I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

09

Apr

Russell Brand’s Two Groupies Sneakin’ Out of His House Weirdness of the Day

Russell Brand is milking this fame shit by always rockin’ out with random groupies. These two girls I guess he was fucking in tandem, because that’s the power fame gives you, ran outside hiding under black robes to get something out of their car, because I am sure Brand has had his way with them from all fuckin’ angles.

I don’t have anything to really say about this, because who really cares. Girls are whores. Girls like famous dudes and why wouldn’t they. He’s got money, he’s not lookin’ for a wife, but they probably like giving him everything he wants in hopes that one day he’ll choose them and let them into his little world.

Who cares. Seriously. Why did I bother downloading these fucking pictures. Cropping them. Uploading them. When there’s nothing hot about them except whatever my imagination had lined up for them, but even that’s hard to pull off because all I see are their thick ankles, like we’re in some muslim country reporting the news in blackface….you like how I just tied that into an earlier post. Admit it was clever.

Posted in:Groupies|Russell Brand

2009

09

Apr

Heidi and Spencer Bring Their Bullshit Love to the Streets of the Day

Here are Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt livin’ up the lie that people believe because they have nothing better to do with themselves and the paparazzi are going nuts with the shit like these clowns are relevant. The other day, I hit them up on Twitter, because I use Twitter despite how gay it sounds and asked Spencer if he’s ever knocked Heidi up and he was pretty quick to say no. He went out of his way to tell me he hasn’t. He also said he has his own in the house they share, and that’s where he fucks Brody Jenner while Heidi is in the other room staring at her cunt self in the mirror. I want to hate these clowns, but I can’t, because everytime I dream about myself, I am played by Heidi Montag and have a feeling that means we’re soulmates, unfortunately, she has no soul….

Here they are trying to promote her new shit songs that Spencer pretends are the next big thing, while the rest of the world knows shit’s a fucking disaster….

Here’s the video of them working their bullshit for the paparazzi…

Posted in:Heidi Montag|Love|Publicity Stunt|Spencer Pratt

2009

09

Apr

Billy Ray Cyrus Gives Us the Finger for Disney of the Day

When I think about Disney, I don’t have thoughts of the most magical place on earth, I don’t have thoughts about Mickey and Minnie and all the other characters we all grew up on, I don’t think about my grandmother’s stories about how Walt Disney started up the company as an excuse to get close to little boys and girls, because back then pedophiles weren’t as hated as they are today, it was almost swept under the rug and apparently, he gave great orgasms.

I do think about Miley Cyrus, her millions and millions of dollars, so I am pretty offended when I see her dad, who is milking off the shit just as hard as his little slut daughter, giving us the finger. He should be giving us a two thumbs up with a huge smile on his face because dude’s fucked the system.

What kind of message is this sending to the kids.

Speaking of Kids, Oprah is on teenagers sucking dick, I’m talking 13 year olds. I always knew she was a kiddie porn smut peddler. All the rich folk are weird. They just said “feeling good about your genitals at a young age”. Wonder what that means. I am almost 40 and never felt good about my genitals. Mainly due to the smell and scabs….

And a little Miley for the perverts….

Posted in:Billy Ray Cyrus|Finger|Rude

2009

09

Apr

Kim Kardashian and Her Fat Friend Show Off Their Tits at the Basketball Game of the Day

Kim Kadashian brought her fat friend to the basketball game to find black dudes because black dude like big titty fat chicks and big titty fat chicks apparently like black dudes, as long as they are pro athletes, it doesn’t matter what sport they are pro in, just as long as they are pro. Groupie whores. Do I really need to write about this on a daily fucking basis, couldn’t I be at a fucking basketball game, or in the fucking gutter with rich chicks with big tits, and not on a computer writing nonsense about nonsense. Unfortunately, I am too fucking lazy. Somebody. Save Me….

Posted in:Brittany Gastineau|Fat|Kim Kardashian|Tits

2009

09

Apr

Jeremy Piven and Some Jose Canseco Ex Wife of the Day

Sloppy Seconds!! I guess what it comes down to is that everyone is sloppy seconds, shit just becomes weirder when the bitch is a divorcee, you know with their baggage, their kids, with their herpes Canseco brought home from Away Games. The only thing good about them is that they are so emotionally detached and like to fuck enough to call on you every couple of days to fill their 35 year old sexual peakin’ pussy, you know when they aren’t too busy fucking the 8 other dudes she’s got on the side, including the ex husband who she still sucks off when he drops off the kids after taking them for the weekend, because they’ve got history. Either way, based on her legs and pussy area, I’d get up on that like I was Jeremy Piven too.

Posted in:Jeremy Piven|Jose Canseco

2009

09

Apr

Some Lindsay Lohan Leg of the Day

I love Lindsay Lohan. She is hot and I don’t think she’s too skinny, there is no such thing as too skinny, that’s just something fat chicks say to make them feel good about themselves, the same fat chicks who aren’t fucking you.

Sure, I thought she was going to die this year. I thought that it would be suicide or cardiac arrest, but I’m over all that. I am convinced she’s ready for the takeover she’s been laying the groundwork for the last few years and that this relationship with Ronson and this breakup with Ronson is all part of some master plan we’ll all understand one day.

If anyone is gonna die, it’s gonna be me, I’ve had a cough for fucking days and I think the end is near. At least I’ve lived long enough.

Here is the video..

Posted in:Legs|Lindsay Lohan

2009

09

Apr

Doutzen Kroes in Some Clothed Modeling Pics of the Day

Doutzen Kroes some hot bikini/lingerie model is doing a photoshoot in clothes, which is kinda funny because I am doing a photoshoot nude right now and sure I don’t get paid as much, and the whole thing is pretty humilating, but I feel just as glamorous as she does. True story.

Posted in:Clothed|Doutzen Kroes

2009

09

Apr

Some Turkish Reporter in Black Face for Obama of the Day

I want to go to Turkey. Shit’s fucking crazy. They treat their news like some kind of comedy hour and have one of their reporters rockin’ blackface while reporting on Obama’s trip to their country.

It made me laugh and watch the whole thing and I don’t even speak the fucking language, so I think they are onto something, someone needs to get Anderson Cooper up on this shit to lock in the viewers because until I see him in blackface, I’m gonna be forced to think he’s just some uptight closet case who takes his job too seriously.

In fact, Turkey should be a lesson to us all. We should all leave the house in black face, you know and hit up the local KFC, or the pharmacy, just throw people off and when ppl ask you what you’re doing, bust into slave songs.

Posted in:Black Face|Obama|Turkey

2009

09

Apr

South Park Makes Fun of Kanye West of the Day

I haven’t seen South Park in years but I watched this clip and it’s fucking obscure as hell, the joke is so fucking out there and stupid that I laughed. It is also hating on Kanye and how ridiculous he is so you’ll probably like it. My computer is running like shit and so is my brain so I gotta get me some motherfuckin’ food. I’ll be back.

Here’s the full episode….

Posted in:Gay|Kanye West|South Park

2009

09

Apr

Lady Gaga Takes Her Tranny Lovin’ Ass Out Without Pants of the Day

Everyone knows Lady Gaga is ugly, including Lady Gaga. I feel like I wrote shit about her the last couple of days saying that the only reason she is popular is because she targets the gays and women and gays and women seem to be the only people who like ugly chicks because it makes them feel better looking, so in the event that I did, realize that I’ve been drunk for the last 4 days and everything is a bit of a blur.

I think I figured out why this pig doesn’t wear pants and it is because she is fat and like my wife, who is also fat, any non elastic waist band piece of clothing is the fuckin’ enemy, because they don’t make non elastic band waist clothing in her size, and that means having to come to terms with the fact that you’re a fuckin’ pig.

But I could be wrong and bitch is just trying to divert attention from her face, she’s like “LOOOK AT MY PUSSY, LOOK AT MY PUSSY, FORGET MY FACE….LOOK AT MY PUSSY”. Tranny loving whore.

Here are some pictures of her performing, every concert looks exactly the fucking same and shit bores me…but you may like it…if you’re black….cuz this ass is fat….

Posted in:Ass|Lady Gaga|Pantsless