SFW Archives - Page 38 of 1169 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2020

13

Jan

All the Tits at the Critics Choice Awards of the Day

The Critics Choice awards happened and for some reason, I wasn’t invited.

I sometimes think about what the fuck I am, you know when the bank asks me what my profession is for that credit card application. I am not a writer, I don’t know how to write. I am not a web publisher, I barely know how to write an email. I am not a web entrepreneur because I am not a billionaire and really have no actual business. I am not a comedian because I am not funny. I update a blog, but is “blogger” a profession. Instagram has rebranded “bloggers’ to be people who take pics of their outfits of instagram.

I just live in no man’s land, but if I was anything, it’d be a critic because I love to criticize and not constructively. So I should have been invited…not that I would go. Not that award shows matter, I don’t even know if this one was even a show, or televised since TV is dead…but it brought out sluts…and here’s that round-up.

Anne Hathaway with her big princess bride tits

Charlize Theron hasn’t looked this good since MONSTER….

Florence PUGH looking for Zach Braff

TO SEE THE REST OF THE TITS AT THE AWARDS CLICK HERE

Does J.Lo have any other poses ?

Joey King protecting herself from the Aliens with the tin foil outfit- smart.

Kate Beckinsale prepared for this event with a deep pussy stretch..

Dude Margaret Qualley is so not hot..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE TITS AT THE AWARDS CLICK HERE

Nicole Kidman’s stand in wax figure attended..

Rachel Brosnahn is a tangerine dream

Saoirse Ronan not see through enough..

Lucy Hale will be staring as Michael Jackson in the upcoming movie by Johnny Depp about his Glove.. Rumour Mill!

Zendaya is hot

TO SEE THE REST OF THE TITS AT THE AWARDS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Feature|SFW

2020

13

Jan

Minka Kelly Bikini of the Day

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Minka Kelly is one of these barely-a-celebrity – celebrities that I totally missed the boat on.

Meaning that when she was not 39 years old and in her prime, you know back when she was sucking dick to get into movie and TV roles that she probably didn’t consider sucking dick to get into those jobs, they never do….I had no idea who she was and still don’t.

WHICH ONE IS SHE IN THIS PIC? SERIOUSLY

She was born to Aerosmith guitarist Rick Dufay and a groupie mom. I have no idea if her dad was in her life or if it was more of a sperm donation situation. She worked for a plastic surgeon who was going to give her tits instead of a paycheck, to which she said “No thanks, I have my own tits” and the rest is history.

She want on to be on tv shows I’ve never seen and a Maroon 5 video I’ve never seen and I just know that people are excited by her and here is her old ass tits in a bikini, even though they’ve been cum on by Derek Jeter between 2008 and 2011 and his sperm is toxic..a medical biohazard thanks to living that good life.

Posted in:Minka Kelly|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Kendall Jenner Thirst Trappin in her Panties of the Day

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You’d think by now, the Kardashians would be as bored of producing content around themselves in various states of naked – to keep the family empire alive as we are of seeing them.

It’s like give other whore families a chance for some of that marketing money.

I get that it takes little to no effort to do this, girl doesn’t even need to do hair and make-up, just put on a pair of panties a pose in a selfie like a GoneWild amateur on Reddit trying to get her career launched or at least trying to make more money than she does at Subway making sandwiches by posting her nudes up….but when you have a ton of money, status, work lined up…you even a little effort to keep the fans horny for you is too much.

They’ve basically done it all, from sex tapes to turning their dad into a chick after he cut off his own dick….so panty selfies that anyone with a phone can do is a joke…and people talk about them like it’s not a joke…or like it’s hot cuz you can’t see her acne scars…but all I see is shit stains…even if I don’t actually see the shit stains…I can fucking smell them through my computer….

I just hate disgusting humans…and all these humans are disgusting…

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Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Amy Schumer is Disgusting and wants you to call her of the Day

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Amy Schumer is freezing her eggs so that scientists can discover how such a disgusting creature was made and take steps to prevent it from happening again. She also posted her phone number and wants you to call and text her 1 (917) 970-9333….I can’t guarantee that is her number, but I can guarantee that she’s over hyped dog shit, that no one in their right mind would knock up, except maybe a gay dude who got caught up in the adoption system and has been unable to have a kid of his own, because he sees value in having kids with someone rich and famous…plus he’s used to fucking shit, literally…which is basically what SCHUMER is.

I despise anyone who finds her funny and her breeding brings me hope of the apocalypse…let’s just hope she doesn’t get brought to MARS with GRIMES and her BABY on Elon’s nerd Spaceship….to create the next generation of MARS DWELLING HUMANS after our earth explodes…even if bitch already looks fucking alien.

Gross.

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Posted in:Amy Schumer|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Britney Spears Bikini of the Day

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Britney Spears looks like she just got back from WWIII with all the Millennials who the OK BOOMERS were mad at, even though she’s too old to be a Millennial as she pushes 40….

What I am trying to say in my drunken state is that she’s looking rough, but at 40, that’s ok…what the fuck do you expect for a girl who’s been hopped up on pills for the last 20 years, in order to keep producing money for the empire that is based on her producing money…

She’s in her bikini, looking tired, rocking some near pussy hip tats which I am sure she wishes K-Fed used as a target for his orgasm….instead of her CERVIX / UTERUS….but that iconic “knock up a broken bitch and be set for life”….is sweet redemption for all the women who played the same tactic on rich guys….

I generally don’t like 40 year olds…but it’s Britney Bitch…deal with it.

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Posted in:Britney Spears|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Halsey Fucks the Floor of the Day

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Halsey is a cow, and she’s showing off her cow tits that she bought with her popstar trash money, because she’s manipulated the industry into thinking she’s good, and the industry has manipulated the fans into thinking she’s good, despite just being some DJ slut at an EDM concert who sucked the right dick. I am not a fan.

I remember when she first came up and people were praising her for being “almost homeless” and a “drug addict”….bitch was a party slut but bitch knew how to polarize that shit HARD…and people bought in.

She also plays up that her dad is black, which in and of itself is BLACK FACE in its own right, you know the whole “I’m so victimized, feel sorry for me, connect with me, feel for me, the plight of this ethnicity is my plight too”….garbage…she so white…

Then there’s the whole resurgence of COUNTRY music, something I’ve listened to forever and something I’ve written off people for extended periods of time for spitting back the scripted “anything but country” response to “What music do you like”….people, with no brain or knowledge of anything just denounced an entire GENRE of real fucking music, with real fucking stories, talking about real pain and real hardship, cuz they were trained to say that….I fucking hate you.

I can assure you that both DIPLO and HALSEY and even LIL NAS X all at one point in their lives said “anything but country”….

But country music PAYS the fucking bills, so now it’s cool, trendy, it goes viral..jump on it like it’s a record exec…or in Halsey’s case…a DJ at the club’s dick.

Her bolt on tits are shit, her sleazy country angle is a lie…she is a lie…and lies must be taken out back and shot…

Here she is last week humping a boat on vacation with Evan Peters..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Halsey|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Beatrice Bouchard Got Ass of the Day

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Hometown Hottie Check….Beatrice Bouchard is the TWIN sister of Tennis pro who probably makes a lot of money as a Tennis pro…allowing her TWIN to just sort of chill as she builds up her audience with bikini pics on instagram….that she can monetize and even if she can’t she can get on payroll from the sister’s tennis career…you know they are twins afterall….

I think it’s funny knowing that one sister had to be disciplined, taken out of school to make it to the level of tennis she’s at…while the TWIN…just sort of said “have fun with that, I’ll travel to all the exclusive places you go and wear a bikini when I do it”….it’s like why bother working towards tennis at the pro level, when you can be the sister of tennis at the pro level, so you can spend your 20s in the party, at the club, doing the bikini thing…it makes so much sense to me….not to mention she’s hot…

So hometown hottie check…straight from the Mean Streets of Montreal…pay some attention to this Bouchard…she’s good.

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Posted in:Beatrice Bouchard|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Hailey Baldwin Tits for Jesus of the Day

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Hailey Baldwin is some bullshit money grubbing famewhore from a d-list celebrities SOBER HOUSE, because her dad Billy Baldwin found Jesus in recovery and you know when you’re an A Personality Narcissistic actor with a substance abuse problem, who replaces that substance abuse with religion abuse…weird things happen…like Hailey Bieber…

So the conflicted daughter who just wanted to be a vapid Kardashian or HAdid and did anything she could to be with them at all times to get some of their shine, which I guess worked, as it got her invited to Bieber’s birthday party when she was 16….and when he fucked her for the first time…as girls raised in some weird variation of the church, thanks to her dad being a weird religious dude in recovery…and the rest of their romance is a modern day love story history….

Two broken entitled empty rich kids, turning to some weird pastor, or sect to find each other and to do the good American Wholesome family thing like getting married without a prenup….

So now she’s officially set for life. Like some Pop Culture royal family only not quite a Meghan Markle level of Royalty, because that hooker infiltrated the actual royal family, and she’s not even that good of an actor, but I guess she’s that good with her pussy, where as Hailey Bieber didn’t need to act her way into her “position” like a prostitute…she just sort of moved in on it…used God to bait dude…and now together they share the EPTEIN BARR virus..in GOD’s eye…or something.

ANYWAY…she walks around with her tits out, sexualizing herself, trying to be a celebrity or instagram model, all in the name of her CHURCH…or personal gain, we haven’t figured that one out…but we have figured out that she’s trash.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

She had her tits out earlier in the week too…

Here she is at the Golden Globe Awards last night

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Posted in:Hailey Baldwin Bieber|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Madison Beer Tight Leggings of the Day

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Madison Beer may be some trash that crawled out of the gutter of YOUTUBE with millions of views from pervert old men who use YOUTUBE for it is intended purpose….to creep on girls…by making it a place the seemingly seems safe for girls to upload content….and that is encouraged by their parents…because they want to be Biebers too.

Using those views she got that record deal, so that she can now call the paparazzi anytimes she’s feeling cute to either show off her tits, or show off her round ass in leggings, because the paparazzi are so desperate, they show up everywhere they are told…just trying to make a dollar in this internet generation of all their pics get posted to social media in 3 minutes of taking them by Madison Beer or whoever fans around the world….impossible to control…

As it turns out, asses in leggings are wonderful.

To See the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Madison Beer|SFW

2020

10

Jan

Naked Models for a Boring Calendar of the Day

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This is some BORING fucking content….

Not to mention, V Magazine is the fucking devil. It is some scammy bullshit that people just assume is relevant because models do shoots with them, it’s all an inside job, clickbait bullshit likely owned by Victoria’s Secret or the Kardashians or some other scenester shit in NYC…because look who they used for their bullshit Calendar no one gives a fuck about….

I wrote about them last week when I posted the shitty GIGI pic, basically they did a male model search that I applied to be in, using the picture in the header of this site, because I’m a stud…..and I beat out all the queer topless male model dudes like looked like women….

I beat them by THOUSANDS of votes…I am sure I could find the link….hold up… THIS WAS THE ORIGINAL POST CIRCA 2011 …

Needless to say, I won, but they didn’t acknowledge it…..so fuck them motherfuckers and the garbage model sluts they used in 2020….9 years after they broke my spirits down….

You can see Gigi Hadid’s shoot here

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Posted in:Half Naked Model|SFW

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