Tits Archives - Page 70 of 79 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

11

Jul

I am – Petra Nemcova Body Painting of the Day

Marie-Eve here, again. Apparently Jesus’ computer is on the fritz, so I’m gonna be doing the posts a tad early while hes getting ready for his Cruise. I’ve been getting some lovely emails from some of you and also some that are pretty creepy, but keep them coming, I love it!! stepdaughter@drunkenstepfather.com

Here’s some pics of Petra Nemcova and some other lucky, lucky person messing around with some body paint, which I guess is what super models do when they aren’t at fashion shoots on tropical islands, going to swanky parties, and having sex with millionaires.

They have this sort of outdoor festival where I live every Sunday, and its always filled with a bunch of old and young hippies, plus a few normal people that go up there just for the hell of it. You’ll always see a good amount of idiots playing the drums, blowing bubbles and dancing in circles and urging you to join in on the love fest. The last time I was up there, there was a bunch of them body painting each other, and of course one thing led to another and a few of the girls took their tops off to let some of the guys (who looked like the forest had just thrown them up) paint their tits.

As always, it wasn’t the hott looking pixie hippies that chose to undress, but the fat, unshaven, pasty white ones instead. Why does it always go down like like? Can some one explain it to me, please? Why is it that the most disgusting people are always the ones that are the most comfortable with themselves? Anyone?

Here’s some shots of Petra to ease the pain of people who don’t know how to cover up.

2007

10

Jul

I am – Jenna Jameson at some Party of the Day

16 Comments »

I don’t find Jenna Jameson hot at all. I know she’s a dirty washed up porn slut who everyone gives credit to for being such a great business woman in writing books, producing porn, selling molds of her cunt and doing whatever else she does to make money, but when I look at her I just see a whore and I have never really had anything against whores, I’d pay them for sex and shit, but I never wanted to make them my girlfriend and when I could jerk off I’d never jerk off to them, because the thought of being so dirty and loose in the hips, always made me more sick to my stomach than anything else.

I am not trying to say that I would only prey on virgins, but there was a time when I’d meet girls in bars and we’d get to talking and they’d tell me how many dude’s they had banged in their lifetime and I’d take the drink I bought them out of their hand and dump it out on the floor, because it’s easy for a bitch to get cock, all they have to do is leave the house and when a bitch gets as much cock as someone like Jenna, they have emotional issues. In her case, I get that it’s her job, but it’s not a very hard job to get in and being successful at what she does is a lot easier than getting that promotion at the shitty office you work at. If the world worked like a porn movie, the richest people in the world would be the ones who can take the most dicks in their ass, and that is why I have no respect for this talentless prostitute.

I knew this stripper who I’d run into on the street and shit, outside the club and working hours. She was always with a different guy. When I asked her where she met all these dudes, she would say at work or at clubs. I would ask why she hangs with them and she’d say because they buy me stuff, they take me on vacation and take me to nice restaurants. When I told her that she was a whore because she made it clear that she would bang them, she said something like it’s not like they pay me in cash. Point being that money hungry bitches who know that loser dudes pay for their company and use their pussies to get ahead are trash.

Either way, I figured I’d post pictures of her partying to remind you that disgusting sluts are out there and people like you like them

2007

10

Jul

I am – Hilary Swank Bikini Pictures of the Day

5 Comments »

If I was a real blogger I’d write that bitch was wrong in saying Boys Don’t Cry because she never got in a bikini for them to put that theory to test. She probably hasn’t pulled out her dick in the movie and raped anyone either, but I do know that there are some things that make a guy cry.

Hilary Swank has only been hot in one role, and that’s Boys Don’t Cry, because even though she looked like a dude, I still got to see her stuff Becky from Roseanne with a dildo and at the time it came out lesbians had little place in the World, except maybe for Ellen or this bitch who worked at the laundry mat down the street from me who always gave me dirty looks because I had a penis…

Reality is, I am trying to get ready for this cruise my wife went on. She isn’t coming with me anymore because I convinced her that I needed to get away from her and that she wouldn’t fit on the plane, fit in a bathing suit or fit in the deck chairs they had lined up by the pool. I am not as excited as I should be about this cruise because someone told me everything costs money once you’re there, I am not into being locked in a floating mall with a bunch of old ladies for 2 days without seeing land, and I have never travelled. Today’s goal was to go out and get sedatives from the doctor because health care is free, but I slept in and now I am forced to come back to this site and post shit you’ve already seen about Hilary Swank’s shrunken tits and horseface. I don’t mind, I am actually going to miss doing this everyday and that’s more embarrassing than when Hilary Swank’s testicles fall out of her bikini and into the fag she’s dating’s mouth….

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Hilary Swank|Tits|Unsorted

2007

09

Jul

I am – Hayden Panettiere Bikini Pictures of the Day

1 Comment »

Everyone has been writing about this girl like she’s the next Lohan, I was always confused about it because she looks like a fucking troll. I was thinking that at first she was a make a wish foundation candidate and people were just giving a terminally ill girl her dream, but her career has been too long lived for it to be a make a wish deal and people seem to just ignore the fact that she is or looks disabled.

She does remind me of this one girl I banged once. She was pretty sad and lonely and no one liked her because she was 4 foot 4. She had only had never had a boyfriend, but had sex with anyone willing, unfortunately I was one of those guys. She insisted that I don’t use a condom, and what that happens I insist on using one, because she didn’t know me for more than about 45 mins before ending up naked in the back alley of a bar. Either way, when I was done, I had to tie the condom in a knot and put it in my pocket because I was convinced she was so desperate that she’d take the fucking thing and try to knock herself up.

Either way, to those who find this Panettier bitch hot, here she is half naked.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Hayden Panettiere|Tits|Unsorted

2007

09

Jul

I am – Brooke Hogan Bikini Pictures of the Day

2 Comments »

Here are some pictures of Brooke Hogan on the beach in a bikini lookin’ alright for Brooke Hogan.

The funny thing about bikinis like this is that they are pretty fucking revealing. I was looking at these pictures before posting them and I could see her full vagina. I can tell where there’s meat and where there isn’t and that’s pretty much the closest thing there is to seeing her sprawled out on a bed diddling herself naked. When a girl is just rockin’ underwear, you don’t see this kind of definition and this post may make me seem creepy as fucking hell but I am not the only one thinking this. I was talking to a friend who just went to some public pool who went off about how he doesn’t understand why guys focus on tits and asses when girls are around them in bikinis, you just have to look at the crotch and pretty much see everything they have to offer. My friend is also a 3 time sex offender so maybe it is a little creepy.

Eitehr way, I want to go off on how Brooke Hogan is thick and disgusting and has a broken down pick up truck of a face and looks like a man but these pictures don’t bother me, she’s tight bodied and bigger and now that I know she’s got a box and not balls, I am way more into her and her cheap stripper ways than I was before.

2007

09

Jul

I am – Lisa Rinna is a Fucking Clown of the Day

3 Comments »

Lisa Rinna hasn’t done much since Melrose Place. If you are wondering why I know she was on Melrose Place, it’s because I keep track of all celebrities or semi-celebrities with big tits and a ton of plastic surgery, it’s kind of a hobbie. I also used to do pretty hard drugs in 1996 that left me on various couches with a group of people who were in love with the show and followed it like it was a fucking cult. I think one guy even got the shit tattooed on his back or something because he was crazy and thought he was living in the show but that’s not important.

What is important is seeing a bitch pick herself up from the depths of getting no work, and realize her place in society and that is being a clown at birthday parties. Here are some pictures of her in action but not in costume because if she gave the whole act away, no one would want to hire her.

I am really only posting these because her nipples are hard, she’s wet and she’s more flexible than my wife, which isn’t saying much, I think the Fridge is more flexible than her because it opens. I guess she’s just had nothing better to do than work out the last 11 years…

2007

09

Jul

I am – Pam Anderson Parties in Hooters Uniform of the Day

9 Comments »

I know that Pam Anderson was one of the lucky big breasted sluts who didn’t have to spend her career taking orders at the local hooters. She was one of those big breasted girls who was able to get in Playboy and land roles in shows like Baywatch that gave her celebrity status for having big tits, while most big breasted sluts were forced to work for tips or work the pole to pay off the tit implants but that didn’t stop her from reminding us all that she knows her role in the world.

Reality is that I am posting these pictures because seeing drunk old ladies is a bit of a fetish of mine. Whenever I get to a bar and see them in the corner alone, preying on young dudes with their tits flopping all over the place, I am compelled to watch like shit’s something you’d see on the nature channel. I know that unsuspecting dudes can’t fight off their years of training with men and when a bitch tells you to fuck her it’s pretty hard to say no, especially when you know she’s got a husband at home and a lot of experience and pent up sex drive that will destroy your cock.

I am also posting these because bitch has a pretty controlled cameltoe going down, and this is the kind of girl who you’d expect to see vagina lips hanging out of the bottom of her shorts, and having such a big vagina under control and seemingly normal sized is something worth celebrating. Maybe it’s something that takes years to master and that skill is probably part of the reason she made it to where she has today…

2007

09

Jul

I am – Tera Patrick’s huge rack of the day

1 Comment »

Tera Patrick at Crobar

My stepdaughter is pretty bored this summer and has taking an interest in what I do, so I decided to let her post here and manage the site when I leave for the cruise my wife won this week. She’s 18. She’s been raised properly by me since she was 12 and if I didn’t think she was good enough to pick up my slack, I wouldn’t let her take this shit over for the few weeks I am gone. So this is her first post.

I have no idea who Tera Patrick is, but apparently she was a special guest at Crobar in Chicago and made an appearance a few nights ago. Iâ€™m guessing she is some sort of celebrity, or they wouldnâ€™t have invited her to host anything, anywhere, and judging by the stuffed Hello Kitty doll, her cheap looking dress which was probably really expensive and her gigantic rack, Iâ€™m gonna say sheâ€™s a porn star.

There was a girl in the fourth grade named Beth who stole my boy friend, cause she had developed faster then all of us, gave blow jobs and had huge tits, while the rest of us just wanted to hold hands and play Pogs. It gave me this great anxiety complex where I was completely disgusted with my own body for a few years after and wore baggy clothes to completely cover it up. Everyone (mostly guys) always told me not to be worried about it, but I have a feeling that if every person they walked by could see the size of their cock and judge it as they wished, they would be changing their tune pretty fucking fast.

I went through a phase about 2 years ago where regardless of how nice they were, I wanted implants, and I was going to get them if it was the last thing I did. I even went as far as to start saving the money from my shitty job I still have at Dairy Queen to get them, looked into doctors, the whole nine yards. Luckily, one doctor I met with wasnâ€™t a money grubbing prick, and instead of showing me lovely after pictures of happy women with their enlarged breasts, he showed me a video of the operation and how the women looked like they had been in a fucking car wreck after. He told me to get fuck out of his office and that was pretty much the end of me wanting implants. I suddenly had a new appreciation for my small, but nice, tits.

I ran into to Beth not long ago, it looked like her ass had finally caught up to those huge tits, and that all those huge tits and blow jobs got her was 2 kids, a welfare check and a black eye I’m presuming she got from which ever guy she is currently sleeping with. Serves you right, bitch. Heres some more pics of Tera Patrick. Her huge tits and blow jobs made her a fortune.

Related Posts I am – Tera Patrick Halloween of the Day
GO I am – Born Again Porn Stars Myspace Profile of the Day
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GO

2007

09

Jul

I am – Tera Patrick's huge rack of the day

1 Comment »

Tera Patrick at Crobar

My stepdaughter is pretty bored this summer and has taking an interest in what I do, so I decided to let her post here and manage the site when I leave for the cruise my wife won this week. She’s 18. She’s been raised properly by me since she was 12 and if I didn’t think she was good enough to pick up my slack, I wouldn’t let her take this shit over for the few weeks I am gone. So this is her first post.

I have no idea who Tera Patrick is, but apparently she was a special guest at Crobar in Chicago and made an appearance a few nights ago. I’m guessing she is some sort of celebrity, or they wouldn’t have invited her to host anything, anywhere, and judging by the stuffed Hello Kitty doll, her cheap looking dress which was probably really expensive and her gigantic rack, I’m gonna say she’s a porn star.

There was a girl in the fourth grade named Beth who stole my boy friend, cause she had developed faster then all of us, gave blow jobs and had huge tits, while the rest of us just wanted to hold hands and play Pogs. It gave me this great anxiety complex where I was completely disgusted with my own body for a few years after and wore baggy clothes to completely cover it up. Everyone (mostly guys) always told me not to be worried about it, but I have a feeling that if every person they walked by could see the size of their cock and judge it as they wished, they would be changing their tune pretty fucking fast.

I went through a phase about 2 years ago where regardless of how nice they were, I wanted implants, and I was going to get them if it was the last thing I did. I even went as far as to start saving the money from my shitty job I still have at Dairy Queen to get them, looked into doctors, the whole nine yards. Luckily, one doctor I met with wasn’t a money grubbing prick, and instead of showing me lovely after pictures of happy women with their enlarged breasts, he showed me a video of the operation and how the women looked like they had been in a fucking car wreck after. He told me to get fuck out of his office and that was pretty much the end of me wanting implants. I suddenly had a new appreciation for my small, but nice, tits.

I ran into to Beth not long ago, it looked like her ass had finally caught up to those huge tits, and that all those huge tits and blow jobs got her was 2 kids, a welfare check and a black eye I’m presuming she got from which ever guy she is currently sleeping with. Serves you right, bitch. Heres some more pics of Tera Patrick. Her huge tits and blow jobs made her a fortune.

Related Posts I am – Tera Patrick Halloween of the Day
GO I am – Born Again Porn Stars Myspace Profile of the Day
GO I am – stepTV Does Debbie Does Dallas Again
GO

2007

05

Jul

I am – ebay Slut of the Day

1 Comment »

I am not a very good business person, because if I was, I probably wouldn’t be doing this site, but I do know that marketing is pretty fucking basic on the internet. If you want people to look at your shit, you need to post pictures of sluts. So this ebay vendor who sells used clothes, found a slut in his hometown and got her to model the shit he is selling.

The reason I am posting this is almost out of sympathy. I know girls like this bitch who think they are a lot fucking hotter than they are. They dress in slutty cheap clothes, give off crazy attitude, get breast implants, lame tattoos, double tongue piercings and bad dye jobs. They date dudes they meet at the gym or the tanning salon, and they look up to pornstars and strippers but have more ambition than that so they take on their first modeling job they can get, thinking it will launch them into the world as the next hot thing, the next Tila Tequila, maybe a stint in Playboy or hosting parties around the country, but reality is that the fun ends here, with this ebay gig because the rest of the world sees past you skinny frame, stuffed bra, fake tan, weak chin and non existent ass.

Either way, I assume some of you fuckers are into girls like this and it’s a nice change from celebrity content so I decided to post it.

Visit her ebay profile it Will Link to All Her ebay Sales Pages with all her Pictures…
GO