SFW Archives - Page 35 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2020

15

Jan

Dove Cameron Sports Bra of the Day

Dove Cameron is some 24 year old with a weird nose….who positions herself as an actress and singer because who doesn’t….I mean I’ve met girls who work retail who call themselves actresses and singers…just working on building things out working the cash at the grocery store you know…

According to her WIKIPEDIA, she was bullied through high school, but powered through and followed her dreams which became a reality….

Her claim to fame is playing two characters in the same movie and I guess other shit..and now she’s famous…or more famous and like all all famous people they put out self produced smut to inspire their audience of 12 years old to follow their lead in trying to get noticed or ahead ….another reason I am happy I am not a dad…imagine having a kid in this era of SHIT…

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Posted in:Dove Cameron|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Half Naked Models for Fashion of the Day

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The CR Fashion Book is out and each model is a different horoscope because that is how high concept for fashion works when you’re fucking lazy and just riding off the reputation of your over hyped, but “connected” magazine brand. It’s like bitch who runs it is a famewhore celebrity groupie scenester and in turn she gets more credibility than she deserves because she’s actually out of touch dog shit….at least that’s what this shoot tells me.

CR Fashion Book is the magazine that I always reference when talking about Gigi Hadid, because her pervert model fucking dad paid 1,000,000 dollars to the magazine to give her a cover, you know to keep things credible because they aren’t journalists…they are whores.

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Posted in:CR Fashion Book|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Blake Lively See Through of the Day

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I didn’t give a fuck about Blake Lively when her whole Gossip Girl bullshit happened, so I’m not about to give a fuck about Blake Lively a decade later….

What I do find funny is that the media recycle the canned press release her team or the team marketing the movie put out, not that I’ve seen that press release, I am not relevant enough for Hollywood types to beg for free coverage on their bullshit….but the press release definitely read “Blake Lively Unrecognizable for her New Role”…and the truth is Blake Lively is unrecognizable as Blake Lively….being Blake Lively…let’s try to not over hype her cuz her Husband she stole from that pig Scarjo has a hit comic franchise…

I assume she’s playing some Betty Page – Pin Up girl….1950s slut…because having your tits out is timeless…as is your gut busting out over your panties…muffin top cuz bitch is a fucking mom – don’t we have hotter and younger talent to choose from?!

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Posted in:Blake Lively|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini of the Day

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I’ve never found Alessandra Ambrosio hot.

So now that she’s pushing 40 or 50 or however old she is, I can’t tell because she’s only done the same thing on fucking repeat for the last 20 years, that feel like the last 50 years, since I don’t find her hot…..I definitely don’t find her hot…

I guess my opinion doesn’t fucking matter, she’s made millions a year selling bullshit panties for a company that financed Epstein (google it), it’s not important work, if anything it just promotes globalization, the loss of American business, making China richer, and all by a Brazilian who isn’t even American….

So when I look at her I see evil….other than that she’s still fit and vain and uses that to make real life women feel like shit about themselves because they don’t have bodies like her…

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Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Sarah Michelle Gellar Swimsuit of the Day

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Sarah Michelle Gellar, the Freddie Prinze Jr fucking, Scooby Doo acting, overhyped trash from the 90s, despite being a mom of 2 who has been off the radar for at least a decade to focus on things like living on her celebrity money, is out here in a bathing suit for you perverts to jerk off to her like it was still the 90s….

I remember a time when she was in EVERYTHING thanks to that VIRGIN NERD LOSER phenomenom that happened with Buffy the Vampire Slayer the Series, something I NEVER watched and will NEVER watch, but that every chronic masturabtor seemed to watch and fetishize about Sarah Michelle Gellar despite her being Sarah Michelle Gellar.

I remember I Know What you Did Last Summer….and all the other garbage she got into….and I don’t remember any of it that foundly and I sure as hell don’t think this is her best work. A ambien looking mom in her expensive house isn’t a fetish of mine, I aim more for daughters than mothers…..but that doesn’t he actress who got her start in Soaps at Age four, so you know she’s nice a fucked up, is clearly out here promoting some shit…because she’s obviously promoting some shit…all the celebs are…giving more reason for new social networks to start up…the Facebook all day informercial of lame content is fucking dull.

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Posted in:Sarah Michelle Gellar|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Rihanna Lingerie of the Day

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I don’t reinvent the wheel of posting titty pics of celebs being sluts, I am basically the same as all the other losers posting titty pics of celebs, like it’s important or like it is news, or like it is hot when I actually hate pop culture and celebs, which happens to upset the kind of people into pics of titty pics of celebs…leaving me cold, scared and alone….

So there’s a lot of repetition in what I do, thanks to people like Rihanna having a lot of repetition in what she does, and then all the other latch ons doing the exact same thing other celebs do to stay current, then there’s all the influencers doing their best impression of celebs…and do the same thing they do…making it one pile of slutty content to sieve through. So I don’t expect revolutionary commentary….it’s not like I even get paid to do this….

So in keeping up my repetitive dialogue, I was told by a BAJAN (man from Barbados) that Rihanna’s dad was a garbage man, she lived in basically a shanty, was poor as shit by Barbados standards, like the kid in school who didn’t have running water and smelled like her period all the time….but more interestingly, he told me she turned tricks at 14 through a network of Karaoke bars the tourists would go to….and Barbados being a British Colony that is more developed than a HAITI….meant rich British people would go there to get some son. High profile people have homes there, from Simon Cowell to who the fuck cares…there’s entertainers and athletes and all kinds of pervert rich dudes into the 15 year old Karaoke hooker…so much so that they brought her to America at 14, got her all her work visas and made her Rihanna….

Girls who have talent and live in NYC can’t even get record deals…and Rihanna was never all that special, ANYONE could have been her….but they chose her…why? That’s for you to figure out, that’s the great unknown…but the rich and bloated Rihanna has running water now…so I guess it all worked out for her….as she continues to post her half naked content to sell product cuz she’s Rihanna….and has always been selling her product / self….

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Posted in:Rihanna|SFW

2020

15

Jan

Jessica Alba Sweaty Tits of the Day

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Jessica Alba is looking like your grandma who just figured out her phone she got for Christmas has a front Camera, but she can’t quite figure out how to go back to the regular camera…which makes sense because bitch is old, but I guess not that old, maybe more entitled and coddled and used to having her personal assistant do everything for her, so that she doesn’t need to use her brain on anything but trying to act her way through being an “Honorary” CEO of a tech / e-commerce company like she was GOOP…but far less controversial, or talked about, despite being far hotter.

At least she realizes that despite being a 40 year old mom of 3, we still want to see her sweaty tits in her sports bra, because we remember those tits at their prime, when they weren’t out there making babies, but rather out there getting herpes. Memories….

The only funny Gossip I know about Alba, is that her husband was such an Alba fan that he made a deal with her when they first got together, knowing he wasn’t an A Lister or that rich, and that deal was that they would have a family together, build a business together and that she’d be allowed to fuck around with other dudes, the ultimate CUCK, only he’s not invited to watch her when she fucks the A-Listers…a story that may be fake, but I think is true, and funny in all her pics….not quite as funny as this filtered up herpe looking face….but funny nonetheless.

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Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2020

14

Jan

Rainey Qualley Nudity of the Day

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Rainey Qualley is some ugly trash that you’d never see on this site, even though she pulls her tits out, unless she was the daughter of a celebrity.

In this case, her mom is Model and Actress Andie MacDowell and her dad is model Paul Qualley and she is proof that two wrongs don’t make a right, or in this case two hot people don’t make a hot person.

We’ve posted up her sister, who is also in LA whoring herself out for her career in entertainment despite playing the whole born and raised in Asheville, North Carolina.

I don’t understand why celebrity kids like to be packaged like they were so far removed from the industry that afforded them the good life…yet they all end up in LA being whores for attention.

It’s like the WILLIS sisters, all I’ve ever heard about this is how normal they are thanks to being raised in Idaho on the family compound, ok….but then why are they in LA at the family compound posting asshole incest selfies…because they weren’t raised wholesome and far removed from the shit, they are in fact so close to the shit, that they are the shit, and not “You da shit” kind of shit, but that fucking stain in your underwear cuz you can’t control your bowels kind of shit.

What I am trying to say, and I am not sure if I got the message across is that these celebs who think they are raising their kids to be better, yet they all end up back in LA being bratty spoiled entitled rich kids using their family connections to get seen…in this case with their tits out…

Either way, she’s an “actress” and a “singer. Sure she is.

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Posted in:Rainey Qualley|SFW

2020

14

Jan

Maya Hawke’s got her Titties Out of the Day

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I used to make fun of girl’s with weak chins, just because I knew they would hate it. I used to ask them why they were swallowing their faces, or why their mouths were permanently open, they genuinely freaked me the fuck out. I know of at least one girl who had fake tits, so this isn’t all that crazy, but who got a chin implant after my mocking. Clearly, I was what pushed her over the edge. She clearly knew she looked all dopey and shit due to the weak chin.

It may have something to do with my facial recognition blindness, which is a genuine condition that makes everyone look like a new person to me, basically every time I see them, which also makes running this site funny, because I don’t recognize shit. Anyone could be anyone and I’ll run with it. I can watch movies and barely even connect serious stars to the parts they are playing.

I don’t mind it now, one of my favorite actors is Rebecca Hall, who also has a weak chin, but I do find it funny when I see someone who I’ve only seen posing with the right angles, while all done up, posing at the wrong angle…cuz this is the WRONG fucking angle.

Luckily for her, Mom is Uma Thurman, Dad is Ethan Hawke and she’s got tits….I believe that weak chin or not…girl’s got a long career ahead of her from those reasons alone.

Now you can all imagine her gagging on your cock, because that’s her permanent facial expression…due to her facial structure…

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Posted in:maya hawke|SFW

2020

14

Jan

Lily Rose Depp Ass Shot of the Day

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When you look at Lily Rose Depp’s ass, do you automatically think “I wonder if Johnny Depp’s ass looks this good, or would he need to take estrogen to get it to this level, because I love Johnny Depp, his career is like Tom Hanks or Matt Damons or even Leo DiCaprios, you know ICONIC. Or do you think Johnny Depp’s got the best CUM, look at what it made….my cum just makes a mess…what can’t this legend do…he’s iconic”…because I feel 90 percent of Lily Rose Depp’s hype is dudes who are just way too into Johnny Depp….their little Pirate of the Caribbean if you will….but not open to the idea of being queer…so they just channel that admiration into sexualizing his daughter…wanting to Edward Penishand her (one of the more important porn parodies of yesteryear)….

I’m personally indifferent on the whole Johnny Depp aspect of Lily Rose Depp, I never think of the dad’s when I get off to a girl, it’s not my thing, even when it’s a tactic of revenge. “Oh you took my parking spot neighbor, I’m gonna fuck your daughter” by the time the fucking starts I forget my whole motive, and don’t be impressed his daughter was a wheelchair bound half retard who lived in their apartment because they couldn’t afford an institution but don’t worry….I still fucked her good.

What I am trying to say is…I like Lily Rose Depp for being Lily Rose Depp…which I am sure none of her friends do. Because I love the plight of the celebrity child. I find it weird and hilarious especially when they are posting gratuitous ass pics in their jeans for attention…like they don’t have enough in their fucking lives to just not bother with social media.

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Posted in:Lily Rose Depp|SFW

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