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Sara Sampaio Shows Off her Pussy in Tight Pants Under the Guise that it is a Fitness Video of the Day

Industry Flesh Puppet Jessica Alba Propagandizes for the Machine of the Day

Sydney Sweeney is Glamour’s Woman of the Year of the Day

Paige Spiranac Feeling Herself Up of the Day

Margaret Qualley is Hot for an Ugly Chick of the Day

2009

Dec

Tamara Mellon in Her Bikini of the Day

7 Comments »

Here’s multimillionaire named Tamara Mellon. She’s a shoe icon known as the brain behind Jimmy Choo, which is one of the big shoe designers to the stars, and if you’re wondering why I know this shit, it’s from hanging out in the mall shoe stores listening to bitches talk as they try on their pumps, barefoot and sometimes in short skirt forcing me to hit up the thrift store or Salvation Army for some cheap pumps to jerk off all over cuz the urges are just too much to handle.

Either way, she runs the shit like she was a Jewish dude, but instead of her bitching out her staff and firing people for not showing up on time or whatever cunts in business trying to pretend they have dicks in business by overcompensating, she’s on the beach showing off her scabby tit, that I am guess is from an implant, but could be from having an overall sloppy body from spending too much time behind her desk making millions, and not enough time doin’ squats….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Jimmy Choo|Tamara Mellon|Tamara Mellon. Jimmy Choo

2009

Dec

Lindsay Lohan Still Topless for Muse of the Day

4 Comments »

Lohan is really getting a lot of airplay for this photoshoot. I haven’t seen so much Lohan coverage since she flashed her pussy years ago. It’s like every week this bullshit hipster fake art magazine releases another shot of her tits and all the virgin blogs go nuts for the shit, even though Lohan’s been done for a long fucking time and even if she released niche fetish videos like fucking used tampons or getting her ear cummed in or whatever the hot new porn trends are, I would have bet most people wouldn’t care. I guess I was wrong and there’s still more Lohan to be had, unless of course she dies of cardiac arrest or other “natural causes” before that time comes….and it doesn’t really matter because she has great tits…that I would want to use like I was Muse to get noticed…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|muse|Topless

2009

Dec

Tila Tequila Bottom Feeding of the Day

9 Comments »

So I go from an actress who kept to herself, who was relatively low key, especially the last few years who despite a bad choice in husbands, really didn’t bother me at all. She was in good movies, she was a good actress, she was cute and fun to see in movies, who passed away before her time, a tragedy, whether it was suicide, drug addiction, mixing prescriptions or her diabetes….to this piece of fucking garbage Tila Tequila bottom feeding whore, who is loud to get noticed, who pretends to be a dyke to get noticed and who sluts it up to get noticed. She is trash and low grade meat and even her staged scenes to get noticed lack any fucking edge, substance or creativity. She is someone who I’m sure everyone can agree would be better off dead, or at least our society would be better off with her dead because she is the fucking devil, I just don’t understand how she hasn’t killed herself yet, or how she can be so delusional to think she’s got value on this earth…

Now she’s gone a recruited some heiress to the Johnson and Johnson fortune named Casey Johnson who clearly is trying to piss off some family members and pave her own way like she was Paris Hilton and like all old money families there’s almost always one misguided whore to bring down the rest of them thanks to not having to work….even though I can only imagine hanging with Tila Tequila would feel like a job, a real horrible fucking job, worse than shoveling horse shit, or anything that Dirty Jobs show has been on and I”m just talking about her pussy…something she wouldn’t have been keeping in panties when on her quest for fame if she was really serious about getting noticed…I can always tell how committed a bitch is to a cause based on how much pussy lip she shows….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Attention Whore|Tila Tequila

2009

Dec

Pam Anderson is a One-Trick Pony of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t hate Pam Anderson. I write mean spirited shit about her because I think it’s time to hang up her silicone tits and age gracefully. I find her holding onto her sex appeal and career based on her tits depressing at best…it’s actually pretty fucking pathetic….and the fact that people are asking her to sign her fucking Baywatch picture from 15 years ago just proves that it is time for her to move the fuck on. She’s a one-trick pony and will always and forever be the bitch from Baywatch and there’s really no fuckin’ point for her to even try, even though all she fuckin’ does is try, I mean when she’s not sucking and fucking dirty hep dick.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Baywatch|Pam Anderson

2009

Dec

RIP Motherfucker The Brittany Murphy Edition of the Day

26 Comments »

Just last night my friend asked me who would I rather fuck Brittany Murphy or Alicia Silversone…I said Brittany Murphy hands down maybe he was some visionary who predicts deaths, or maybe he’s just a virgin loser who asks me those questions every time I see him….

I can only assume at 32 she died of a drug overdose…but it her defense, I’d turn to drugs if I let Ashton Kutcher inside me too….so I guess that means it is all his fault…

Actors are fucked up, they do too many drugs and have too much money and too little to do especially when not getting work, free time and money means getting fucked up….

She was only 32…..what a fucking waste but at least her legacy will live on in such classics as happy feet and the voice on King of the Hill amongst other good movies peppered with real shit movies…

I am not sure if drugs are bad or if Hollywood is bad and the drugs are just really fucking good.

Either way, she won’t be coming to my birthday party this year and I guess no one will be going to hers either. Good job throwing your life away you self-destructive twat who didn’t realize what you had….

I’m gonna go masturbate to Brittany Murphy in 8 Mile, I know all you whiners think its wrong cuz she just died, but I figure it’s better to do it now while she’s still warm than later when she’s cremated….Wow..that was even low for me..

Seriously though, it is sad news, it is fucked up, but people die all the time, especially when they are drug addicts….she should have got help. RIP Motherfucker….

Update -I find myself coping with this loss by going through all the same steps we all go through……I am so cliche….

Step 1 Denial – She didn’t die, it must be a joke or staged cuz she is tired of being in the limelight oh right she’s not in the limelight….

step 2 Anger – Bitch, she had everything going for her, so many people would have traded lives with her why would do this to us……

step 3 Bargaining -Why God? Why would you take her….Bring her back to life or something…I swear I’ll quit drinking….

step 4 Depression – A life without Brittany Murphy is a life not worth living. The day is grey and will remain grey the rest of our days without her. There’s no point to go on without her….

step 5 Acceptance – Oh well, I guess death is part of life and people die everyday, especially when they are drug addicts, not much we can do about it but go on with life. I have no sympathy for suicide. Now everyone let’s go on with our lives….

Posted in:Brittany Murphy|R.I.P.

2009

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

4 Comments »

I just saw a drunken 40 year old drive her car up onto the sidewalk so I decided to be a hero and save the fucking day. She was all dolled up coming home from her Christmas party and I guess she didn’t get to fuck her boss like she had planned cuz she was fuming, so I decided to offer to stuff her like a turkey, you know let her egg nog drip down my face, before fisting her with a candy cane and she wasn’t having it, so I took down her license plate, called the cops and reported her for drinking and driving. That’ll learn her to not buy into my sexual advance bribes and now lets hope bitch loses her fucking license…

The funniest thing about this time of year is that everyone young and old seems to be up late, getting hammered with friends and family or alone (like me) and it’s pretty out of control, but not as out of control as my stepLINKS, click EM.

Hot Damn Mila Kunis
GO

One of The Assholes From So You Think You Can Dance is Raping Kids or Some Shit
GO

Because You Are Flying Solo This weekend
GO

Get Ready to Puke in 3…2…1
GO

The Ultimate Colleciton Of Rihanna’s Hottest Pics
GO

Shadow Puppet Presidents
GO

Lady Gaga or Lady Caca
GO

Lookin Good Sweetheart
GO

Yeah I’d Bang Sarah Jessica Parker
GO

25 Ways to Wear Duct Tape
GO

Striptease of the Day
GO

Latoya Jackson is Either Santa Clause or a Keebler Elf. I Can’t Be 100% Sure
GO

Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
GO

Jesus, Lohan is Looking Beat
GO

Beyonce is Hawking Some Shit and Looking Good While Doing It
GO

You Know Snoop Dog and Martha Put Some of The Good Shit in Those Brownies
GO

Halle Berry is Looking Sad, But Hot
GO

Some Marilyn Monroe Paintball Art – VIDEO
GO

If Jerry Seinfeld
GO

And MORE of That Broad With the Super Nice Ass – VIDEO
GO

Naked Cheerleader is Masterbating
GO

A Porn Star and An Amateur and a Fucking Machine
GO

Lucy Pinder Celebrates X-Mas in Nuts
GO

Always Leave a Note – A Gallery
GO

I’m Really Developing a Thing for Rachel McAdams
GO

Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
GO

Vickie Blows is Topless and Wearing Stockings
GO

Check Out This Busty Teen
GO

Porn Stars, You Gotta Love Em
GO

Miranda Kerr is Smokin’
GO

Sammie and Angelina Get It On
GO

Girls Gone Wild: Nurse and Cop Girl-Girl Kissing
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Beautiful Brazilian Axe Angels [72 Photos]
GO

Abbey Brookes is Sexy
GO

Scarlett Johannson – Harper’s Bazaar Magazine
GO

Who Doesn’t Love a Backflip Fail?
GO

One of the Sluts From Glee is Topless on Broadway
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Politics in Ireland Seem Kind of Awesome
GO

This Ke$ha Chick Looks Worse Than Courtney Love
GO

IS IT JUST ME, OR ARE DENISE MILANI’S TITS GETTING EVEN BIGGER?
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

Dec

Tara Reid’s Serious Bottom Feeding of the Day

17 Comments »

I am surprised Tara Reid’s still alive, I just assumed she died decades ago, but instead she’s making an appearance showing off her botched fake tits we have all already seen during her fall from her peak, which really isn’t news, considering she’s really irrelevant and has been for at least 5 years and at her level of fame you’d expect her publicity stunt to involve sucking dick on camera or at least flashing some fucking cunt.

Playboy will ask me to take these down…cuz they love suing people like me….even though they send me emails every week asking me to promote their bullshit…that’s called a one-sided relationship, someone needs to teach them to share, if they did maybe they wouldn’t be going bankrupt…

I assume Lohan is next on their target list.

Posted in:Playboy|Tara Reid

2009

Dec

Sarah Michelle Gellar in her One Piece for a Movie of the Day

5 Comments »

It’s been a real big week for Sarah Michelle Gellar. First I wrote about how she’s pretty much fallen off the map and no one cares about her, except maybe some of her Buffy fans, because Buffy fans are usually pretty loyal, since they have little else going on, especially when it comes to pussy, even though it’s been decades since that shit was on the air, and now she’s in a movie wearing one-piece bathing suits and simulating sex and masturbating, I’m not really sure what the fuck is going on, but I definitely know this role is not comin’ in at the peak of her career, we’re into the sunset years..Good Bye Sarah Michelle Gellar, at least your fans will remember you with their multiple box sets of the Buffy Complete series, in the event one gets scratched, along with photocopies of every single picture this bitch was ever in before being in roles like this shit called Veronika Decides to Die cuz she’s gotta pay the bills….and I know still get you off….

Here’s the masturbating…

Here’s the boring Sex scene….

Posted in:One Piece|Sarah Michelle Gellar

2009

Dec

Ali Larter’s Ass in Denim of the Day

1 Comment »

I downloaded these pictures the other day and I wasn’t sure why. Maybe it’s because I like watching bitches shove dirty objects into slots after watching girls run for their fucking lives, especially when that dirty object being shoved into their slot is my dick…..

I don’t know who Ali Larter is, but I assume she’s been in movies, or on TV, because the paparazzi took pictures of her and despite the paparazzi usually being mexican immigrants who fuck Britney Spears, they know a hell more about this shit that I do.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ali Larter|Ass

2009

Dec

Latoya Jackson Buying Lingerie for the Weirdos of the Day

No Comments »

Latoya Jackson went Lingerie shopping and despite having spent some time a decade and a half ago watching her playboy videos, I never really thought she had it goin on and that was before she took off her human mask and let her Alien features shine, like she was her brother, I found the whole thing pretty unsettling….

Not to mention she was quoted saying that she was lingerie shopping because….

La Toya Jackson says she’s picking up gifts “for the children” from Frederick’s of Hollywood – a famous lingerie store!

Think of this as my Michael Jackson tribute, since the only living thing that looks enough like him to imagine him molesting you when you were a little boy and had dreams of having an amusment park and petting zoo and all the toy you ever wanted all to yourself, back in a time when you didn’t know playing “hide the microphone in your ass and don’t tell your mother because we’re friends and this is “our” secret” was wrong, but you did know it makes all your dreams come true…..

Here are the disturbing pictures….and I think her hat is from “the palace hotel” in Dubai, the same hotel I think her brother is living at dressed like an arab woman convered head to toe and ninja so no one notices him, but that’s all speculation…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Latoya Jackson|Lingerie