Normally getting anything “Mexico” stamped on anything you do is a pretty bad sign, you know since us Mexicans are looked down upon in America. We are seen as the bottom feeders who don’t belong there and our own country is seen as only worth the beaches and Spring Break parties, but it’s nice to see that Mexico has their own GQ magazine that showcases things that are more than just Donkey Shows, how to jump the border, how to work slower than any other human in the fucking world, or local talent like America Ferrira and Eva Longoria and have moved into the likes of Rihanna, who I want to fuck…..especially when Photoshopped in her bikini, cuz she looks better that way. Viva Mexico!
I don’t know whether this is good news or bad news, but if you like these pictures of Shauna Sand and her dirty fucking pussy and dirty fucking titties and dirty fucking ass rubbing lotion on some poor motherfucker, you can make that shit your own reality because she charges by the hour and her fee is pretty fucking affordable, because the more she looks like death, the harder time she’s having finding clients and blaming the economin crisis isn’t goin to pay the fuckin’ rent, if you know what I mean.
I am just hoping she’s wearing some kind of waterproof pantyliner, or maybe some duct tape to close that gaping flesh wound, because I’d hate to see the sludge from her pussy ruin a perfectly good bikini.
So Kim Kardashian’s still doing her workout video, which means she’s gotta get in shape before they start filming, which is exactly what I want out of the person I am using to inspire me to get in shape. You know, someone who was a fat slob of a girl known for having a fat ass and fat tits, who decided that should could make money off this great new concept, so she goes into hardcore workout mode between now and April, so by the time of shooting the DVD she’ll be in good enough shape to make the people who buy it, not use it for jerk off purposes while eating donuts. But you all know as soon as the DVD is shot, she’ll be back to her old ways, this lie is just a money making scheme and I hope it fails, as it fucking should, because she’s got no fucking business talking about anything that involves being fit.
So you all know how strongly I feel about incest. You know if there was any cause I’d raise money for it’d be incest, because I feel like if you make ’em, they are yours to do what you want with them.
I just wanted to showcase a leader in our cause, a 93 year old man named Philippe Hamelin, who was convicted for incest and the judge decided was not fit for prison for the crimes he committed, because his daughters turned on him and ratted him out, claiming he ruined their life, when he was probably just trying to show them the ropes, like any father would. Unappreciative assholes.
So the judge said he is already serving a Life Sentence in his body or some shit, which is funny because aren’t we fucking all? I guess he just needed an excuse to not put someone doing a perfectly natural thing away and the whole 93 year old factor was good enough to still look like he’s not advocating sex with his daughter, when everyone knows it’s an outdated law….
I just woke up. Good morning sunshine. Yes, I am talking to you.
I need an internet losers help to program something on this site so that I don’t have to waste time on it like I have been the last 5 years. I kinda want to free up my free time and dedicate it to something more productive, like trying to convince girls to get naked on webcam, or even taking up river dancing like Michael Flately, but in order to do that, I need some virgin power. Email me. Thanks.
I was just contemplating hanging out at the local gas station and asking them what air freshner they use for their bathrooms, but decided to sit on my couch instead. The winter takes away all my fun.
Jessica Simpson always had the tits of a fat chick, she was just never fat because she had the motivation and drive of a girl who wanted to make it, and she knew that no fat girls make it, so she traded the Texas BBQ for some LA rabbit food and a treadmill. I knew that her move back into country and her move back to Texas from the popstar life, was going to shape her into a new person, a nice fat new person. I guess you can’t fight genetics forever. So here are some pics of Jessica Simpson and her gunt to celebrate good ol’ southern cookin’.
She is a fuckin’ beast, it’s like Tony Romo did this to her because he wanted her to look more like a defensive line so he could actually get turned on when they fuck. She’s so fat, she even needs two fucking belts to keep her belly from dragging on the fucking ground and the whole thing fucking disgusts me.
I can’t help but post these Coleen Rooney Pictures, mainly because there are so many of them circulating the internet, and because after last week I’ve become obsessed with this girl and her pudgy little upper pussy area. I don’t know what it is, maybe it’s that her name is Coleen and I’ve always wanted to fuck a girl with such a dirt name, but I think it just has to do with me being a desperate fucking pervert who can distort everyday garbage into finding at least something arrousing about it and it this case it has nothing to do with her tits that are too small for her thick frame and everything to do with that shit stain on her ass that no matter how many times she swims, never seems to go away…. Here are those pictures of her keeping busy in a bunch of different bikinis…because having a different bikini for everyday of the year is what the life of luxury is all about…and part of the reason she married her rich soccer husband instead of dumping him like most high school sweethearts do….
Janice DIckinson offers to do a porn tape with the paparazzi, because she’s one of those too horny for her own good bitches. It’s too bad that it was just a joke, because I love to see her dry weathered, coked up vagina do some circus tricks on tape. I hear the motherfuckin thing is just as crazy as her and after a few cocktails, it throws a tantrum, cries, then drinks some more, before puking all over some random dude’s dick, because it likes the attention.
It’s nice to see that America hasn’t got too much jungle fever and hasn’t lost their morals and values by deciding that black people don’t need to win every competition and election they participate in during this week’s Miss America shit. I mean sure, it’s politically correct and deserved, because they are a people who have been oppressed by the white man their entire existence in North America, I mean the only reason they were even brought over was to be slaves to the white man, and it is okay for them to have their time to shine, but there’s no need to get repetitive and predictible and give every black person who runs the prize, or the job, or even your seat on the bus, unless they really deserve it and go above and beyond what you’d want out of a winner. You gotta keep them on their toes a little and not let them think they’ve broke down all boundaries and won their cause because it’ll fuck up the whole fabric of America.
Truthfully, I don’t care who wins this garbage, beauty pageants make no fucking sense to me, considering the girls involved are generally not beautiful, and because they distract from the whole beauty thing by letting them talk. I also like seeing the black people take over the USA because white people are fucking boring, I just like to make you think I don’t for dramatic purposes.
Here’s some of the swimsuit potion of the contest….because I am hoping you weren’t watching this shit….
And here’s one of the talent show components freaking me the fuck out….
Kelly Rowland was out on the beach, doing the only thing that makes sense and that’s getting a little sun, because I guess she doesn’t feel dark enough now that’s she’s made all this money in the white man’s world by appealing to white girls. I like to call this shit getting back to her roots and keeping it real, even if the concept of black folk tanning makes no fucking sense to me. On a side note, she has fake tits and forgot her bikini, but you probably already figured that part out on your own. Forget what every teacher, boss, family member and friend has ever said about you being a fucking moron who will amount to nothing, you just proved yourself to be a genius to me and sure that may not get you anywhere in life, but sometimes that pat on the back is all you need.
