, so you’ll like it, because your small mind loves boobs, and even if the jokes are as tight as the girls, who are not very tight….I got no choice but to give love.
Tons of shitty movies get made and go straight to DVD, but I’m proud to say that this one stars a serious star, the world just doesn’t know it yet. So check out the clip and start writing fan mail cuz right now he’s got plenty of time to answer it, but won’t in the months to come as he is too busy fighting off boy band volume of pussy.
I am pretty upset. My angle on this Kristin Cavallari chick was mocking the fact that she thought she was too good for The Hills after Laguna beach because she had an inflated ego and thought she’d get other work and not be typecast as the trashy rich kid on a shitty scripted show that is polluting our generation as pretty much the worst possible thing to come out of television in the history of television.
I just found out that she crawled back to MTV with her tail between her legs because she realized what a poor decision she made and is back on what we hope is the tail end of the show and since there is no future in the past and since I have no respect for girls who make these bold moves only to pathetically crawl back to the good thing they so emotionally and boldly walked away from. Not that I respect women. But you get what I mean. Cunts…
Here she is at some Malibu Beach House not wearing a bikini…but loving the attention she’s getting on her “Comeback” tour…that is almost as boring as her….
I was just sent this video about some Marilyn Monroe bra up for auction and I felt it was my duty to spread the word because I am the kind of guy who spends time in the thrift stores sniffing old panties, not just wondering if they’ve been washed and hoping they aren’t, but more importantly wondering if someone died in them. You know there’s a story behind every one of those fuckin’ pairs, a vagina that touched it, and the whole thing is amazing. I haven’t got too into bras yet, because I’m a pussy man, but figure dead chick bras from the 50s are a close second to dead chick panties. I mean it’s all in the lingerie family…ya know.
I heard Lohan was shooting an afterschool special like it was ’82 in hopes of bringing her career back to the great heights it once was at, or some shit but I could be wrong, because she ignores me and she is not answering my texts, like she was the Queen of England who doesn’t really grasp technology or someone who is at the top of her fuckin’ game which clearly she isn’t and should be nice to everyone because when she ends up on the street corner begging for change, she won’t want to be ignored.
Here is some pictures she did for GQ, I know I’ve seen them before, but I couldn’t find the shit on my site, so figured why not re-post them if I had. I figure we should celebrate her before she totally falls off the map….
