I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

04

Jul

I am – I am – Juliette Lewis is a Rabid Hipster Lesbian Performing of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Juliette Lewis playing with her band. She looks like some ravaged lesbian ready to bite off any cock that comes her way. I don’t understand what the fuck she’s doing but I can only assume it’s because of drugs.

I have been running this website for a long time and when I first started the internet was almost the wild west. I didn’t get in on it in the 90s like I should of because then maybe I’d have more than 10 readers, but I did get into it before all the mainstream corporations started buying everyone up.

The reason I got into the internet was because I knew going to Hollywood or NYC to launch some kind of career in Entertainment would never happen as a 35 year old, poor mexican. I would get doors slammed in my face because I don’t look the part, my shit’s too racy, my jokes aren’t obvious or that good. I knew that I could reach an audience of people this way. I didn’t want to be censored, I didn’t want to conform and I didn’t really have the money or way to make it happen and I wasn’t that talented to do it any other way. But I do have something to say and I can say it here without being controlled or told what to do and I am not doing it for the money, I am doing it because I have nothing better to do.

In the past few years, mainstream media realized that people were on the computer all day at work and not at home watching TV, they realized that all the eyeballs they had were disappearing because of the internet and they have been finding ways to take it over. Sites are being bought up everyday and eventually all the biggest sites online will be owned by big companies who also own your cable companies, TV channels, magazines, newspapers. It’s all about controlling information and advertising revenue.

It was bound to happen and people with deep pockets can still do what they want, they still have control over policy and it’s in the government’s best interest to shut down people who are saying shit they don’t want said and that’s when shit like DMCA acts come into effect making digital copies of copyright material illegal to post. That’s why I get hit up with emails from lawyers and Cease and Desist orders all the fucking time now, when I never did before. That’s why Perez Hilton is being sued hard and will probably end up losing the fight because the system is in place to work for the big guys and not people like us.

I am not an activist, but in 2 weeks a law is going into effect that puts an end to online radio.

I don’t listen to music often but I do appreciate the freedom someone in their basement has to start up something, play music and get heard, as a free service to us. Without that freedom of speech, we lose our freedom of listening to what we want to listen to and people will never get what they need to hear and we will all become blind drones who believe what the media is telling us paying monthly fees to access corporate controlled online radio.

We will never question wars because they will present the war to us in a way that makes sense and that makes us think is warranted. They will never let us know that the earth is dying from Global Warming and keep selling us SUVs that eat up more gas because gas is a limited resource and in ten years you’ll be paying 50 times what you are paying today and you’ll still pay it because you’ll believe you need it. We will never question whether AIDS was a virus created in labs in the 70s to shut up a loud group of fags who were protesting and causing massive headaches in all communities about gay rights.

I am not a hippie, I have never had a cause, I have never cared enough to protest but I appreciate that I can do what I do even if I am not making money doing it.

So if you don’t want the Internet to turn into bullshit, censored, controlled Television and if you want to save internet Radio so that you can listen to whatever you want to listen to, do your part and click this link SaveNetRadio. This law basically means that they will have to pay royalty fees that are retroactive and will essentially put all internet radio out of business.

If that doesn’t interest you, maybe Juliette Lewis performing does. Cuddles.

Posted in:Bra|Freak|Hipster|Juliette Lewis|Lesbian|Unsorted

2007

04

Jul

I am – Ashley Tisdale in a Bikini Again of the Day

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Here’s that little High School Musical dirtbag rockin’ another bikini and making a sand castle like she was 7. I think Disney probably puts shit in their craft services cart that keeps the staff young. I call it Peter Pan Never Never Land sauce because Walt Disney was into little kids. It takes more than a man with a dream to make a magical land, it takes a man who likes kids a little too much, but it was a different era then and it made him rich and since rich people are untouchable I guess that shit will never get out, but I will tell you this, Walt Disney molested my Grandmother, at least that the story she always told us. She was also insane and never left Mexico so it probably never happened but every time she’d see one of us with some knock off Disney toy she’d go on a fucking rampage and shake in the corner for an hour crying.

I lived in this small town and in the small down was some weird magical village some creep made himself and marketed as a local amusement park with clowns, a petting zoo, one of those bouncy castles, and a few half ass activities like one water slide, a playground and some other games and shit. I never went because I don’t do that shit. Either way, he had been running it since the 60′, the golden era for theme parks and they ended up shutting him down in the 90s for some dirty shit that I think people should be shot over.

Either way, looking at these pictures of a 22 year old who looks young teen is some legal shit, at least she’s not fat and I can handle lookin at her in a Bikini even if she thinks she’s 7. Happy 4th of July you American fucks.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ass|Bikini|Playing|Tits|Unsorted

2007

03

Jul

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I know that no one is reading this because it is 4th of July, but I am expecting at least one of my 7 readers to be a loser with no friends who has no plans tonight and has decided to have a romantic night alone with a jar of hair conditioner because you’re too shy to buy lube, some scented candles and your highschool yearbook.

If you’re not too busy being American and proud, feel free to click some of these links.


Eva Green’s got a hot Pussy and She Wears it as a Dress
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Nicole Richie is Pregnant and Getting Married. Take That DJ AM.
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Megan Fox Ruins a See Through Opportunity
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Sarah Michelle Gellar Takes Her Legs Out Shopping
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Some Ashlie Rhey Patriotic Moment for Independence Day
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Crazy Bitch Getting Really Excited at a Rave. It’s Called E.
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Danielle Lloyd Tweaks Her Nipples in a Bikini Top
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A NSFW Ice Cream Treat to celebrate the summer…
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Kim Kardashian Takes her Ass Out in Spandex
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Quentin Tarantino is a Fat Ass
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Hayden Panettiere Sings the National Anthem in Video Cuz She’s the Next Lohan
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Hilary Duff Gives the Paparazzi the Finger. She’s Not So Wholesome….
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Some Stupid Stunt Gone Wrong
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Paris Hilton Jail Butt Plug
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Paris Hilton’s Crotch Shot…Not that you haven’t seen it before….
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Kelly Clarkson is a Tub of Shit
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Some Slutty Chick Gets Caught Cheating on 2 Guys
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Lucy Pinder Naked in Some Magazine
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Natasha Bedingfield Wore No Panties for Diana Show
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Michelle Rodriguez Does Chin Ups at a Bar Because She’s a Dude
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Some Slut Named Aida Yespica in Matrix Magazine being a Slut
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Madame Heidi Fleiss – Pimp to the Stars is Opening a Laundromat
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Someone’s Uploading Nude Pictures to Photobucket
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Hot Slut Leann Tweeden in a Magazine Spread
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Scarlett Johansson’s Lookin Like a Warthog
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Some Slut Named Crissy Maran
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Some French Chick Shakes Her Booty Video – She Has Tattoos So Is 18 to Me
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My Favorite Dude Pete Doherty Is Going Back to Rehab or Jail
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Some More French Ass on Youtube
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Don’t Stay in this Hotel
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Some Chick Named Louise Redknapp Topless Bikini
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Chick Falls on Live TV
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The Paparazzi Show up for Lohan’s Birthday
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Grey’s Anatomy Chick is Fat
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Thank Got for Digital Cameras and Tits
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Vanessa Minnillo is Not a Mexican Hooker
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Serena WIlliams is a Big Winner
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Some Kid Calls 911 For Help With His Math
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Some French Model Does a Public Strip
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Strippers Showing their Asses and Titties to the Crowd
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Here’s a Cam Girl Video For You
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Crazy Girl Masturbating on a Flight…
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A Whole Lot of Girls Flashing
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Don’t Wear This to your 4th of July Parties Unless You Want Your Cousins Trying To Bang You
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

03

Jul

I am – Sophie Cahill Intentional Flash of the Day

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Sophie Cahill was Miss Wales a couple of years ago. I obviously never heard of her because I am really not that worldly and I don’t really follow the whole beauty pageant thing because I find the concept annoying. It turns out that this girl who is obviously out of the pageant industry is doing what any drunk girl who was forced into beauty pageants all her life would do and that’s get breast implants and hang out with party sluts who encourage her to flash her tits to the camera for publicity. As much as I don’t like beauty pageants, I do like drunk girls crying for attention and that’s why I am posting these.

I remember knowing this girl who was the Prom Queen in her highschool, she was also the valedictorian, captain of the cheerleading team, involved in student government, student sports teams and had a scholarship to some good college. I met her after she crashed from all the pressure she put on herself to be the best at everything she did and had dropped out of school, cut off her parents, took up drinking, stripping and turning minor tricks to pay the bills. It was like seeing the girl who had everything going for her give all that opportunity the finger and take on the self-destructive path to nowhere.

Since I never heard of this Sophie Cahill chick, I can’t say she’s doing the same thing, but if she is, I’d probably pay at least 15 dollars a song to touch her fake titties.

Posted in:Drunk|flash|Panties|sophie cahill|Topless|Unsorted

2007

03

Jul

I am – Eva Longoria Bikini Ass of the Day

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I was talking to a few blogs the other day and they told me shit about how companies approach them to buy them out all the time and advertisers beg them to be on their sites and I realize that I am really doing something wrong because I never get those emails.

I guess I am too hardcore for a mainstream company to want to be a part of and my commentary is pretty irrelevant and has nothing to do with anything really. It isn’t reporting celebrity news, it isn’t changing lives, it isn’t even informative for people looking to better themselves. If I knew how to read I would have taken the time to read a book on how to start a business and it would probably tell me to identify a need and deliver to that need.

It turns out that there’s no real value in what I do. This site is pretty much a waste of space. It barely even entertains the 7 people who check it out daily. So maybe I am having a mid-life crisis trying to find a purpose in life or maybe trying to find something a little more relevant to society than doing what I do but in the meantime in trying to figure all that shit out I am going to leave you with these Eva Longoria bikini ass pictures….

I think what it really comes down to is that there is a place in the world for everyone. I walked into a Subway yesterday because I had to take a shit and my wife made the bathroom off limits for the afternoon, evening and as it turned out part of today too. I don’t know what died in her colon but whatever it was it had a lasting impact on my day. Anyway, I was at Subway at about 10 pm and I saw two socially awkward looking people. The chick was a heavy midget with one leg shorter than the other and the guy was kinda tall and awkward and looked like he was from another country.

These two people were playing MAGIC Cards, for those of you who don’t know, this is the shit that virgins who like wizards love, and I realized that these two people were on a fucking date. Instead of instinctively laughing at them, like I would have when I was a teenager, I felt happy that they found each other. Two seemingly socially awkward losers playing creepy socially awkward card games were getting more sex than you.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Eva Longoria|Unsorted

2007

03

Jul

I am – Jessica Simpson Rock Solid of the Day

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So Jessica Simpson has been hitting the gym hard enough to have pretty ripped calves when she flexes. I was never into girls showing off their muscles, but that was less about them reminding me of men and more about me feeling like a pussy.

She’s got sturdy legs, she’d be good a lifting or maybe working as a mover or a wrestler or one of those chicks who men hire to choke-hold them with her legs while wearing lingerie, but it’s safe to say that she’s no man and that her calves are hardly that manly.

What it comes down to is that I can deal with some muscular legs any day of the week but that could be because I am married to a pile of fucking transfat who has fucking fat that hangs over her stupid fat chick shoes. She’s cellulite ridden everywhere including the tops of her feet, there are folds at least 3 inches deep in 4 different places from her knees down and she’s got all kind of rashes, discoloration, varicose veins, burst blood vessels and a sticky fucking film anywhere you touch that would make you sick, so lookin’ at Jessica’slegs is kinda refreshing even if it reminds me of this dude I know who quit drugs and became a triathlete, now every time I see him riding past me with shaved legs that look a lot like this I’ll have to call him Jessica.

I was just in the drug store buying topical cream for my wife’s inner thighs and saw some work out girl in her workout gear bending down to pick up some shampoo or some shit and I could see full beaver definition. the last thing I was looking at was her rippling fresh from the gym biceps, so the trick to dealing with a girl who’s got something going on that you don’t like or that reminds you of a dude or that makes you sick to your stomach is to focus on the parts you do like and the fact that strong legs allows a bitch to bounce off your dick like she’s riding a pony may make you change your opinion on Jessica and lead you to the Speed Skating Club or the Ski Team or the Bike Racing Group or the Girls Who Have Really Strong Legs Club to find your next girlfriend. Sometimes someone’s weaknesses are really their strength. It’s all about having some perspective.

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Legs|Muscles|Unsorted|Working Out

2007

03

Jul

I am – Lindsay Lohan Celebrates her Birthday in a Bikini of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan celebrated her 21st birthday out of rehab with her friends and coke addicted mom in a bikini, when I was in rehab i was told to stay away from the enablers or old friends that didn’t want to make the same changes in their life as I had. It meant dropping everyone I knew and partied with but I guess that rule doesn’t apply when the bitch who fed you cocaine when you were a teenager was your mom. The biggest supporter of the drug was the person you turned to for life advice. I don’t have proof of that shit, but I think it’s pretty obvious.

Either way, the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree or whatever that expression is, so it’s safe to say that Lohan has a life of addiction ahead of her, but so do most of us, unfortunately not all of us look have as much money as her for the shit to not ruin our lives. We also aren’t as good lookin’ as she is when she does it. It’s not that I think Lohan is hot but she’s hotter than you and even though that’s not saying much it’s saying something.

I remember I had a friend who got his mom hooked on meth with him. He was doing it for about a year until she caught him doing it and freaked the fuck out. He told her that it was diet medicine and before you could say “bust out the pipe” this middle aged suburban woman was smoking meth with him. The dad had no idea what was going on, but he didn’t complain when the house was cleaner than it ever was, her body was thinner than it was when they married, there was always big feasts cooked and dude felt like he had a new lease on life and on his marriage. He had never been happier until she emptied the bank account and ran off with her drug dealer. My friend ended up going to rehab, getting back on track, landed a good job and a wife and shit but never heard from his mother again, she’s probably sucking dick on the streets near you, so next time you hire a 60 year old drug addicted whore, you can thank him for hookin’ you up, because if she never did meth with him 10 years ago, she’d never be taking your load on her face.

I guess that’s a pretty sad story, but them’s the breaks.

Bonus


Lohan Running On Beach Almost Losing Her Top Over the Weekend
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Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Birthday|Cocaine|Lindsay Lohan|Rehab|Tits|Unsorted

2007

03

Jul

I am – Ashley Tisdale Bikini Pictures of the Day

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I don’t really know who this bitch is, I have seen her pictures around and researching a bitch was never really my thing, but today is a day of new beginnings and I took the time to find out that she’s some 22 year old chick from Disney’s stupid, but really successful smut called High School Musical. Disney is where dreams come true, that’s why every terminal kid goes there. It’s also where magic happens and that magic seems to be turning every kid they’ve every employed into a total slut. I guess a girl in a bikini doesn’t make a girl a slut, but I like to think of wearing a bikini as a gateway outfit that leads bitches into careers in porn, partying, pregnancy and herpes. If you look at any spring break party, you’ll know what I mean.

I guess the biggest joke of all this is that I was invited to a Disney movie tonight and I went. It was called Ratatouille and it was about a rat who loved fine dining. I went because the girl I went with is into fine dining and not because she’s 7. I didn’t really know whether me being there was creepy or not because it was the late show and the average age there was about 30, but I was still a little uncomfortable. That was until I saw the dude sitting in front of me who was there alone. At least I had the excuse of Vagina for being in that theatre, he didn’t and he was just laughing at every fucking joke like he was at some stand up show and I couldn’t really grasp what brought him there. Was he a high functioning retard or someone with brain damage who only understood kid’s movies, was he an immigrant trying to learn the language, was he lookin for conversation pieces for the kids he baby sits, was he a psycho dad making sure the movie was appropriate for his own kids to see next weekend, was he into animation and checking out what’s being made, was he there looking for a future wife thinking a movie like that would draw in lonely girls who had a strong maternal instinct and who’s biological clock was ticking so much they had to go to a kids movie to fill the void? Either way, it felt nice to not be the creepiest motherfucker in the room for once.

Here are those Ashley Tisdale pictures. Enjoy her small frame that lands her roles playing a 15 year old, because jerking off to a 22 year old pretending to be 15 isn’t illegal.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Bikini|Unsorted

2007

02

Jul

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I decided that I am getting old. After getting drunk all weekend I realized that I have no memory of anything I said or did and there was a time when getting drunk wouldn’t really make me black out. I know that I made a few girls feel awkward when telling them shit like that I don’t read, I watch amateur porn, or when a group of girls were posing for the camera and their friend was trying to egg them on by throwing out “emotions” for them to act out and I screamed “you just found out you got AIDS”. It may not seem that funny, but I never said that I was funny and I thought it was funny so I guess that’s all that matters. After spending a day thinking I was going to have a heart attack yesterday and passing out before midnight, I figure that I just don’t have what it takes to be a drunk anymore. I am pretty sure I’ll keep on trying until I master it again, or die in the process, but at least I have set some goals for myself. Something I was always criticized for never doing throughout my life.

I am looking for people to help work on the website, I figure that it’s going no where with just me running it, so if you or someone you know is funny, good at video, good at webdesign, good at anything, hit me up….

Since I know you’re a loser, just click on the links of sites I checked out today, asshole


Optimus Prime Sex Tape for Publicity
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Those Nick and Vanessa Pics Will Never Hit The Internet Because They Are of them Fucking and They are Suing
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Kimmy Stewart’s Legs are Dating Tommy Lee
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Porn Chick Samantha Sterlyng Taking a Political Stand
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Girl Washes Her Ass in the Ocean…
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Girl on Girl Teaching You the Kamasutra
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Mary Kate Olsen’s Thong Exposed
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Girl in Tight Pants Dances For You
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Rebecca Gayheart Grabbin Her Husband’s Cock and More Good Stuff While in a Bikini
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Kate Beckinsale Making Out With Husband in Public. That Slut.
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Petra Nemcova Gettin’ Down at a Party
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Some Hot Naked Blonde Chick
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Lohan in Tight Spandex Working Out
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Some Topless Girl and Bikini Clad Girls Show Dudes a Good Time on the Golf Course Video
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Nicole Kidman’s Ass in Video
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Fantasia Barrino Got Her Clit Pierced
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Porn Dude Cums in some Girls Eye – NSFW
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Paris Hilton – Post Prison Fun
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Bastardly Game – Guess the Back
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Lindsay Lohan 21st Birthday Video that Will Make You Laugh
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Jessica Cirio’s Hot Ass in Hombre Magazine
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Jessica Simpson’s Wax Ass
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Nicole Richie Covers Up Her Baby Factory Gut…
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Some Flight of the Conchords Performing Their Comedy Act Because My Stepdaughter Talks About them Sometimes and Someone Sent In This Link….
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Alley Bagget Likes Coca Cola in a Bikini
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Older Lady Teaches Some Creepy Lookin’ Guy How To Bang – NSFW
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Sluts Showed Up To Celebrate Diana’s Life…Here’s Some of them
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Her Name is Aylar, and this is her Bikini Shoot Video
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Movie Critic Dies. RIP.
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Do You Want a Ride on the Dildo Cart….
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Jennifer Love Hewitt Dresses Like a Retired Granny on Vacation
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Shitty Scarlett Johansson Photoshoot
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Memories of Lohan then and Now
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Cameron Diaz is a Homewrecker
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Kristin Kreuk Takes Out The Trash
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Classical Barbie Girl
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Pam Anderson Blowing Out Birthday Candles and Not Blowing Cock
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Lohan’s Short Shorts have an iPhone
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Liz Hurley’s Son Wears a Bikini
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Hilary Duff Froze Her Sisters Panties
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Reef Girls Have Crazy Asses, Watch These Videos
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Video of Supermodels in Bikinis Playing With Meat
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Fake Tits at a Party Meet Photobucket
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Amateur Porn Chick Meet Photobucket
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Some Cam Chick Interviewed on Radio Naked
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Hipster Bitch in a Band Called Stink Mitt Giving Herself a Frontal Wedgie
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Buy your September 11th Commemorative Coin Made Out Of Silver Recovered at Ground Zero
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Dude Pisses on a Cop Car and gets Arrested
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A Day in the Life of Tera Patrick
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Guy Tries to Steal a Mic on Live TV
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2 Blonde Chicks Making Out
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Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
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Some Music Video Set to Topless Scenes in Movies
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Tina O’Brien is Some Hot UK Soap Chick and here she is Posing
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Crazy Girls Drunk and Topless at the Pool
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7-Eleven’s Become the Qwik-E-Mart For The Simpson’s Movie
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This Site Has More Good Links For YOu
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This Spray Will Get You Laid…And Who Doesn’t Like Getting Laid???
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Bonus Link via Email

I am part of an online 4 wheel driving club that met up today locally..

Well, this kid showed up with his dad and i thought there was something odd about him.

He later posted pictures from todays event, apparently forgetting what else he had in his photobucket album

GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

02

Jul

I am – More of Paris Hilton in a Bathing Suit in Maui of the Day

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I came across these pictures of Paris in a bathing suit in Maui and figured I should post them since celebrity in bikinis is 90 percent of what I do. I don’t consider Paris to be a real celebrity, I don’t think she’s got anything interesting going on, I don’t really understand the reason everyone is so interested in her, but she’s on the beach and that’s more than I can say for you, so that is why she gets coverage on this shitty site. Reality is that I am pretty easy to please and half naked is all I really ever need for a post, so I don’t mind making your famous, if you’re willing to take it off.

I was reading an article on MSN about how to seduce billionaires to marry you. I am exploring new business options because the internet isn’t doin it for me and there’s gotta be some black sheep fat retarded daughter of a rich dude that they keep locked up in the basement who is lonely enough for someone like me. I don’t know where the article is but it lead me to all these different high society sites. I didn’t realize that people actually care about the family and kids and wives of these extremely rich dudes. I always thought their lives were boring with all that keeping up appearances, going to art gallery exhibits and donating time and money to charity. There are probably scandals that would be more interesting than the shit Paris gets into and there are probably nude pics, sex tapes and other exciting scandals filling up their guest houses, but I’ll never see them because I have no idea who any of these high society people are.

I need Entertainment Tonight and Access Hollywood to let me know who to watch out for and not all these rich kids aren’t into the whole L.A. Fame Game.

I did harass a couple of them on Facebook a while ago. One of them was the daughter of some record exec and another one was the daughter of some other big company. It turns out that they have no sense of humor and either do I, that’s why this post fucking sucks. It happens. It’s Monday. I hate you.

I guess it’s nice to see Paris back on all fours and half naked as she rides her surfboard, because it reminds us that Jail can’t change a person, except for maybe giving someone more publicity than they have seen since the release of a sex tape.

Posted in:Ass|Bathing Suit|Beach|Maui|Paris Hilton|Unsorted