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Jenna Ortega for the Beetlejuice Photocall of the Day
Jenna Ortega for the Beetlejuice Photocall of the Day
Kelly Brook From Big Titty Model to Big Back Model of the Day
Kelly Brook From Big Titty Model to Big Back Model of the Day
Charli XCX for Demon Kim Kardashian’s Brand of the Day
Charli XCX for Demon Kim Kardashian’s Brand of the Day
Christina Aguilera and her Botox Face and Ozempic Body Get Slutty of the Day
Christina Aguilera and her Botox Face and Ozempic Body Get Slutty of the Day
Shannon Mcmullen is the Instagram Of The Day
Shannon Mcmullen is the Instagram Of The Day

2008

11

Aug

Britney Spears Has a See Through Shirt On With a Bra of the Day

6 Comments »

I was convinced that something was in the air on Saturday night that made everyone fucking crazy. I am not sure what it was, but maybe I was wasted and having some kind of psychological / paranoid episode where I just thought everyone around me was acting weird, like the time I did mushrooms and ended up trying to take a nap in the middle of a highway before my friend with me saved my life about 30 seconds before I would have got run the fuck over, or the time I did bad E and it put kicked me in the ass and made me sit in the corner of the all nice dance party I was at, scared of everyone who came by because they had skeleton faces and I thought they were trying to rape my soul. I figured it was a full moon or something, but turned out that it wasn’t and when I was out, I saw a bouncer get smashed in the head with a beer bottle by a kid who weighed about 140 pounds and who was quickly taken outside and beaten the fuck up, I saw kids on the street kicking the fuck out of BMW X5 and trying to throw punches at the driver before the driver threw his drink all over them, pulled a U-turn and ran over their feet, I saw the dude I invited home with me in his underwear because he had lost his pants before realizing that I didn’t want a dude in his underwear to be the only motherfucker at my hot tub party and a dude I know had a gun pulled on him because he went home with some guy’s girlfriend and the guy found out, but by far the strangest event that went down on Saturday was that Britney Spears put on a bra under her see through shirt so that no one could see her dumpy, aimin’ to the ground, mom nipples….

Posted in:Bra|Britney Spears|See Through

2008

11

Aug

Kate Bosworth Bikini Pictures of the Day

9 Comments »

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

Kate Bosworth is pretty skinny for an American and should be given more credit for it, instead of abuse for being an anorexic. This is the kind of thinspiration all you fat fucks need so that you stop eating. Now, I don’t find her all that hot to look at and I never did because she pretty much has no sex appeal, but it’s nicer to look at than the shit I’ve seen sitting by the pool on my trips to the USA.

Now, I don’t travel all that much, or ever for that matter but I got a call on Sunday morning from this 18 year old girl who doesn’t have her driver’s license and who wanted to go to Vermont for the afternoon to shop and she needed a driver. Now, I don’t know why she called me to take her because I barely know her and I could have raped and killed her for all she knew, but since I had nothing better to do, I decided to go for the road trip. I showed up at her house, only to find that I’d be driving her dad’s BMW across the border and got nervous knowing that I am a Mexican with a sketchy past, that I was driving an expensive car despite being unemployed, that I was with an 18 year old girl who was 20 years younger than me and most importantly that I was only driving into Burlington for about 3 hours before turning around and coming back, but went anyway, because we all need adventure in our lives….

For the first hour, I kept telling the girl my concern about the border and that Americans will not like this whole situation and she kept telling me to tell the Border dude we were going to a confirmation or wedding and when I got to the border I felt like I was going to get arrested, I hate authority and I hate being in these situations and I panicked. I pulled up to the wicket window and these tough guy who though he was in the Iraq war and liked his power position and used it to intimidate my already nervous self asked me why I was going to the USA. I told him that I had dinner plans and instead of ending it there, decided to add “with friends” to make it more believable despite the smart side of my brain telling me not to. Now, the terminator found driving to the States to have dinner with friends a little strange, especially coming from a Mexican with an 18 year old in a BMW and as I was beating myself up for saying that I was meeting friends, he decided to ask me what my friend’s names were. I froze. I didn’t have an answer and I just stared at him blankly, while he got more and more aggressive, and started asking me about my job, why the car had damage on it, how much I make a month and then he got out and searched the fuckin’ car, asked me to pull over and brought me inside to search me. They asked me what my site was, there was no way in hell I was telling them that it was DrunkenStepfather because I feel like some of the shit I do on here is illegal and ended up spending 2 hours at the border before they agreed to let me in after jumpin through all the hoops and leading them to believe that I am not a drug dealer or terrorist, which I am not.

I guess the point of this story is really that there is no point, but once in Burlington, I walked into a store that was selling 12 packs of M&Ms for $2 and all kinds of other disgusting junk food that would make my wife cum more than I ever have, which in all honesty isn’t that hard because I was never one for worrying about making my woman cum and more into making myself cum. I also saw some fat bitches who made my wife look skinny sitting by an above ground pool at some trailer park campground and I felt like I was in heaven, a miserable heaven but heaven nonetheless.

Either way, here’s Bosworth in her bikini….

UPDATE – I forgot to mention that there was chicken breast, a bottle of wine and a box of sex toys in the car to make the whole border experience even more awkward than me hearing myself tell the border guard that I was meeting up with friends like an idiot. Not that you care, but since this is a blog I want to make sure I keep my diary in order so that when I look back on it in 20 years, to remind myself why I should never be a criminal, I’ll have all my facts in order….

Posted in:Bikini|Kate Bosworth

2008

11

Aug

Britney Spears is in a Brown Bikini of the Day

13 Comments »

Britney Spears wears her brown bikini to erase her potential shit stains from not wiping her ass properly which is the same reason why my wife used to wear red underwear for the week of her period back before she gave up on life and would take the time to use tampons instead of what she does now that pretty much makes anywhere she sits or lays down look like a murder scene. I guess this is Britney’s way of telling the world that she hasn’t fully given up yet and there’s still more of her to give us.

The whole thing reminds me of opening my fridge yesterday out of dire hunger and finding absolutely nothing to eat, because my wife beat me to it, but opened the vegetable crisper out of desperation, only to find 2 rotten cucumbers that had probably been there for 6 months, not quite long enough to be dried up and easy to clean. After gagging at the fuckin’ smell that was worse than any rank pussy I’ve met, I figured if I don’t clean it no one will and leaving it there for another 6 months wasn’t condusive to getting my life together. Now I am not the best cleaner or most coordinated person out there so as I tried dumping it into an old grocery bag, I missed and shit exploed all over the floor, polluting the air with rotten cucumber smell and a brown gel like substance that was once nutritious eats. As I scrubbed the floor like the bitch that I am, all I could think about was that this was probably exatly what Britney’s underwear looks like when it isn’t all brown, strategically selected by her stylist to help clean up her dirty little image.

Posted in:Britney Spears|Brown Bikini

2008

11

Aug

Shauna Sand Drops Her Skirt and Strips in Public of the Day

10 Comments »

I don’t know what Shauna Sand was up to this weekend, but I do know she had some kind of flashback to her days workin’ the pole and took off clothing in public before getting into the car. I can only assume that whoever the fuck homeboy who is driving her around is, was expecting a good time on the ride home and she was just prepping, or maybe dude wanted her dirty panties rubbin’ up against his seat so that whenever he needed something to jerk off to, he could always just sniff the fuckin’ seat and smell her putrid cunt, but the point is that I wish more girls had this kind of attitude. The only time I can convince a girl to take off clothes for me is when we are at the stripclub and she’s doing it anyway, but I do a running commentary in my head that makes me feel like I am directing the whole thing and delusionally more involved than I am actually am. It’s that kind of fantasy that helps me keep livin’ and despite Shauna Sand being disgusting, she’s still better lookin’ than most hookers I come across….which isn’t saying much, because the hookers I know have rotting faces and tit jobs that make Shauna Sand’s botched job look like a work of art, but it is still saying something….

Posted in:Shauna Sand|Strips

2008

11

Aug

Abbie Cornish in a Bikini of the Day

10 Comments »

Her name is Abbie Cornish and she’s some slut actress from Australia who managed to be in some movie called Stop-Loss starring Ryan Phillippe and while in that movie used her vagina to seduce this broken down divorcee who was in desperate need for a replacement for his ugly wife and fell for her. Maybe it was love at first sight, but I like to believe it was social climbing, because I don’t believe in love and noticed on her IMDB page that her latest move role is a love story that she is a main character in and the man she’s in love with is played by Ryan Phillippe. Maybe it’s a coincidence, but I don’t really believe in that shit, so I am goin’ with slut with an agenda that I am fallin’ into by posting this photo op because I am as easy to seduce as a desperate, lonely divorcee and all you really have to do is send me pictures of you in a bikini and you don’t actually have to have sex with me, because I wouldn’t really want to put anyone through that kind of abuse, no matter how much I hate you or how much I like fucking.

UPDATE – I was emailed that Abbie Cornish is the reason Ryan Phillippe and Reese Witherspoon got the divorce and she wasn’t preying on a man going through a divorce, but a man with a wife and kids, by showing him her vagina that hasn’t made 3 kids. Homewreckin’ is just as easy as seducing a desperate lonely man going through a divorce, so despite having the facts wrong, the point of the post is the same, and that point is that this Lohan lookin’ slut is nothing but a slut.

Posted in:Abbie Cornish|Bikini|Ryan Phillippe|Uncategorized

2008

11

Aug

Boost Mobile Party Brings Summer Altice and Natasha Henstridge Out in Their Bikinis of the Day

8 Comments »

Boost Mobile threw some kind of party this weekend and it lured all kinds of D-Listers and Hasbeens who put on their bikinis for the everyday person to feel like they are partying with people more important than they are, all while promoting Boost Mobile.

It reminds me of the DrunkenStepfather Hot Tub party I tried to organize when wasted Saturday night. I was doing my best recruiting young girls to come back to my place to get in their underwear, do drugs and rock out, but the only person I was able to convince to come to the party was some guy who was walking around in his underwear because he was so drunk that he lost his pants somewhere along the way that night, but I guess that probably worked out for the better, because it would have not only been embarrassing having everyone come back to my shit hole apartment to realize that the closest thing I have to a hot tub is some dirty bath tub no one uses that looks like a septic tank and that needs to be filled manually by water we boil on the stove….not to mention the only massage jets we’d get going would be me manning a straw and I just don’t have the lung capacity to fool even the drunkest girl into thinkin’ shit was a hot tub…..especially with my fat wife raining on my fucking parade by kickin’ everyone out. So I just left the pantless man and made my way home alone…..

Here are a couple of the no name useless sluts at the Boost Mobile party, because I like bikinis.

Natasha Henstridge….

Summer Altice….

Posted in:Boost Mobie|Natasha Henstridge|Summer Altice

2008

11

Aug

RIP Motherfucker the Isaac Hayes Edition of the Day

8 Comments »

Soul Legend, Grammy and Academy Award Winner, Shaft and Chef from South Park was found dead next to a running treadmill yesterday at around 1 pm. This provides further evidence to any of the haters who I argue with daily when they try to tell me that I need to exercise and that it is good for me and that maybe they should tell Hayes’ family and friends their theory on fitness, while I stick to being 300 pounds knowing that exercising will kill me, as I get fatter and fatter leading to diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease and pre-mature death.

I guess I can blame you South Park fans, if there are any of you still out there, who wished death upon Isaac Hayes for leaving the show after they made fun of Scientology so just know that you made this happen and that you are a muderer so next time you say “I hope he dies” or “I wish he was dead” realize the power that entails and use it towards good and by good I mean against the cast of The Hills.

RIP Motherfucker. Now let’s start this motherfuckin’ day….

Posted in:Isaac Hayes|RIP Motherfucker

2008

09

Aug

RIP Motherfucker The Bernie Mac Edition of the Day

35 Comments »

Comedian Bernie Mac died at 50 and I didn’t kill him, but Pneumonia (AIDS) did. I think 50 is too young to die but the good news is that he has worked his way out of the gutter and created a pretty mainstream career that made him a lot of money and that got his work out there.

He started in the ’70s. He’s made his impact. He is respected and loved in the community and an inspiration to poor black kids from the projects everywhere and he will be remembered by his many fans and followers and that’s more than we can say for any of us when we die….because no one cares about us.

Now I don’t know anything about Bernie Mac, but in 2007 he made this joke…..

“I’m going to still do my producing, my films, but I want to enjoy my life a little bit,” …

So, I guess he does dark comedy. The truth is that death sucks, so RIP Motherfucker.

Here are the Top 3 Bernie Mac Comedic Moments in History that I could Find in 3 Minutes

Bernie Mac on Def Jam Comedy

Bernie Mac on Def Jam Comedy Again

Bernie Mac in House Party 3 with Kid and PlayEven though this could all be a publicity stunt for Cedric the Entertainer (who is fat enough to be the first King of Comedy to Die) and Steve Harvey, but if it is true, then my heart goes out to his family.

Now his kid, who is 30 won’t have a dad anymore and will now really fit in nicely with her friends from her old neighborhood who have never had a dad, but jokes aside, shit still sucks.

Posted in:Bernie Mac|RIP Motherfucker

2008

09

Aug

stepLINKS of the Day

7 Comments »

< I am not dead yet, I just feel like I am. I am sure if I keep the site I will be because when I read comments like this I feel like that person will shoot me one day....

I have been meaning to ask you this question for some time and I was way too lazy to ask. I am so glad that some other losers got to you and now I have your answer. If it helps I was writing 5 years ago and I still never made it big and when I discovered your website I thought I found a soul mate but then I posted about my love of jail bait girls on your forum and got banned so now I am reduced to messaging you on the comments which is ironcic because you claim to be angry about how nobody reads your site but you ignore all the comments you have gotten from me over the years but what do I care my internet g/f broke up with me a few months ago so now all I have this ….

I am not sure what that is all about but I am mad that I am not drunk….but dizzy from disease….here are my links….let’s fuck you little whore….


Phobe Price Kissed a Dog and She Liked It Video
GO

A Webcam Is My Best Friend When It I am Bored and Girls Are Willing To Get Naked On Them….
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Shauna Sand Almost Died in a Car Crash. The Tragedy is that She Didn’t
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Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza is Pretty Much Naked
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Penelope Cruz Nipslip Throwback
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Petrea Nemcova’s Hair Will Look Better On Your Balls….
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Some Rollerbalde Towing Jump That Makes Me Happy
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The 10 Hottest Legal High School Chicks
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The 10 Hottest Topless Cigarette Smoking Scenes…
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Lohan Pullin’ Titty Tricks Like the Crafty Lesbian That She IS
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Pornstar or Popstar?
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Journey to the Centre of the Earth….To See Journey
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This Dog’s Got More Game Than This Baby…..Because Dog’s are Man’s Best Friend and Babies are Man’s Worst Enemy….
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A Whole Lot of Porn Sites Reviewed So You Don’t Get Ripped Off While Gettng Off
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Marija Vujovic is the Type of Women You Will Never Bang
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Clay Gayken Had a Baby?
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Lydia Herst in Lingerie For Dudes Who Like Rich Girls in Panties….
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The Best Video Dating Tape Ever According To The Asshole Who Emailed This Link Into Me…
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Smart Car Versus Lamborgini
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Ghetto Mom Fights in the Streets As Kid Watches
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Find Girls to Fuck – We All Know You Are a Virgin
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Shay Laren Strips Down – Video
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Now THIS Is a Future Porn Star Masturbation the way You Like Watching Her Masturbate…….
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I Don’t Know WHo Leyla Melani is, But I Want Her to Wrap Her Legs Around My Fat Body
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L’Oreal Lightened Beyonce’s Skin for an Ad Because They Are Racist and Hate Black People
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Miranda Kerr is the Kind of Innocent Girl You Want to Turn Bad
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Pervert Caught in the Act
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Puma Suede is Your Video Fantasy of the Day Because You are Into Very Sick Bitches….
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Heather Graham Throwback. What Ever Happened to Her?
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This Blog About Madonna is Most Probably Fake, But The Stories Are Humiliating, So Who Cares?
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More From the Retarded Policeman
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Fuck Women Are Retarded Sometimes
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Paul Newman Is Pretty Much Dead
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Use This to Get Sex, BEcause Friday is the Best Day of the Week to Get Laid
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Amateur Sluts Naked Who You May Know…
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Melissa Midwest Gallery
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James Inman Got Knocked the Fuck Out
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Nadine Velazquez is Full Bangable
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Emma Watson Bikini Party
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The Dude WHo Murdered a Bitch at Lil Kims Party Confesses
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A Little Something Extra
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Dollar Bill Trick Which is Pretty Rad
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United States Military To Be 30% Robotic By 2020
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Megan Fox – The Making of the Saint
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Make a Detonator Off of a Cell Phone
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Four Naked Women Who are Not My WIfe and One WHo Is……well not my wife but some Photographer’s wife…They’re naked so be happy…
GO

Do it Yourself Vasectomy for Those Of You Who Do Not Want to Get Themselves Pregnant While Jerking Off….
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Vegas Chick in Her Underwear and Stupid Clown Socks
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS:

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

08

Aug

Jessica Simpson Performs in Some Shorts of the Day

13 Comments »

[ Images removed in compliance with DMCA Notice ]

Jessica Simpson is wearing shorts to really try to live out this whole country thing, because the only country about her was that she was born to a rich family in Texas who packed their bags to have an even richer family in California and the only thing this bitch knows about backwoods is that it’s what her dad calls anal sex and the closest thing she’s ever been to backwoods was her role in Dukes of Hazard, kinda offending the actual backwoods folk who listen to her shit as it pollutes their contry airwaves and coutry music festivals she shows up to in these offensive costumes, like the time I went to a Caribbean festival dressed like Blackface, that’s I lie, I was actually wearing a KKK cape in the car because my friend bet me that I wouldn’t do it, and he was right because that’s the kind of shit that gets you shot, but I did go to a Jewish Temple once with the Jew Cap on as a joke that wasn’t really funny and turned out to be really fuckin’ boring….but yeah, Jessica Simpson is doin some hollywood shit, not relating to the market she’s trying to seduce and is pretty much pissing everyone the fuck off and the whole time she’s doing it, I would love to be fucking her…..

PS – I have a fever so if what I write makes no sense, it’s cuz I am dying, ya fuckin’ Pervert.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Performance|Shorts