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Archive for the SFW Category

2016

Feb

Emma Stone’s Booty of the Day

Emma Stone is a weird mouthed celebrity….you know another one of these huge stars on the Kristen Stewart, Emma Watson, Jennifer Lawrence kick that make zero sense to me…not even when I stare at her ass in leggings, because I know that leggings lie, but more imporantly, because I know she’s just overrated, has a huge nerd fanbase, who is relentlessly loyal to her, despite her weird mouth,

Makes no sense to me..But bitch gets paid…more than her Soccer Mom Audi Q5 is letting on…bitch gets paid…more than you’d expect her to get paid based on her weird mouth alone…

It’s just the way the world works, there are these girls who are just loved and eaten up by hollywood for no real reason at all…other than that producers can get higher budgets for movies and thus line their pockets with more money…

Posted in:Emma Stone|SFW

2016

Feb

Famewhoring Paris Hilton does a Bathing Suit of the Day

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Paris Hilton in a one piece bathing suit, acting like the typical Paris Hilton baby talking spoiled brat, you know the original GIGI HADID crossbred with Kim Kardashian, in what would be more appropriate if it was Paris Hilton not doing this pink princess garbage she’s played out, but rather porno shit she revlolutionized for rich kids everywhere to find their place in the world, mainly Kim K who won at Paris Hilton’s game, thanks to the popularity of Hip Hop…

Either way, Paris Hilton lives, I wouldn’t know since she blocks me on everything, but she lives….she’s irrelevant, a cockroach, a cum and bloody shit stain on a pair of expensive panties of a person, but she lives…

Posted in:Paris Hilton|SFW

2016

Feb

Bootleg NYFW Round-Up of the Day

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I assume that New York Fashion weeks is over, it’s been a week, and that’s usually what a week means, right…

Well here’s my highlight reel that doesn’t involve any real highlights or a reel, or any see through or nipples on the runway for fashion…..which was something I was really into back in the day, pre-porn, when there was a equally fashion show on the one channel I got without cable, where nipple’s would be everywhere, and along with jerking off to it, I realized, “shit fashion is clever, they have it all figured out, nipples on daytime TV, because it’s fashion, even though it’s still nipples and I can jerk off to it’…

This is actually a really shitty fucking round up…filled with irrlevant, old, bootleg people…but whatever – at least they are trying..

AnnaSophia Robb’s See through to Bra

Em Rat Cow Trying Hard in a Weird Bodysuit

Naya Rivera’s Bad Botox Face

Some Claire Danes Legs…

Kirsten Dunsty

Blake Lively’s Tits of the Day Riding Deadpool’s Success – Cuz She has a Kid With Him…

“I did not wake up like this. ????”

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS
CLICK HERE

Posted in:NYFW|SFW

2016

Feb

Charli XCX Butt SHot of the Day

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I’ve seen Charli XCX perform, it was accidental uneventful, I don’t even remember where it was or why I saw it and she wasn’t very impressive at all, not even her tits could save the hack of a performer she was…but the good news for her and I guess for us is that no one actually cares about music or art or any of that “substance” stuff that people used to be celebrated for, you know “talent”…what people care about is a girl being as slutty as possible, as naked or slutty dressed as possible attending all the relevant events like she matters – so the paparazzi take pics of her…so tits can save…and this is the proof…even though I’m more into looking at her fat ass..because showing tits is so obvious when her whole campaign is based around tits.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Charli XCX|SFW

2016

Feb

Megan Fox on TV of the Day

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Megan Fox talks about her cross dressing child, she talks about how her kids telling her when she was in her womb that they are bohemian revolutionaries and a whole lot of other broken girl botox filled shit…

These actors who start out in this shit young, who are thrown into this vapid world and her are abducted and procreating with David from 90210 are so distorted and fucked up that they need to dig into the world from their self absorbed, ignorant, uneducated place to find purpose..

“I must be more than tits dudes wanted to fuck in a series of shitting fucking movies”…”I must be more than a talentless idiot with millions of dollars”…and with all that free time on her hands – she’s figured it all out…garbage…

Posted in:Megan Fox|SFW

2016

Feb

Lorde in a Bikini of the Day

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The funny thing about Lorde in a a bikini is that I’m actually not disgusted, thrown off, in the mood to body shame her…or laugh..

She’s some singer songwriter from New Zealand who at 17 pretty much did the Taylor Swift all thanks to the internet…A viral video sensation – who made it in music….all while being not very cute..

So to see a barely legal girl, like Lorde, who wasn’t hot make it because of good content that people liked, was almost refreshing in this instagram model, rich kid celebrity world…even if it was a one hit wonder – or a novelty – or just overly relatable singing about never being famous and getting famous for it..what I am saying is that I’ve never wanted to see Lorde in a bikini, but at the same time, I want to see everyone in a bikini.

That said, if you’ve ever seen Lorde and if you ever watched her video Royals, or any of the marketing around that album, you’d already know she has absolutely zero sex appeal – there is zero hot to her….or about her…it’s part of her image..

So seeing her in a bikini…something I love…looking like a girl in a bikini…at 19…is actually almost refreshing….It’s like she’s a girl and not just some weirdly marketed “dark” one hit wonder from New Zealand…sure she’s not my dream body to jerk off to, but she’s got a flat stomach – big hips – a waist – thick thighs – little tits..and it could be a lot worse…she could be Adele..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lorde|SFW

2016

Feb

Erin Heatherton’s Asshole Upskirt in Miami of the Day

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Erin Heatherton is one of the models that Leonardo DiCaprio hired to play girlfriend when she was first launching her modeling career, before getting fat and being downgraded to Sports Illustrated, which happens to be where Lenardo DiCaprio is hiring his new girlfriend’s from, because like Hugh Hefner, the gutter girls are more fun than the uppity fashion girls..

The reason I know they weren’t or aren’t actually fucking Leonardo DiCaprio, and/or that they are hookers who gold dig to fuck the famous, is because they are all BFFs and any girl I know would eat the fucking fetus of any girl who fucks a man they dated, even fucked, it’s just too close for comfort….

Well, she’s making moves by showing the world her fat legs and her asshole at some Sports Illustrated Miami swim event – because these motherfuckers are milking the fuck out of their magazine release with a 10 days of bullshit appearances, like the friend you hate who drags out their birthday into a month long ordeal…it’s like shut the fuck up SI and go take pics of girls in their bikinis, while those same girls on their quest of fame and fortune or at least fame and fortune cock….show the world their assholes…

If you’re not into her asshole – and everyone should be because they are the gateway to a woman’s soul – and the only kind of sext I want – like Leo – He’s more about his asshole – here’s an emotional post by her directed at the sports illustrated editor – like some suck up weirdo

“The lady that made my life fun again.. MJ, you are everything to me @MJ_Day”

Intense…I guess this is what happens when a model fired by Victoria’s Secret goes through a depression – and needs SI to pull her out of the model dumps….I just wonder what the real reason for her being fired…I blame herpes…AIDS…or Leonardo but we’ll just go with “she didn’t sell enough for them because these girls are just sexy avon ladies”….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS FROM CLICK HERE

Posted in:Erin Heatherton|SFW

2016

Feb

Irina Shayk and Steffy Argelich for Vogue Paris of the Day

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Prostitute to the stars, Irina Shayk, may be a soulless Russian, but that’s OK because no Russian women have souls. They are just trained to like the best things life has to offer and they are trained how to get those things using their amazing faces and bodies that we can assume Communist rule has something to do with…because there are so many fucking hot Russians in both mainstream and sex work, that something had to happen, like extermination or “genocide”…to make this happen.

You have to remember that Russia is still a place where people are getting poisoned for doing things that humiliate Russia, whether you’re the head of the Track and Field team, or the ex spy a UK Judget said PUTIN probably poisoned…this is now that the country opened up, and not behind the iron curtain with internet access..we can assume that they are a crazy fucking people…back before they could get caught.

Either way, that doesn’t mean Irina and her topless friend aren’t lovely, if anything it makes me like them more – knowing they are out to kill whatever gets in the way of her “dreams”….and/or retirement plan….and/or Brad Cooper…she’s worked too hard to make this happen.

I mean – this is Vogue Paris, and yes they’ve devalued by using Kardashians and other fame whores to promote their magazine, but they are still Vogue Paris…that’s big for what could have been a Russian sex worker…

Posted in:Irina Shayk|SFW

2016

Feb

Bella Throne’s Bikini in Mexico Vacation of the Day

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Some dude was really upset that I call Bella Thorne 40, because she looks fucking 40, and my brand of comedy is to repeat myself until it is awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved.

I call her a 40 year old pretending to be a recently turned 18 year old, because it is good marketing….dude’s love that tween shit, even if the girl playing an 18 year old is in her 40s….

It’s called “TEEN PORN”…none of those girls are 18, but they look more 18 than Bella Thorne.

I just think it’d be a great story line…for a really terrible movie….that I write about everyday – so when it happens you know I was robbed…

About a Stage Mom with Hipster Kids who Don’t Want anything to do with Mainstream stars, Decides to go to an Audition she finally set up at Disney type company, where she pretends to be her 18 year old kid, gets the part and is forced to build her celebrity as an 18 year old and not get caught…doing the Bella Thorne self loving, self promotion, self promotion, narcissist….instagram slutty bullshit…

No 18 year old needs to be at the gym as much as this one – she’s 40.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS

Posted in:Bella Thorne|SFW

2016

Feb

Hayden Panettiere’s Thick Thighs on Set of the Day

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Based on her thighs alone, it looks like Hayden Panettiere is doing an ad for a Fast Food Chain….like she really loves that shit enough to endorse it for a lifetime supply of that shit…

OH. She’s not just getting fat, post pregnancy does that to a woman, especially when they get institutionalized to deal with their post baby depression, and probably deeper rooted issues of being the child of some trashy hooker looking Soap Opera star, probably jacked up on so many fucking anti-depressants…

BUT. She’s actually on set of a Fast Food restaurant commercial.

Look at that keen glimmer in her eyes….she must be staring at the table filled with burgers to feed those midget thighs….